


Explain to me the meaning of Pi(e)?

by allkindsofcrazythings (Becca22)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abusive John Winchester, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - High School, F/M, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-10-26
Updated: 2015-02-16
Packaged: 2017-12-30 13:59:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 29
Words: 67,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1019463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Becca22/pseuds/allkindsofcrazythings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean struggles through life, trying to raise his little brother so he can have a safe happy life away from their abusive alcoholic deadbeat of a father while going through the pains of high school himself. Thankfully help seems on the horizon in the form of fellow student Castiel who'll not only help Dean with his math homework but might just be what he needs to turn his life around for good.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A New Start

**Author's Note:**

> Super huge thanks to tumblr user sanityslayer for helping me with the title and in general. Thank you! 
> 
> There isn't much math logic just as a pre-warning its a plot filler.

The smell of bacon filled the small kitchen as Dean hurriedly put on another couple of slices of toast and returned to pushing the eggs currently scrambling around the pan.  
Sam walked into the kitchen looking half asleep and grumpy. Dean smirked slightly but stifled his chuckle knowing full well Sam would not appreciate it.

“Sit down Sammy, eggs, are almost done” Dean said.

Sam nodded and walked over to the small table that sat only two. He pulled out one of the small wooden chairs the back squeaking and almost coming out in Sam’s strong grip. Dean walked over to the beaten silver fridge and pulled out a carton of orange juice and picked up a glass on his way to place them both down in front of Sam. Sam picked it up and poured himself a glass. He watched as an orange droplet ran down the side of the glass onto the wooden table top.

Dean was back tending to the eggs over the mediocre hob. He turned off the gas and stepped to the right to check the bacon on the grill. Deciding it was done Dean pulled it out and separated it onto two plates. He put two slices on one and one on the other and then proceeded to split the eggs putting slightly more onto the plate with 2 slices of bacon. He grabbed both plates’ added two slices of the now buttered toast and put them on the table, the one with the most food going in front of Sam.

Sam looked up most likely about to complain at Dean for giving him more food. He opened his mouth but Dean rolled his eyes and raised a hand before he could speak “first day at a new school you need the energy”

“You’re starting a new school too Dean” Sam quirked back

“yeah but I can get by on my good looks and charm, you need the brain power” Sam smirked and Dean stood and ruffled his hair as he walked to the fridge and pulled out some orange juice when he returned however there were more eggs on his plate. Dean smiled at the sentiment and sat down to eat his breakfast.

***

They were both running around the house shoving things into their bag and grabbing the lunches Dean made the night before. It was an intricate dance but they managed well after years of practice successfully avoiding bumping into each other and occasionally tossing things they might need to each other.

Five minutes later the house was a mess and if they waited any longer to leave they would be late, and on a first day that would be just the sort of impression he didn't want Sam to give. Dean didn't so much bother about himself he would manage but Sam, Sam had to do well he had to or else he would never escape their father. Dean shook himself; he’d get Sam as far away as he could. Dean called up to Sam “SAMMY COME ON, WE’RE GOING TO BE LATE” when there was no reply he added “I’M SURE YOUR HAIR LOOKS FINE” that got him the response he wanted. Sam stomped down the stair giving Dean his best bitch face only causing the older brother to laugh. When Sam reached the bottom of the stairs he pulled his back pack on. Dean grabbed the keys to his car and the journey to school began.

 

***

Thankfully it wasn't a long journey and they arrived with a few minutes to spare. Dean and Sam both climbed out of the car grabbing their bags. Dean glanced round the parking lot. It was the same as all the others cars littered it as did the few students who stood around chatting. Dean did how ever notice one thing that he convinced him there may be people here he could really connect with. Sitting there across the lot was a rather pretty motorbike. The only bike in the lot, Dean wasn't a giant motorcycle fan. He much preferred his ’67 Chevy Impala. Apart from Sammy it was the most important thing in his life. That said Dean did appreciate a good bike and wondered a little about the owner of this one.

He walked with Sam into the office where they both registered and got their class time table. The student who greeted them walked Sam to his class room first and in proper movie style his teacher introduced him as the new kid, Sam Winchester. Then it was Dean’s turn after a quick “I’ll meet you for lunch Sammy” he was on his way. Anna, the student walking him to his class, told him little stories on the way about the building and the teachers. Dean didn't take any of it in but was polite until they reached his classroom. To his surprise she walked in with him. She was in his class that made sense. Dean took his seat after being introduced to the class. A few of the girls looked his way and Dean slapped on his charming smile, maybe it wouldn't be too bad here.

Although the girls all look at Dean because sure he was the new kid and 'interesting', Dean found himself really not all that interested. Sure it was nice to get the attention and he was sure he'd like to make friends with a few of them but he wasn't interested in them the way they seemed to be in him. Suddenly their eyes seemed to bore into him and found himself feeling rather self-conscious, he focused his eyes forward and was grateful when the teacher Mr. ... Whatever it was demanded the attention of the biology class. Thankfully that lesson seemed to pass by quickly, after that and the bell was ringing. Anna walked over to where dean was sitting and asked

“so what's your next class?” dean smiled at her and pulled out his timetable. He wondered if she still had to be nice to him or if he'd made a good impression on her. Anna was nice. He could use her as a friend. “I have math next” dean groaned math was his least favourite subject. He could just never get the hang of all the rules.

“Ah, that sucks! I have history. Come on I'll show you where it is” dean tucked his timetable back into his jacket and swipe his books into his bag. “I’m sure I can find it, honestly you don’t have if it’s inconvenient” Anna smiled at him and laughed slightly

“It’s not inconvenient; they're in the same direction. Besides I like you Winchester, I think we could be friends” Dean smiled, he definitely could use Anna as a friend.

“Well if you're sure and hey, I'd like to be friends too” with that they walked out the mostly empty classroom and walked down the corridor towards their next classes. Again Anna told him little stories about the school and what was behind each respective door. Dean listened to what she said but didn't take much in as far as he could remember he'd walked past... Languages?... Yeah, languages. He looked around the corridor they must be a bit late its empty apart from the slight trickle of students and them. That is when Dean noticed him, a guy drinking from the water fountain.

Dark brown hair covered his head and he wore skinny jeans a green t-shirt and a leather jacket all combining to make this guy pretty attractive. Dean was questioning it when the guy looked up and squinted at him. He can't tell you much about his appearance except that he's pretty sure the guy was gorgeous because he was too distracted by the blue eyes that were fixed on him. He tilted his head slightly before twisting and walking away from him. Dean interrupted Anna's story about a junior who actually slipped on a banana peel in the corridor and asked her 'who is that guy' Anna blinked at him 'who?' she asked.

Dean pointed down the corridor unaware that wasn’t the way she was facing. But she noticed his arm moved and followed its direction. “That? oh, that's Castiel”. Dean wondered about him. So it turns out he might not have been interested in the girls in his last class but he really wanted to get to know the guy from the corridor better. “Castiel” Dean tried the name out on his tongue.

“Well this is you” Anna pointed at the door next to them. Dean hadn't realised they'd moved from their previous spot. Damn this Castiel... Cas is distracting. Dean thanked Anna and opened the door when Anna said to him just before he walked in “hey, I'll meet you here after class and walk you to the cafe for break” Dean nodded at her and with that she left. Dean explained again how he was new and again he received the looks of people who were fascinated by him being mysterious and new.

But this time Dean wasn't bothered he was thinking of Cas and the way he looked bent over drinking from the fountain. Woah dangerous territory for class Dean! Pull it together. He tried to focus on what Mrs. ... Mrs Math ... He really had to try remember his teachers names was saying but well it made no sense to him and his mind kept drifting back to those two blue eyes. Dean thinks they might be the nicest eyes he's ever seen! Second only to his mums.

Math passed at a strangely fast pace, as math never does. But Dean didn't really notice. That was probably attributed to the fact that he spent very little time thinking about math. Instead his mind ran over the details he could remember of Castiel. The bell finally rang and Dean realised he’d written one equation and hadn't even answered it. Great that is gonna be more work to finish at home. Once again he shoved his books into his bag and went outside to wait for Anna.

He only waited a couple of minutes before he saw her meandering towards him through the crowd. “Hey, how was Math?” Anna asked smiling at him.  
“Oh err, it flew by” Dean replied as he was dragged along the corridor. “Come on, café is this way”.

They sat at a table with some of Anna’s friends. Dean met Ruby, Meg, Rachel, Balthazar and Raphael. They were all pretty friendly and seemed nice enough to get on with. He listened as they all talked about their plans for the weekend. As it turns out Meg was having a party and invited Dean along. He said he’d have to check but would like to go. His gaze swept round the café.

“Looking for someone?” Balthazar asked in his surprisingly British accent. How had Dean missed that? “Yeah I’m looking for… my brother” Dean blinked heavily he was about to say Cas… but no he was definitely looking for his brother. “Just wanna check in on his first day so far” Dean supplied. He looked around for a little more with still no luck. “Well, what’s he look like?”

“He is freakishly tall, has long hair and has a kinda lost puppy look on his face” Balthazar looked thoughtful as if he was trying to picture him. “Hey, if you spot him before I do you can have my pudding cup at lunch” Dean proposed waggling his eyebrows. “You are so on” Balthazar replied frantically searching the crowded room. He stood up and squinted “There is that him?” he asked pointing. Dean turned to where Balthazar’s finger lead.

“Yeah it is!” Dean exclaimed waving his arms to catch Sam’s attention. Sam saw him and said something to a boy that was with him before making his way over. When he reached them Dean clapped him on the shoulder and said “heya Sammy, how’s the first day goin’?”

Sam explained how his first two classes went fine and yes he is making friends which he has to get back to. But since they saw each other now, do they have to meet at lunch because Gabriel has this really cool thing he wants to show me. Dean laughed slightly at his enthusiasm but told him “I understand too cool to hang with the big bro huh? It’s alright Sammy go have fun with Gabriel, I’ll see you at the end of the day” he did manage to ruffle his hair slightly before he left.

Dean felt himself relax from a tension he didn’t know he was holding. It reassured him to know that Sam was happy. When he turned back to the table he realised everyone had stopped talking and were all looking at him. “Shit, I’m sorry I should have introduced you all, well anyway that was my little bro Sammy” they all made appropriate comments about how he seems lovely and is really cute. Dean found himself explaining how smart he was as well. That he planned to go to Stanford and would one day become a big hotshot lawyer. Dean glowed the way he always did when he talked about Sam and he kept talking right up until the bell rang, which he hadn't realised was going to happen.

“You’re really proud of him” Anna said once everyone else had left “yeah” Dean answered even though it wasn't a question.

Anna walked him to his next class, English lit, then met her after as they both had P.E. together. Then it was lunch, which passed smoothly he saw Sammy in passing in the corridor with who he assumed was Gabriel and gave a small wave, receiving one and a big smile back. He unfortunately did have to give his pudding cup over to Balthazar who seemed much too happy about it. They chatted some more and then separated to their individual classes. Dean read the word ART on his time table and was pleased. He was no artist but he could move a brush around a page. He was even happier when he realised his final class of the day was a free. Although he’d have to wait for Sammy to finish so he couldn't go home he could at least sit in his baby and listen to his music.

The afternoon flew by and before Dean knew it he was sitting in his Impala drinking a coffee he got from the café beforehand, blaring AC/DC and trying to finish his math homework. With his window down Dean sang along until he got too frustrated with the math and thinking the parking lot was clear threw his math book out the window in a fit of rage. He felt better having expelled some of the frustration energy in the tossing of his book. That was however until he heard “OW! What the hell!”

Shit! Dean had hit someone with his book he turned to look out the window. No he hadn't hit just anyone! Of course he had to go and fucking hit Cas.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “OW! What the hell!” Castiel called covering his face and slightly surprised by the sudden attack. He looked around for the offending object and found a small book lying in a muddy pile covered in scored out math. He heard the creaking of a car door and turned to see the guy getting out. He wore a horrified expression on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Super huge thanks to tumblr user sanityslayer for being my editor, motivator and muse. Thank you!

Castiel pushed open the door walking out to the parking lot. Finally! He thought to himself. School was over for another day. He walked along hearing someone blaring AC/DC, he walked and recognised the lyrics

_‘Cause the walls started shaking,_

_The earth was quaking,_

_My mind was achin’_

_And we were makin’ it and you_

_Shook me all night long,_

_Yeah you, shook me all night long._

Castiel adapted a slight shuffle to his walk as he danced along to the song. He thought to himself whoever was playing the music had good taste. Lost in his thought he stumbled slightly. Castiel looked at his feet and realised that his shoe lace was undone and that’s what he’d tripped on. He bent down to tie his lace again next to the car that was playing the music, he noticed from his brief glance the man inside appeared very contented singing along to his music. He gave his full attention to his lace and began the knot when instead of singing there was a groan and suddenly Castiel was being hit in the face.

“OW! What the hell!” Castiel called covering his face and slightly surprised by the sudden attack. He looked around for the offending object and found a small book lying in a muddy pile covered in scored out math. He heard the creaking of a car door and turned to see the guy getting out. He wore a horrified expression on his face.

“Shit! I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know you were there. Are you ok Cas…tiel?” he fussed. Castiel faltered slightly at the fact that not only did it appear this man knew his name but he seemed to have shortened it. He must have realised what he’d done because he blushed furiously before explaining

“Oh err, Anna pointed you out to me when she was showing me around. Are you ok?” He placed his hand on Castiel’ shoulder and added “I’m Dean by the way” he said rubbing the back of his neck and looking at his feet.

Castiel finally moved his hand away from his face and held it out to Dean. “Anna... of course… pleasure to meet you” Dean saw the movement and looked up from his feet to Castiel’s hand he was about to take when he suddenly drew his hand back.

“Crap you’re bleeding!” Dean ducked back into the Car while Castiel looked at his hand. Sure enough there was a red smudge on there. He rubbed his cheek to wipe away any blood, when suddenly a tissue was rubbing gently on his face.

Dean must have gotten a tissue from the car. Castiel went to take the tissue from Dean but ended up covering his hand. He blushed slightly and took the tissue from him. “Thank you, I’m sure I’ll be perfectly fine” Castiel extended the tissue to point at the notebook, still siting soggy in the muddy puddle. “You’re work on the other hand…”

“Ah damn, oh well it wasn’t like it was much good anyway” Dean blushed slightly at being caught having a tantrum. “I err, I don’t like math” Dean smiled shyly and scratched the back of his neck. Castiel took the book from Dean’s hand and gave it a wipe with a blood-less part of the tissue. After having wiped most of the mud off and now being able to clearly read the writing Castiel squinted at the page

 “The answer is four” Dean’s jaw dropped slightly,

“What?”

Castiel looked up at Dean meeting his surprised eyes “the answer is four, you forgot to add here” Castiel pointed at the sheet as Dean looked down to see.

“Oh that actually makes sense” Dean took the book from him and studied it. “How did you get this part to add up?” Dean asked Castiel referring to the question. Just as he was about to answer a few fat drops of rain landed on them.

“This is your car, yes?” He waited for Dean’s nod of agreement before continuing “perhaps I can show you in there out of the rain?”

“Yeah, yeah sure” Dean put his hand out gesturing to the car. Castiel walked round and pulled open the door handle taking his seat on the passenger side joining Dean. He faced Dean and noticed him wiping a droplet of rain running down his face from his hair. Castiel took this moment to look over Dean’s face. He admired his lips sitting in a natural pucker that were just asking to be kissed but what truly caught his attention were his eyes. Castiel found himself lost in the green depth there. It took him a moment to realise that if he was staring into his eyes, Dean was watching him do so. Warmth spread through his neck and face, he coughed and picked up the math work and started to explain how to do it. He noticed that Dean stared a few moments longer before looking down at the book.

As Castiel explained the rule to use he couldn’t help finding it adorable when Dean’s forehead creased as he got confused. But when Dean got very frustrated and jerked in his seat hitting his hands on the wheel Castiel couldn’t help but laugh hysterically until Dean joined in after being grumpy for a few seconds. They finally finished the work luckily as the bell rang a few moments later.

“Thanks for helping me Cas, I think that’s the first time I’ve ever gotten math” his gratitude shone through but Cas heard the nickname. That was the second time he’d called him that, no-one else did at least not to his face. His family called him Cassie and no-one else wanted to give him a nickname. Dean must have realised he called him by his nickname because his eyes widened and he asked “you don’t mind me calling you Cas do you? Castiel is a bit of a mouth full” Cas smiled

“By all means please call me Cas, you’re just the first to do so” Dean seemed very surprised by this.

“You’re friends, family? They don’t call you Cas?” he inquired

“My family call me Cassie, annoyingly, it’s a name from when I was little and it stuck” Cas squirmed that was embarrassing why did he tell him that.

“And your friends…” Dean prodded. Cas took a breath

“I don’t really have friends… none close enough to warrant a nickname anyway” Cas suddenly fell silent. He doesn’t tell people this partly because he has no one to tell but also party because it leads to questions and its questions like these Cas doesn’t like answering. Before Dean could ask any questions Cas stated. “Well the bell has gone, I should probably go” He put his hand on the door handle and moved to get out when Dean’s hand on his arm stopped him. He turned back to face him.

“Wait Cas! I don’t understand why you don’t have friends” Dean began. Great! Cas thought to himself, here come the questions he hoped to avoid but Deans hand still rested on his arm and Cas couldn’t bring himself to remove it. “But I want to see you again” Dean finished almost shyly. Cas was stunned, that was highly unexpected. He stayed silent just staring at Dean. Who eventually continued “you know if you wanna, I mean I’ll probably have more math to do soon and god I suck without you” He laughed a little nervous chuckle. 

“I would like that, Dean” Cas finally responded He put his hand over Dean’s and wrapped his fingers around it, slowly pulling it from where it still rested on his arm, he moved it to the seat and gave it a small squeeze before glancing briefly back at Dean’s now blushing face before finally opening the car and getting out. He closed the door behind him, he continued towards his original destination when he heard another door open.

“See ya around then” Dean shouted after him. Cas turned back smiling and gave a little wave to acknowledge and accept what Dean said. Cas felt like skipping. Today had turned out a lot better than he had originally thought.  He walked back to his motorbike and his bag now sitting damp because of the rain. Castiel huffed he should have put it away properly before going back into school. Still Cas couldn’t find it in himself to be mad, he was too happy. So he stored it under the seat of his bike and pulled on his helmet before driving off with a final wave at Dean who had been watching the entire time.

Cas rode home, going the longer way than normal. He found himself enjoying the scenery and the ride more than ever, being with Dean had Cas feeling very happy. He couldn’t get him out of his head and Dean wanted to see him again! A sudden fear clamped down on Cas, his happiness crumbling under the weight.  Cas pulled into the driveway his previous happiness tainted with fear. The fear of losing Dean before they even had the chance to be friends.

He parked his bike and grabbed his bag. Marching inside Cas went straight up stairs and slumped face down on his bed. A knock to his door interrupted him, he moaned and grumbled “go away!” he heard laughter and his door click open. He turned to face the door knowing full well who he would see there. “What do you want Anna?”

“I just came to talk to my little bro, what’s wrong with that?” she asked as she sat on his bed.

“What if your little bro doesn’t want to talk to you?” he quipped back making room for her on the bed none the less.

“Oh come on Cassie! I just came to tell you, the new boy at school was asking about you” she sing-songed.

“Dean! Really? What did he ask?” Cas questioned failing to hide his eagerness. Anna looked at him questioningly.

“Well he just asked your name but he seemed pretty enchanted, hey what happened to your face!?” she raised her hand touching his cheek. Cas was puzzled for a moment before he remember the small long forgotten cut there from Dean’s notebook. He smiled

“Oh that’s nothing, it’s actually the funny story of how I met Dean” Cas launched into the story recapping everything that happened with Dean. Probably the only perk of having no friends is that he became very close with his sister and telling her things came easy to him.  They shared everything.

“Did you give him your number?” Anna asked once Cas had finished his story.

“No! I didn’t and he didn’t give me his, I guess I’ll just see him tomorrow at school” Cas rationalised, relieved that he wasn’t suddenly burdened with thinking about what to say to him. Anna pulled her phone from her pocket and picked up the notepad and pen that permanently stayed on Cas’ bedside table. She wrote something down and handed it over to Cas, who took it and read what it said. Written on it was the word Dean and it was followed by what looked like a mobile number. He looked sharply back up at Anna.

“I got it from him so I could text him details about Meg’s party, judging from your story I don’t think he’d mind my giving it to you. Now you can decide what to do” Cas gave Anna a hug before she rose from the bedroom and walked over to the door. “Dinner should be ready in about half an hour, I think it’s pizza” she told him.

“Isn’t it always? Hey Anna, thank you” Cas replied. Anna winked at him before leaving the room, she closed the door with a click and Cas listened as her footsteps grew faint. He stared down at the numbers in his hand. He pulled out his phone and added the contact details for fear of losing them. Ridiculous really he could always ask Anna for them again and it really wasn’t in Cas’ nature to lose things, he was very well organised. Well losing things that weren’t friends.

Still paranoia swept over him and Cas relaxed slightly at knowing he had two copies of the number but his relief at not being burdened with thinking of something to say was squashed. He could say nothing and just pretend he didn’t have the number, it’s not like Dean knew he did. Maybe he would find it creepy if Cas suddenly had his number when Dean wasn’t the one to give it. Although Dean did say he wanted to see Cas again. That is how Cas found himself staring down at the blank message screen. There lay Dean’s number all that was needed was Cas’ message but of course not a single word came to mind. So he simply sat staring at his phone hoping inspiration would come to him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading, please let me know what you think either in the comments below or at my tumblr (allkindsofcrazythings)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Dean? Dean? Are we going inside sometime today?” Sam looked at him grinning. “Dude, where was your head?” Dean looked over at Sam and then out the windscreen of his car. They were sitting in the driveway but Dean still had his hand on the wheel. He didn’t remember parking in the driveway. He turned off the engine.
> 
> “Yeah Sammy, let’s go inside. You’ve got homework to be doing” Damn, Cas was really on his mind, dangerously so. Thank god he’s a good driver, he could have crashed!
> 
> “Dean? Come on” Sam shouted from at the doorstep. Dean finally got out his car and walked into the house following Sam.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Super huge thanks to tumblr user sanityslayer for being my editor, motivator and muse. Thank you!
> 
> You guys should totally go check out her Assassin!Cas fic, Our Uncertain Futures!

Dean was left standing outside his car shocked. Of course the bike belonged to Cas, who else would it belong to? Dean really shouldn’t be surprised he was the one person he was interested in and the one bike in probably all of existence that Dean admired. Of course it should belong to Cas. And dammit if the guy isn’t ten times hotter for it.  Dean sat back in the car to wait for Sam he shouldn’t be that much longer, the parking lot was now full of kids leaving the school.

Dean eventually spots Sam across the lot talking to Gabriel. After about two minutes Sam saunters across and settles into the passenger seat.

“Did you have a good day Sammy?” Dean asks as he starts the car and begins navigating his way through the parking lot. Sam told him about his classes and the cool science project and a pretty little blonde girl called Jess. He seemed to focus mostly on this Jess and Dean couldn’t help but smirk and elbow his brother.

“So little Sammy’s got a crush huh? And it’s only our first day” he said glad that Sam seemed happy and to be settling well into the new school. Sam squirmed and ducked his head out of embarrassment.

“I think being the mysterious new kid is helping for once” Sam told his big brother, who smiled happily as he drove them home. Maybe this school would be good for both of them. Sam had friends, he had Gabriel and now a girlfriend might be in sight. Dean himself, well he was going to get Cas as his friend. He could see it needed work there are obviously some wounds here and a reason why Cas has no friends. Dean couldn’t wrap his head around why someone like Cas wouldn’t have friends he was smart and interesting not to mention incredibly attractive. Well Dean was not going to be put off by whatever was going on, he knew better than most not to judge someone by the situations they are in but to learn about them first. That’s what Dean decided to do. That didn’t stop a million possibilities running through his head about what the reason could be though.

“Dean? Dean? Are we going inside sometime today?” Sam looked at him grinning. “Dude, where was your head?”  Dean looked over at Sam and then out the windscreen of his car. They were sitting in the driveway but Dean still had his hand on the wheel. He didn’t remember parking in the driveway. He turned off the engine.

“Yeah Sammy, let’s go inside. You’ve got homework to be doing” Damn, Cas was really on his mind, dangerously so. Thank god he’s a good driver, he could have crashed!

“Dean? Come on” Sam shouted from at the doorstep. Dean finally got out his car and walked into the house following Sam.

As soon as he was through the door he saw his dad lying passed out on the sofa with a mostly empty whiskey bottle in his hand and surrounded by empty beer bottles. Dean watched as Sam walked upstairs, abandoning his bag at the door Dean starting picking up the empty bottles and putting them in the trash. Then he jerked the almost empty whiskey bottle from his father’s sleeping grip and put it at the back of the cupboard, hiding it behind the last couple of slices of bread. He knew John would find it, he always did, but that wouldn’t stop Dean from trying to keep his dad sober for as long as possible. He filled his dad a glass of water and placed it on the table next to him, along with some aspirin, not that’s he’d use it. It’s hard to have a hangover when you are constantly drunk. With his dad as taken care of as possible Dean decided he should probably do his homework. He picked up his bag and walked upstairs to join Sammy in the room they shared.

The room was still pretty plain, it’s not like they’d had the time nor have the money to decorate it. They only moved in the other day, it didn’t take long. Not owning a lot of things does make moving less of a hassle but it doesn’t make it any easier. He collapsed on his bed and pulled out his homework settling himself on his stomach and elbows. Homework it was his first day and he had homework, how is that fair? Thank god he started school on Wednesday that meant he only had two more days until the weekend. With that happy thought he settled down to finish his work. It took him surprisingly less time than he thought especially considering his mind kept wondering to a particular pair of blue eyes.

Dean was once again lost in thought when his phone buzzed in his pocket, he rearranged himself to pull it free. He flipped it open and saw he had one unread message from an unknown number he selected it to read, but there were no words. It was completely blank. Dean thought about it but couldn’t think who or why he would receive this text he just shrugged it off and continued day dreaming. Until his phone buzzed for a second time 10 minutes later, the same unknown number, Dean read this text as well curious when he actually saw writing.

**_I apologise for the blank text. I’m afraid my finger slipped._ **

**_Anna asked me to contact you, to inform you Meg’s party has been_ **

**_moved to our house due to some complications I believe._ **

**_She hopes you will be able to come._ **

**_Cas._ **

Dean stared at the text in wonder. Cas? Cas text him? He was confused none of the message really sank in except for the last word. Dean hadn’t made that up had he? He reread it, this time paying more attention. He’d have to ask about how Cas had his number also, ‘our house’? Cas and Anna live together? Dean tapped out a reply.

**_Hey, Cas! Nice to hear from you!_ **

**_How did you get my number though? Not that I mind_ **

**_I’m just confused. Also you live with Anna?_ **

**_I’m still not sure if I can go, will you be there?_ **

**_Dean._ **

He read what he wrote. ‘It’s great to hear from you!’ is that too enthusiastic? Should he take away the exclamation marks? Why is this so difficult? He could ask Sam, no. No he can’t he’d never hear the end of it.  He decided it better to play it safe.

**_Hey, Cas! How did you get my number?_ **

**_Not that I mind I’m just confused. Also you live with Anna?_ **

**_I’m still not sure if I can go, will you be there?_ **

**_Dean._ **

Dean shut his eyes and pressed send hoping everything would work out fine. How bad could it be? He prayed it wasn’t a mistake. He sat staring at his phone willing it to buzz and fearing that it will. In the few moments of silence Dean decided to add Cas to his contact list. Shortly after he was done the phone buzzed in his hand. Dean prepared himself to open it. Why was he being so pathetic about this he’d had a perfectly good conversation with him earlier, it was different by text he couldn’t see his expressions and couldn’t be sure the tone was right. He was far too stressed about this, a lot more than he should be.

**_I was given your number by Anna. Yes we do live together,_ **

**_She is my sister. Where you not aware? Yes I shall be there Dean, considering_ **

**_It is currently where I live._ **

**_Cas._ **

Dean started down at the text, sister! Oh well that was obvious. Of course he’s going to be there it’s at his house now! Dean threw his face into his pillow and rolled his eyes, if he wasn’t trying so hard not to sound like an idiot he might have actually not sounded like an idiot. He groaned and that’s when he realised Sam was still in the room and now watching him.

“Dean? You okay?” Sammy queried looking up from his textbook.

“What? Oh yeah I’m good, you hungry?” Dean countered

“Obvious subject change dude, but since I am hungry I’ll let it go. What we eating?” Dean relaxed a little. Thank god Sam was a growing boy and ate like a moose, food, was always a good distraction.

“I dunno Sammy go downstairs and see what you want” Sam huffed at having to get up but the allure of food was too much and he eventually left the room. Leaving Dean to reply to Cas’ text.

**_Well, yeah that all makes sense. See you_ **

**_tomorrow Cas._ **

**_Dean._ **

Dean sent it and heard Sam calling for him. He dumped his phone on his bed and ran down stairs to make dinner.

 

~ Cas POV ~

                     

Cas stared at his phone he was still hitting his head. He couldn’t believe how his luck went from bad to good so quickly. First he throws his phone down on his bed which somehow not only makes it send a message to Dean but it sends a blank one. Thankfully Anna provided the perfect excuse to text Dean as she brought him some pizza.

“Hey Cassie, you wouldn’t mind if we had a party here on Friday would you?” she had asked him. He never minded, he just stayed in his room and was sure to lock the door so no wonders came in looking for a bed.

“I have no problems with that, why do you ask?” he was sure the party was supposed to be at Meg’s.

“Well Meg’s parents are coming back earlier and ours are obviously still away plus Michael will be gone Thursday to Monday anyway”

“It makes no difference to me Anna” Cas waved her off.

“Dean might be coming” she said trying to tempt him. “Oh that reminds me I should text him the change in plan” that was when a light bulb light up above his head.

“I’ll do it!” Cas practically shouted “I mean I’m texting him anyway” he tried to recover but he saw how Anna looked at him. He tapped out a quick text grateful to have an excuse to text Dean after his earlier blunder. He waited for Dean to reply. Worry gnawed a pit in his stomach, maybe Dean was freaked out that he had his number without Dean himself giving it to him. Just as Castiel had convinced himself he would have to change his number and move country Dean replied. Not only did he reply but he actually seemed happy to talk to Cas although he was curious about how he came to have his number but that was to be expected. He also asked if Cas would be at the party. Did that mean he wanted him to be there or he didn’t? If Cas was there would he come? He thought it would be pretty obvious to Dean that he would be there though considering it was at his house and Dean knows he doesn’t really have friends so it’s not likely he’d be out.

Cas text Dean back, with a smile on his face, he was so happy to have someone to be friends with, to at least be friends with, no. He wasn’t going to risk this by having thoughts like that. He really wanted Dean in his life. Friends would have to do. He just hoped old ones didn’t pop up to ruin it for him.

Still when Dean replied ‘see you tomorrow Cas’ he couldn’t help the bubble of anticipation that floated through his system, he was going to see Dean tomorrow. They’d only met today and Dean already seemed happy to hear from Cas only a few hours later plus wanted to see him tomorrow. Cas tried to push down at his hope as it rapidly rose, it would do no good to think he had a friend in Dean just to lose him. As much as he prayed that would not happen he tried to smother just some of his hope, not enough that he was just left with fear but enough that he hopefully wouldn’t be too heartbroken if Dean were to be ripped from his life.

Still he couldn’t control his subconscious and if he happened to dream about sitting in a car listening to rock songs and green eyes well it might just be the soundest he’s slept for a while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again thank you so much for reading, I hope you liked this chapter. Please let me know what you think either in the comments below or at my tumblr: allkindsofcrazythings


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The school day passed as normal, it was slow and boring. But before Dean knows it he’s already in his fifth period out of six. He only notices this one because it’s a free and he can’t decide where to go. Dean wants to go sit in his baby but it’s really heavy rain and he would get completely soaked and it just wasn’t worth it. Instead Dean found himself wondering the corridors until he eventually found himself standing outside the library. He pushed open the doors and walked in. It was the first time Dean had seen inside the room and he found that he rather likes it. It was spacious and had loads of books either side at the walls and tables down the middle at the end a giant window that looked inviting with a small table tucked behind a bookcase. Perfect Dean thought to himself he could just tuck himself away there and get on with his work. He walked over and saw someone already claimed that table.  
> “Oh sorry I thought it was empty- Cas?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Super huge thanks to tumblr user sanityslayer for being my editor, motivator and muse. Thank you!
> 
> You guys should totally go check out her Assassin!Cas fic, Our Uncertain Futures!

Dean woke up on Thursday in an incredibly happy mood. Of course Sam picked up on it and badgered him about why he was so happy but Dean just kept saying “I had a good night sleep, Sammy. It can do wonders for the soul” Sam just gave Dean another of his bitch faces not buying a word of it. He even asked if it was because of the texts Dean received yesterday nearly choking on his coffee Dean stumblingly reassured Sam that it was absolutely nothing to do with the texts. However Sam was far too happy after that and constantly gave Dean sly looks that said Sam knew exactly why Dean was so happy.

Dean found himself watching Sam get ready for school and wondered, since when was his little brother so intuitive. Dean remembered most of Sam’s life he remembered his first steps, his first word, that one time Sam fell out a tree and cut his arm. He made Dean swear not to tell dad because he’d kill him, so Dean cleaned it up and made it better. Even that time Dean was watching s scary movie too young himself and Sam had sneak out of bed and was watching it from behind the sofa. He had to sleep in Dean’s bed that night because he was so scared. Although Dean himself was only young at the time (there is just a 4 year age gap after all) he remembers all of this. They may not all necessarily be in focus but they're there and Dean treasures them. 

But somehow when Dean looks at Sam now he’s so grown up, when did that happen?

“Dean, come on we gotta go man!” Sammy called recalling Dean from his trip down memory lane.

Alright, alright! I’m coming, I’m coming!”

The school day passed as normal, it was slow and boring. But before Dean knows it he’s already in his fifth period out of six.  He only notices this one because it’s a free and he can’t decide where to go. Dean wants to go sit in his baby but it’s really heavy rain and he would get completely soaked and it just wasn’t worth it. Instead Dean found himself wondering the corridors until he eventually found himself standing outside the library. He pushed open the doors and walked in. It was the first time Dean had seen inside the room and he found that he rather likes it. It was spacious and had loads of books either side at the walls and tables down the middle at the end a giant window that looked inviting with a small table tucked behind a bookcase. Perfect Dean thought to himself he could just tuck himself away there and get on with his work. He walked over and saw someone already claimed that table.

“Oh sorry I thought it was empty- Cas?” Dean stumbled out. It would of course be Cas, of course! Castiel looked up from his book and his face lit up with his smile.

“Dean! Please join me!” Cas gestured to the seat next to him and Dean shuffled round to take his seat. The sat both hidden by the bookcase. Dean pulled out his history work deciding to start on the essay he’s been given. They sat like that for the whole hour, there was some quite talking every now and then but they were both happy in the comfortable silence that lay between them. Dean asked about the book Cas was reading and Cas offered assistance on wording things in Dean’s essay when he struggled with how to word points.  Cas got buried deeper and deeper in his book and Dean concentrated less and less on his essay instead he started doodling glancing at Cas from the corner of his eye every now and then. When the hour was over Dean looked down at his essay and found instead a pretty decent drawing of Cas. He fumbled and tried and failed to stuff it into his bag before Cas could see.

Dean looked up after zipping his bag up the picture now safe to find Cas staring at him. Dammit, did he see? Well he was squinting slightly but Cas did that most of the time anyway. Although he was still nervous and terrified he couldn’t help smiling at Cas because god was he adorable when he squinted. A slight blush spread over Cas face under Dean’s scrutiny and he finally looked away. Dean chuckled to himself and coughed.

“Well, that was fun, great seeing you Cas. Catch you later” Dean spurted hoping he didn’t sound like an idiot.

“Goodbye Dean” Cas shouted after him causing a few people to turn and look. Dean gave him a small wave and walked considerably happy from the library to him next class, art.

Art isn’t particularly productive, their teacher is ill so the substitute gave them the instructions of “just draw something”, clearly not an art teacher. Dean struggled with a subject to draw and tried drawing birds, flowers a random jug he found but nothing felt right. He went into his bag to look for his eraser when he saw the history essay crumpled up in the corner. Dean pulled it out and flattened it on his desk, maybe he could just recreate this? Dean started the drawing and was amazed at how easy it seemed to come to him. It of course helped that Dean could remember every detail about Cas he remembered the exact shade of his eyes even though he couldn’t name it, the shape of his ears and how they hid under his hair, the soft curls of his hair at the back of his neck and the ones that flopped over his for head that had a slight crease in it from reading, the curve of his jaw and the crinkles in his lips. Cas’ face was committed to Dean’s memory making recreating it much easier.

The rest of the day passed by pretty boring, he didn’t see Cas again. Then it was just his usual routine drive home, clean up after dad, do homework, make dinner and then whatever else until bed. The only difference with today was instead of watching TV until bed with Sammy, Dean decided to work on the picture of Cas in his room.

***

Friday comes by rather quickly for Cas. He finds himself incredibly nervous, not only was there a party at his house later this evening which makes Cas rather uncomfortable but Dean would be there. This may very well be the first party that Cas will attend, simply because Dean would be there. Even if parties were held at his home before Cas never bothered going down stairs he just locked himself in his bedroom with food and a good book, listened to his music and didn’t bother with whom ever happened to bump against his door. He hesitantly got showered and dressed for school brushing off or ignoring completely whatever concerns there were about his seemingly off behaviour. But Anna knew the reason for Cas’ nervous behaviour and just smiled at him, since he stopped listening, which annoyed Cas even more. He stormed to school in bad mood, as he went between his classes he scanned for Dean hoping to see him. He was probably the only thing that would help lift Cas’ mood but unfortunately Cas never saw him. The whole day passed and Cas never saw Dean once. He did see Dean’s car but must have kept missing him. Cas drove home still in a bad mood.

Dean wakes up the next morning with his had still curled around the pencil he was using, thankfully he’d put everything else away before Sam came up to bed. Again Dean’s routine made the day pass almost unnoticeably and pretty boring. He couldn’t wait to get to school, not because of school but because Cas was there and Dean adored spending time with him. Dean arrived at school and parked the impala, when he got out he saw Cas’ bike as he got out and a smile beamed across him face that was until his phone vibrated in his pocket. He had a message from John.

**_Had to leave for a few days_ **

**_John._ **

Dean stared down at the message and anger growing in the pit of his stomach. “Everything ok Dean?” Sam asked concern etched across his face. Dean looked up at his little brother and plastered on the best fake smile he could muster.

“Yeah Sammy, everything’s fine, I just realised I left some work at home and I’m gonna need it. So I’ve got to back quickly. Dean waved his brother off into school and got back in the car, he saw Sam talking to who he presumed was Jess from the description of blonde and pretty. How was Dean going to cover this one for dad? He drove back to his house as fast as he could in the hope of catching his father, although Dean knew better, he knew John would only text him once he’d left. Dean crashed through the door and shouted for his father but he was met with an unsurprising silence. Dean slammed his fists into the closest object which luckily happened to be the sofa cushions. He slammed his whole body down! How the hell could his dad do this again? Today! He was supposed to go to that party tonight and see Cas but now he’d have to stay and watch Sam. The anger, disappointment and frustration knocked Dean out.

 He woke up and checked the time, school had about 10 minutes left. “SHIT!” Dean scrambled to grab his keys and jumped in the impala and drove to school. He had about 3 minutes before the bell rang. Dean grabbed the history essay he had due today and raced into the school building to hand it in. He gave it to his teacher and lied as best he could about why he wasn’t in class. A brief lecture later and Dean was back in the parking lot waiting for Sam. As he made his way into his car Dean noticed Cas’ bike was gone and a further disappointment flashed through him. He wouldn’t even get to tell the guy he wasn’t going to make it to the party in person. He’d have to be the douchebag who did it by text. Dean pulled out his phone and typed a simple apology, he thought about sending it but Cas wasn’t his teacher he was his friend so he added a small explanation about how his dad has gone out of town and that meant Dean had to look after Sam. After reading the text through a half a dozen times Dean finally decides it’s acceptable to send. He quickly presses the appropriate buttons and pushes his phone back into his pocket. Sam opened the passenger door and slide in a moment later “Hey Dean”

“Hey Sammy, how was school?” Dean loved asking Sam this question. He got to learn all about the things his little brother did in his day and can easily grasp how well his brother is doing by his response. If Sam talks a lot he’s happy, if Dean needs to pull more of an answer out of him something’s wrong. Today Sam spilled his guts like a tipped over bottle, specifically about Jess. So few days spent here but Sam already had it bad for that girl. “Have you asked her out yet?” Dean probed

“What, Dean? No! She’s only known me for a couple of days!” Sam spluttered

“Look Sammy, I saw her with you this morning, I’m pretty sure she likes you back, can’t imagine what she sees but she definitely sees something she likes”

“You think? Hmm, maybe I will ask her then”

“That’s the spirit” Dean smiled at his brother and pulled into their drive. “Sammy listen to me for a sec, Dad’s well dad’s had to go out of town for a while. I’m not sure how long for but we’ll be ok, ok?” Sam didn’t even bother replying to Dean he just got out of the car and walked into the house. “SAM!” Dean tried to call after him but Sam just marched away. Dean slammed the door to the impala “Son of a bitch!” Dean eventually followed Sam in. When Dean got inside he couldn’t see Sam, so he figured he must be in their room. That wasn’t a good sign, Sammy was definitely angry. Not surprising really so was Dean. This called for the big guns and Dean got right to it. He made his world famous Sammy favourite burgers. The smell of them cooking alone brought Sam down from the room.

“You made burgers?” Sam questioned his head popping round the kitchen door.

“Hell yeah I did! I was thinking burgers and maybe a little Game of Thrones marathon?” Dean tempted. Sam walked over and gave his brother a hug.

“Thanks Dean” Dean pulled away from the hug.

“Ok, you go set up Game of Thrones and I’ll plate up the best burger you’ve ever had” Sam smirked at Dean and walked off to accomplish the task he had been set. As Dean began plating the burgers his phone buzzed. Dean pulled it from his pocket and saw he had a new text from Cas.

**_That is alright Dean, I completely understand._ **

**_I hope you have an enjoyable night_ **

**_with Sam._ **

**_Cas._ **

Dean pushed his phone back into his pocket and swallowed down his anger. He’d been looking forward to this party, to spending time with friends and having fun. Dean hastily finished serving the burgers and took them through to join Sam in the living room.

A burger and a Game of Thrones episode later Sam’s phone beeped. Dean paused starting the second one until Sam was ready. “Hey, Dean? Would it be cool if I stayed at Gabriel’s tonight?” Sam’s face was a mixture of emotions he looked guilty for asking but excited to go.

“Oh yeah Sammy, sure thing, as long as this isn’t you running away from me because you’re angry at dad” Dean was more than happy to let Sam go but if it was just because Sam was angry with John then they’d need to have a talk first.

“No Dean, I swear it isn’t, he just invited me and I’d really like to go.”

“Ok well you’d better go and grab what you need then and I’ll drive you over”

“We can wait until after Game of Thrones” Sam told Dean although Dean could read him like a book and knew he was only saying that so Dean wouldn’t feel as bad.

“Nah, we can do this another time, go on! Go pack” Dean waved off his brother who ran over gave him a quick hug.

“THANKS DEAN” Sam shouted back as he ran up the stairs. A few minutes later Dean and Sam were back in the car and making their way towards the address Gabriel had sent them. It was relatively easy to find and only a slightly longer drive than to school, taking most of the same roads. They arrived and saw Gabriel standing outside waiting he waved ecstatically when he saw the car. Sam and Dean shared a quick goodbye and Dean ran through the rules. No drinking, don’t stay up too late and call me tomorrow when you want me to pick you up and with that Sam left. Dean sat in his car and waited for his excited brother and Gabriel to go inside, they both turned before walking through the door and waved and then they were gone. Dean was left alone. Well why couldn’t he have some fun, he pulled out his phone and sent Cas a text asking where he lived. He replied almost instantly and Dean sent a quick see you soon before driving towards the address his mood increasing in happiness the closer he got.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again thank you so much for reading, I hope you liked this chapter. Please let me know what you think either in the comments below or at my tumblr: allkindsofcrazythings


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean pulled up outside the house obviously having a party, Dean guessed he’d found Cas’ house, he shouldn’t have bothered asking for an address he could have just followed the sound of music. Parking was relatively easy but then again since a lot of people would be drinking it makes sense that there wouldn’t be many cars. Dean sat in his car nervously, now what was he supposed to do? Should he just walk up and go into the house or should he text Cas and tell him he’s here. Dean sighed at himself, god he could be pathetic sometimes. He pulled out his phone and was about to type a plea to Cas to meet him when he was disrupted by a tapping on his window. Dean jumped and swung his head round to see Balthazar smiling back at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has taken a while to come and I apologise for that a lot! I had a huge lack of motivation but it's here now all because of hearts_reflection and you guys should go read her new fic Which Witch Is Which.
> 
> Super huge thanks to tumblr user sanityslayer for being my editor, motivator and muse. Thank you!

Dean pulled up outside the house obviously having a party, Dean guessed he’d found Cas’ house, he shouldn’t have bothered asking for an address he could have just followed the sound of music. Parking was relatively easy but then again since a lot of people would be drinking it makes sense that there wouldn’t be many cars. Dean sat in his car nervously, now what was he supposed to do? Should he just walk up and go into the house or should he text Cas and tell him he’s here. Dean sighed at himself, god he could be pathetic sometimes. He pulled out his phone and was about to type a plea to Cas to meet him when he was disrupted by a tapping on his window. Dean jumped and swung his head round to see Balthazar smiling back at him.

“Hello Dean, coming in anytime soon?” he asked as Dean opened the door. He pushed his phone back in his pocket and got out the door locking it behind him.

“Yeah, yeah let’s go” Dean gestured and followed behind glad that this was a much less awkward way to join the party. Dean and Balthazar made their way up the drive towards the door in relative silence, when they finally reached it Balthazar knocked loudly trying to be heard over the music blaring. It became obvious they were not and both repeatedly slammed their fists against the door until it was slowly pulled open by a girl Dean barely recognised but knew her face from school. Balthazar however seemed to know who she was and pulled her into hug, Dean stood awkwardly watching the party going on around him and admiring Cas’ house. It was huge. This left Dean feeling completely inadequate and he was seriously thinking of making up an excuse and leaving. That was until Dean was grabbed by Anna who was now dragging him towards the stairs.

“HEY, GREAT YOU CAME!” she shouted over the music.

“YEAH, PLANS CHANGED. WHERE ARE WE GOING?” Dean replied as they walked up the stairs.

“CAS’ ROOM, SO YOU CAN DUMP YOUR COAT” she informed him. Well that makes sense considering Dean just got into the house but he was already uncomfortably hot and the mix of people in the house, alcohol and possibly some terrible dancing would just lead to him boiling if he kept his jacket on. “Here you go” She pulled him into a hug and pointed at the door Dean assumed was Cas’ room. “Cas is downstairs somewhere, you should go find him” she winked and then left him. That was kinda weird but well it was already Dean’s plan so oh well, he pushed open Cas’ door and walked into his room. He felt as though he was intruding being in Cas’ room alone when he hadn’t even seen the guy yet but if everyone else was putting their stuff here Dean supposed it must be fine.

 Except there were no other things that looked like they didn’t belong to Cas, feeling even more uncomfortable Dean threw down his coat on Cas bed and stripped off his jumper placing it on his coat. Left in his plaid shirt, jeans and a terrible feeling he was about to be caught even though he was doing nothing wrong, Dean walked out of Cas room happy to see there was no-one upstairs to see him. He jogged down the stairs and decided to head towards the kitchen to get a drink. That’s where he saw Cas apparently mixing some concoction of alcohol. Dean walked over to him and was greeted with a bright smile and a happy “Hello Dean”.

Dressed in a button down white shirt and jeans Cas looked delectable to Dean. “Hey, Cas. What you making?” Cas laughed and handed the bizarre coloured drink to Dean.

“It’s a drink for you, you have some catching up to do” he explained

“Catching up? You’re not even slightly drunk” Dean pointed out

“It’s not me you have to catch up with. I don’t really drink” Castiel swirled the drink temptingly

“Fine then” Dean took the drink from Cas’ hand and smelt it. It smelt strongly of liquor and not particularly pleasant but hell it was a party and Dean didn’t have anyone to look after so why not. He raised the glass in toast to Cas and then put it to his lips downing the whole thing in three gulps.

“Holy crap, Cas!” Dean spluttered grabbing Castiel’s arm as the burning sensation in his throat passed. “I think I’m all caught up, that was some pretty lethal stuff” Cas grabbed Dean’s hand and pulled towards the sitting room where the furniture had been pushed to the sides to create a dance floor. Dean saw Anna, Meg and Balthazar dancing in the middle and Dean rerouted Cas and him until they had joined them. Dean was right there was some terrible dancing going on, turns out Castiel was an incredibly bad dancer. Dean spent half the time doubled over just laughing at Cas before he decided to give him some tips, he placed his hands on Cas’ hips and showed him how to swing them. He then moved his hands to take Cas’ wrist and showed him how to move them. He was suddenly standing directly in front of Cas a hair away from rubbing against him an idea becoming far too tempting in Deans mind.

He dropped Cas wrists and took a small step back, now that Cas knew a couple of basic ways to move he looked enticing. Dean could just reach out and woah dangerous train of thought, Dean mentally shook himself and decided a moment away from Cas would be best, he walked past him but stopped when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

“WHERE?” Cas shouted questioningly

“BATHROOM!” Dean replied gesturing behind him. That’s when Dean realised he had no idea where the bathroom was. It must have shown on his face because Cas grabbed his hand and started to lead him towards the stairs. Dean just followed, what other choice did he have? Although the whole point was to get a minute away from Cas so he could splash some ice cold water on his face but I guess sometimes God has other plans. He pulled him up the stair back towards his room, Deans mind whirred as Cas opened the door and pulled him in. Dean’s heart started racing and his palms began sweating.

Cas dropped his hand “Use the en suite, there’s a queue down stairs” Dean’s brain snapped into place and he felt  like an idiot, he looked down at his feet to hide the embarrassed blush that now covered his face and then walked into the bathroom. He looked in the mirror

“For god sake, Dean! Pull yourself together. You don’t even know if he likes men” He splashed water on his face and since he was there quickly peed. Splashing his face one last time just in case and washing his hands Dean walked back out to find Cas sitting cross legged on the floor with his back on his bed. Dean sat down next to him with his legs out stretched and lay his head down on the bed. “Damn Cas that drink really was lethal, I’m feeling pretty buzzed” Dean told him closing his eyes. Cas laughed but to Dean it was a laugh void of any happiness, one Dean had heard fall from his own lips too many times. It sounded even worse coming from Cas and Dean decided in that moment that he would do whatever it takes to make sure he never hears that again.

“It’s just nice to have someone to drink with” Dean opened his eyes at that, he pulled his legs up and turned to face Cas throwing one arm on the bed.

“What do you mean? There is a whole house full of people down there” Dean asked in his confusion.

“Yes Dean but none of them like me. I was only there because you were going to be” Cas replied reflecting Deans sitting position.   

“That can’t be true. How could anyone not like you, you’re… well you” Dean said waving his hand theatrically at Castiel.

“Dean, everyone dislikes me because… well for reasons. Okay” he said looking down at a piece of fluff he was playing with on the floor.

“No that is not okay Cas. Tell me why, tell me how anyone could not like you” he asked putting his hand over Castiel’s.

“I can’t Dean, I just met you. If you left me too I’d be devastated” They sat in silence but Dean thought he had to find out what it was, it was the only way to convince Cas that Dean was going to be his friend for as long as he could. He couldn’t say what it was but he really liked the guy for more than just his incredible looks. He sat admiring Cas’ looks as an idea formed in his mind. He really must be drunk this is not a conversation he’d ever instigate.

“You’re afraid I’ll leave you Castiel, I can’t promise you I’ll never have to leave because we jump around a lot with my dad but I can promise you I won’t ever leave because of you.” Dean waited until he was certain Cas was giving him his full attention before he started.

“It’s obviously something you’re afraid to tell, but I don’t want you to be scared and since I’m more drunk than I thought right now I’ll tell you my story. When I was four years old there was a fire in our house, it started in Sammy’s nursery some electrical fault and my mum…” Dean chocked up the way he always did telling this story. It was his worst memory he can still smell the smoke and hear his mother’s screams he hated these memories. Talking about his mum was hard but Dean could manage when it was stories of their trips to the park or the pies she used to bake but Dean would do this because now he felt he had to, to help Cas.

“My mum ran in to save him, she managed to get him from his crib and pass him to my dad who ran to help. He turned and put Sam in my arms he told me to run outside, he screamed at me to go. Eventually I did, I stood outside waiting for my mum and dad to climb out… but when I finally saw a figure it was just one, my dad came out on his own. He took Sam from me and pulled me into his arms. I screamed for mum I screamed until the firemen came, until my throat was hoarse and then I kept screaming until I passed out from exhaustion. I screamed so much I thought I never would again but I was wrong I woke up screaming most nights, reliving the whole experience again and again. I still do sometimes”

Dean risked a look at Cas not realising he had stopped looking at him. Cas didn’t say anything but Dean saw the pained look on his face he took a few breaths and continued. “My dad came to check on me the first couple of times and he held me as I cried but eventually he just stopped checking, he grew pretty distant after that. Found comfort at the bottom of a bottle, he tried but I basically raised Sammy myself that’s why we’re so close. We moved around a lot after the fire, we could have rebuilt the house but I think it was too much pain for dad so instead we moved but where ever we went it never felt like home to him so we’d have to move or he’d get into trouble and we’d have to go. It’s been like that most of my life which is why I can’t promise that I won’t have to leave but I swear to you Castiel, you could never do anything to make me go.”

Dean finished his story and stared at Cas they sat in silence as Castiel absorbed the story. An awkward feeling began spreading through Dean, he knew it he shouldn’t have dumped all this crap on Cas. That was an awful idea. Dean looked away from Cas annoyed at himself for doing this. He looked at his hand and was shocked to see Cas was holding it, when did that happen? Dean didn’t remember Cas turning his hand to hold it and Dean was holding Cas’ back he almost missed when Cas spoke staring so intently at their entwined hands.

“I’m so sorry that happened to you Dean. It must have been hard for you to tell me that, so I shall share with you what you want to know” Cas glanced at their hands and a look of confusion brushed his face before he turned back to Dean and began his story.

“Before I launch into it I need to tell you I’m gay” Cas halted possibly trying to gauge Dean’s expression. Honestly Dean had no idea what expression he had, he was totally shocked not because Cas was gay, although that was a surprise, but because a guy Dean is potentially into is not only gay but actually admitting it. Cas was still looking at Dean, crap he was waiting for a response.

“Oh hey Cas, that’s fine by me I mean err, I’m kinda into both” Dean admitted rubbing his neck with his free hand, the other still lay holding on top of Cas’” It was now Dean’s turn to guess what Cas was thinking he seemed only briefly shocked.

“Oh, okay then, to my story. It was the one other party I’d ever attended Anna had dragged me along because our parents thought I needed to get out more. We were at the party and I had left Anna to go to the bathroom and when I was in there I heard these guys talking. They were talking about Anna apparently she had refused them when they showed interest towards her, they said she was just playing hard to get. They were going wait until she had more to drink and then show her what she was missing-”

“They were gonna try rape her?” Dean asked outraged

“That’s what it sounded like to me and there was no way I was going to let that happen, I was so angry! I slammed the door open and punched one of the guys. I was enraged and they started to fight back one of them grabbed me I managed to push him off but he fell down the stairs and hit his head. He was in a coma for a week and had a leg broken in two places and a dislocated shoulder. When I told people what happened no-one believed that I was protecting my sister and of course the bastards denied everything and lied about why I attacked them. Anna tried to tell people they had come on to her and that I wouldn’t lie but of course everyone sided with the jocks and I became the freak with anger problems. All my friends were suddenly scared of me, even the ones who knew me my whole life just made excuses and left me.”

“Cas I believe you completely, but I don’t understand what does you being gay have to do with it?” Dean squeezed Cas hand to encourage him to continue.

“They completely twisted it, said I was coming on to one of them and when he refused me I got violent. Of course the other verified it and people believed them they couldn’t understand how I wouldn’t be attracted to them. I suddenly became this homosexual predator and now everyone just avoids me.” Cas finished up his story clearly waiting for Dean to get up and leave. Instead Dean pulled Cas forward into a hug, his shock at the action was obvious but Dean just held him tighter. Dean felt as Castiel relaxed and thought about everything he’d just heard. How could anyone believe that! Dean had only known Cas for three days and he just knew he wasn’t like that. He just knew it! 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm still so shocked you are actually enjoying my story, thank you so much for reading it and for your support. If you have any questions or want to comment please feel free to do so either in the comments below or at my tumblr: allkindsofcrazythings


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Cas opened his eyes the next morning he was met by bright green ones staring back at him. He blinked a few times unsure if he was really seeing that or if it was an image left over from a dream he’d had. However as Castiel became more awake he knew it wasn’t a dream and he knew this because Dean’s face was so close to his, he could feel the soft puffs of air hit his face as he breathed, he could see the speckles of different shades of green in his eyes, he could count each individual freckle but most importantly he knew it wasn’t a dream because he could feel Dean’s feet pushed up against his leg and he could feel Dean’s hand as it held on loosely to Castiel’s.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hearts_reflection is awesome and you guys should go read her new fic Which Witch Is Which.
> 
> Super huge thanks to tumblr user sanityslayer for being my editor, motivator and muse. Thank you!
> 
> I hope you enjoy this chapter.
> 
> ill_interrogate_the_cat_castiel I apologise, I had planned to update much quicker than I have but life intervened and I didn't have as much time as thought but I hope you enjoy it anyway :)

They sat like that not moving until the door was suddenly forcefully pushed open, they jumped apart in the moment of surprise. Some boy Dean didn’t know stumbled forward holding hands with a girl tucked slightly behind him. They were clearly looking for a vacant room.

“Looks like this rooms taken, the predator strikes again. I’d be careful if I were you mate” he said staring Dean in the eye. Dean saw red he knew this guy was obviously drunk and not one of the people from Cas’ story but that was all Dean could see and under the influence himself and having just heard Cas’ story, he felt very angry.

“What did you say?” Dean asked getting into the guys face the girl sensed something coming and ran off down the hall.

“I said the predator strikes again. You have to be careful with his sort” the man replied only reddening the tint to everything Dean saw. Full of anger and without thinking Dean threw forward his fist until it connected with the guy’s cheek. Dean was a fairly experienced fighter being the new kid meant he learnt the hard way but the drink Cas made him was messing with senses and Dean wasn’t on full form, that’s how he ended up smacked in the jaw and lying on the ground. The rest was blurred but Dean was sure he heard Cas shouting and then thought he saw him grab the still unknown boy by the collar and push him out and up against the other wall. Dean’s eyes closed and didn’t open again until there were soft hands holding his head and a sweet, comforting voice calling his name.

“Dean come on get up and get on the bed, you hit your head when you fell. It’s not a serious injury there is no blood but we are just going to get you checked anyway. Come lie down but don’t fall asleep just yet ok.” Dean heard from the same comforting voice that had called his name.

“ ‘m really sorry Cas, didn’t mean to get violent but was angry they’d say that bout you.” Dean mumbled. Damn his jaw hurt when he spoke. He was dropped on a surface with a slight bounce, oh a bed. It must be a bed. He opened his eyes unsure of when he closed him and saw Cas face above him then his eyes closed again and he was drifting into sleep which for some reason felt wrong.

There was a disturbance and Dean opened his eyes to see Castiel gathering things. “Cas, what’re you doing?” he asked, his throat dry and in need of water.

“Shh just go back to sleep, I’m just getting some pyjamas and I’ll be in the spare room next door if you need anything” he said heading towards the door.

“Wait! Cas, I’m not kicking you from you’re bed. I should take the spare…” Dean began getting up but he gave up when hands on his shoulders pushed him back down, then Cas pulled the duvet up to cover him. The door opened again and Dean stiffened not relaxing until he realised it was Anna.

“Hey Cassie, you were going to sleep next door right?” Anna asked and Cas just nodded in response. “Well people have passed out in there. Sofa’s still free though” she explained and then left.

“No, Cas, don’t sleep on the sofa. It’s a huge bed, we can share” Dean said taking Cas wrist and pulling him gently to emphasise his point. There was silence for a moment and Dean was mostly asleep when Castiel finally said

“Okay Dean, we’ll share.” It fell silent again except for the sound of soft shuffling. There was a coolness that hit Dean as the duvet moved and mattress lowered slightly as Cas crawled in. Dean waited a few moments until Cas’ breath evened out and opened his eyes slightly and saw Cas lying there, eyes shut the pain of the night washed away as he slept. Dean couldn’t help himself he leaned forward and ghosted a kiss on Cas lips before quietly whispering

“Goodnight Cas” and closed his eyes to hopefully drift into an uninterrupted sleep when he heard faintly

“Goodnight Dean” Dean’s eyes flung open in shock but he saw no indication that Cas had said anything, his eyes were still shut and he still looked fast asleep. Dean once again closed his eyes and fell asleep thinking he imagined Cas saying goodnight.

~Cas POV~

When Cas opened his eyes the next morning he was met by bright green ones staring back at him. He blinked a few times unsure if he was really seeing that or if it was an image left over from a dream he’d had. However as Castiel became more awake he knew it wasn’t a dream and he knew this because Dean’s face was so close to his, he could feel the soft puffs of air hit his face as he breathed, he could see the speckles of different shades of green in his eyes, he could count each individual freckle but most importantly he knew it wasn’t a dream because he could feel Dean’s feet pushed up against his leg and he could feel Dean’s hand as it held on loosely to Castiel’s.

As the last hint of sleep daze left him the reality of the situation hit him. Dean was laying in his bed incredibly close to him their hands lay entwined between their chests. Cas’ eyes fluttered down to glance at their hands unsure if his senses were deceiving him or not. As his eyes shifted back to Dean he saw a discomfort on the other man’s face.

“Good morning Cas” was all Dean said as he shifted slightly although never losing any physical contact with Castiel.

“Hello Dean” Cas responded completely unsure of how to act. He remembered he should probably enquire after Dean’s injuries and asked him about his jaw and head.

“Oh they’re not so bad my jaw kinda hurts and I think it’s bruised, my heads a bit tender but a couple aspirin and I’ll be fine, honestly I’ve had worse”

“Well Michael came back last night unexpectedly, he’s a doctor, so we had him look you over and he declared you safe to sleep so I do not think there will be any lasting damage” Cas smiled at Dean who chortled a laugh. “We’re going to have a fun time explaining things to him though. I’m not looking forward to that”

“He can’t be too bad, can he?” Cas gave Dean a look, although he admired his optimism he knew that with Michael it could be pretty bad. “Well fuck Cas that look isn’t very comforting, should I just jump out the window” Cas had to laugh at that but before he could even respond Dean continued

“Seriously though, we can face it together” he finished by squeezing the hand he was holding. As strange as it was it gave Cas such comfort that he simply squeezed back.

“Or” Dean continued “we can run to my house?” he asked. A rebellious hope surged through Cas.

“I like that plan, can I shower at yours?” Cas answered throwing his covers off and finally letting go of Dean’s hand he grabbed a bag and started putting things in it.

“Sure you can Cas” Dean said pulling the covers back over him.

“Oh no you don’t” Cas called jumping on his bed and ripping the cover from Dean. Perhaps wrestling was a better description as Dean was adamant he would not let go “Dean! Come on we have to go now!” Castiel finally managed to pull Dean out of the bed but somehow they all ended up tangled on the floor.

“Wow Cas that’s one way to get me out of bed, could have been a softer landing though” He exclaimed rubbing his butt.

“That wasn’t part of my plan, effective though” Cas replied untangling himself, he picked up his duvet and threw it on his bed then moved around to the other side and bent down to find Dean’s jacket and jumper on the floor before throwing them at him along with the shoes Cas had taken off him last night.

Shouldering his bag and putting on a pair of his own shoes Cas told Dean “Come on, put on your jacket then let’s get out of here” he watched as Dean rubbed the sleep out of his eyes before pulling on his jumper and throwing his jacket over the crook of his arm.

“Lead the way” at Dean’s request Cas walked towards his door and pushed it open. He made sure no-one was around and descended down the stairs he heard voices in the kitchen and turned to make sure Dean was following him.

“Now we just run for the door” when Cas saw Dean nod in response he continued and quickly walked to the door pulling it open ushering Dean out and closing it behind him as quietly as he could. He followed Dean back to his car and climbed in.

“You are okay to drive right? After last night?” Cas asked suddenly worried maybe this wasn’t the best idea.

“Yeah, don’t worry I’m fine to drive” Cas waited as Dean looked at his phone and then started the car “Hey, I just need to pick up my little brother Sammy, that’s ok right?”

“Sure Dean as long as he won’t mind I’m in my pyjamas” Cas laughed awkwardly and Dean joined in.

“No of course he won’t mind” Cas listened as Dean told him about Sammy and how he was staying at his friend Gabriel’s so they’d have to make a slight detour. They got to Gabriel’s home in what didn’t seem like too much time, they pulled up outside and Cas sat looking out the window as Dean called his little brother to tell him they were here, Sam must have asked who because Cas heard Dean explaining how Cas was there before he hung up. A few minutes later Sam was running out the house and seeing Cas in the front dived into the back seats sitting in the middle so he could see everyone.

“Crap Dean! What happened to your face?” Sam asked immediately

“Oh that’s nothing, don’t worry about it” Dean introduced them “Sammy this is Castiel, Cas this is Sam” Sam narrowed his eyes at Dean before turning his attention to Cas.

“Hey Cast- dude are you in your pyjama’s?” Sam asked laughing slightly

“Hello Sam, I am wearing my pyjama’s unfortunately I did not have time to change” Cas chuckled looking down at what he wore “Did you have a nice time at your friends?” he politely asked

“Yeah, thanks” Sam replied before launching into stories of the night that lasted until they arrived at Dean’s house. Cas loved watching Sam and Dean interact it was so easy and care-free. Cas thought to himself he’s seen many sides to Dean so far, he’d seen him struggle with his homework and be frustrated, he’d seen him drunk and sad and then angry, he’d seen him vulnerable and injured and he’d seen dean sleepy and although Dean is adorable half asleep and a few inches from Cas’ face he had to admit to himself seeing him with Sam was his favourite. It was the interaction Dean had with Sam that caused Cas to picture him in a big house with three little kids all running around the big back yard they had.

“So Cas, want to shower first or would you prefer food then a shower?”

“I think a shower first please if that’s alright Dean?” Dean smiled in response

“Sure it is Cas, you head in the shower and me and Sammy will star on breakfast” he turned to his brother

“But Dean I’ve already had breakfast at Gabriel’s” he whined

“Oh so you won’t be wanting pancakes then?” Sam moaned at that and got out the car.

He called “Yes I want pancakes” before slamming the door. Dean laughed and got out, Cas pulled his bag back up onto his shoulder and also got out, closed the door and followed Dean as he walked into the house.

“Shower is this way” Dean led up stairs to the three rooms above. “That’s mine and Sam’s room, that one belongs to my dad and this is the bathroom” Dean told him pointing to the respective doors. Cas followed him and listened as Dean walked into the bathroom explaining how to work the shower. After Dean pointed out where the towels are he left and Cas climbed in the shower. He kept his shower as short as possible because thought of Dean standing in the same place he was now, naked, was starting to have a visible effect on Cas and that would be too embarrassing. He rushed through the process and jumped out of the shower in record timing, he dried his body and got dressed. He rubbed the towel on his hair too to try and dry it at least slightly before walking back down stairs with his bag placing it by the door and before following voices towards the kitchen.

Dean was just putting more pancakes on an already huge pile when Cas walked in, Cas could smell them and his mouth began to water he suddenly realised how hungry he was.

“Tell Sammy if you want tea or coffee and he’ll make you some, not as good as me but hey gotta let the kid try” Dean said waving the now free of pancakes spatula in the direction of Sam

“Hey jerk I make awesome tea. Don’t listen to him Cas” Sam retaliated punching his brother playfully in the arm. Hearing Sam call him Cas felt like he had some sort of acceptance from Dean’s younger brother. Silly to think really but the fact they were the only two to call him Cas brought a warmth to his heart.

“Of course you do Sammy, it’s just not as good as mine, bitch” sometime during saying this Dean had Sam in a headlock which was really rather impressive considering the size of his ‘little’ brother. “So Cas what’ll it be?”

Castiel thought for a moment before deciding “I think I’d like some tea please Sam” at Castiel’s decision Dean let his brother go who began making him some tea. “Is there nothing I can do?” Cas asked hating that he was standing idle while Sam and Dean prepared a meal that he was going to eat.

“Well take these plates and cutlery and go sit in the living room” Dean handed him the appropriate attire and Cas accepted them making his way through. He saw a coffee table and placed the plates and cutlery there before sitting on the sofa waiting for the boys to come through. He didn’t have to wait very long, it was only a few minutes before Dean walked through with a big plate of pancakes and Sam followed behind with steaming mugs.

They decided while they ate breakfast they should watch a movie. When Dean asked Cas what they should watch he told Dean he didn’t know what to pick from his collection so instead Sam should pick. They ended up watching ‘Braveheart’ Cas had never seen it before but Dean and Sam both said it was an enjoyable film. As they sat and watched the film Cas found it strange that an American film industry would choose to make a film based on Scottish history, he also found it odd that the main cast did not appear Scottish. But it was still enjoyable. Cas continued watching the film, the Scottish were on a battle field facing the English and William Wallace rides down on a horse with his face painted blue as he rode down Dean jumped up off the sofa from next to Cas and Sam started laughing on the floor.

Dean picked up an umbrella from the corner of the room and held it by his side as if it was sheathed. He drew it slowly and dramatically holding it up as if it was Wallace’s sword before yelling “THEY MAY TAKE OOR LIVES BUT THEY’LL NEVER TAKE OOR FREEEEEEEDOMMMM” in what can only be described as the worst impression of a Scottish accent Cas had ever heard. He had now joined Sam in laughing hysterically at Dean’s impression. Once he was finished yelling he charged at Cas and landed on the sofa next him in a fit of laughter and dropped the umbrella on the floor. They crashed together and leaned on one another as Dean’s added weight to the sofa shifted Cas’ unstable position. The rest of the movie passed the same way, Dean copying quotes every now and then with his terrible accent.

When the film finally finished Cas ensured Dean “that was wonderful, Sam a good choice. It provided much entertainment” Cas still found himself laughing when he thought of Dean’s impressions.

“Oh Cas, this is just the beginning” Dean promised as he moved over to pick the next film to watch.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Dean, what film are we watching now?” Cas asked. Dean looked over to Cas and smiled at him
> 
> “Well, Cas, that depends how much time do you have?” Dean checked his watched “It’s only half eleven, gee how early were we up?”
> 
> “I don’t have any plans for today and don’t particularly want to go home, so the day is yours” Dean saw a slight blush on Cas’ cheeks and wondered what implications that comment had for him. Dean hadn’t realised he was staring until Sam started laughing and badly attempted to hide it behind a cough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hearts_reflection is awesome and you guys should go read her new fic Which Witch Is Which.
> 
> Super huge thanks to tumblr user sanityslayer for being my editor, motivator and muse. Thank you!

“Dean, what film are we watching now?” Cas asked. Dean looked over to Cas and smiled at him

“Well, Cas, that depends how much time do you have?” Dean checked his watched “It’s only half eleven, gee how early were we up?”

“I don’t have any plans for today and don’t particularly want to go home, so the day is yours” Dean saw a slight blush on Cas’ cheeks and wondered what implications that comment had for him. Dean hadn’t realised he was staring until Sam started laughing and badly attempted to hide it behind a cough. It was Deans turn to blush, he gave Sammy a death stare and turned back to the dvd’s. He spotted The Lord of The Rings since they have time a classic is a good idea. Dean pulled it from the pile of films, took the first dvd out and popped it on. He took the cover over to Cas and tossed it to him so he could read the back.

“Oh Lord of the Rings. I haven’t seen this film either although Anna assures me it’s fantastic” Cas commented as he read the summery on the back of the dvd case.

“Well first of all Anna is right! It is fantastic and this is only the first one but it is so much more…” Dean waggled his eyebrows “… it’s the extended edition” a gruff laugh escaped Dean as he saw Cas comprehend what he had said.

“Dean, how long is this film?” he enquired moving along so Dean could sit back next to him

“About three hours” he answered a cheeky grin spreading on his face. Before Dean could start the film though Sam’s phone rang, he walked out to the hall to answer it. Dean looked at Cas confused who just shrugged. Why would Sammy go into the hall to answer the phone? It was only a few moments before Sam walked back in fear clear in his face.

“Sammy? Sammy what’s happened?” Dean immediately ran over and grabbed his brother. Sam looked Dean in the eye and gulped

“I have a date” he barely whispered. Cas stay sat on the sofa the worry that tainted his face was now gone and Dean collapsed on the floor laughing hysterically “Dean this isn’t funny. Help me!” Sam pleaded.  He wiped a tear from his eye and took a few steadying breaths.

“So you finally asked Jess and she said yes huh?” Sam just nodded still in shock. “When’s your date?” Sam managed to look down at his watch

“She’s gonna be here in ten minutes” again Sam gulped. Dean felt sorry for his little brother, he remembered being this nervous on his first date he thought of any advice he could give him. His dad never had any for him but Bobby had, it was lucky for Dean his dad had decided to go missing for a while and Bobby looked after them.

“I’m going to tell you something Uncle Bobby told me when I had my first date, ‘don’t be an idjit’ and to be honest it’s pretty much all you need to know. Just be your sweet adorable self and she won’t be able to resist” The next ten minutes were spent trying to get Sam to calm down. Dean loved how much of a help Cas was, he seemed to know exactly the right things to say which was amazing because usually Dean just blundered his way through these conversations hoping he wasn’t making it too awkward and that he said something helpful.

The doorbell rang and suddenly the 10 minutes were up. Sam, Dean and Cas all huddled at the door to see Jess standing there in a cute little summer dress she looked perfect for Sammy. Sam introduced them and Jess gave a little wave to both Dean and Cas before saying they’d better go if they’re going to catch the film. Dean made sure he did the brotherly thing and gave Sam a big embarrassing kiss and a giant hug, maybe it was the nerves or maybe it was the fact that Sammy just really like Cas and he had helped but neither him nor Dean expected Sam to hug him too. Sam and jess ran back towards her mother’s car dean waved politely at her before waving a more frantic goodbye as his baby brother left for his first ever first date.

Dean watched as the car drove away, he watched until it turned the corner and he continued to watch a short while after the car was gone. He only stopped when Cas suggested they go back inside. They took up their positions on the couch again and Dean pressed play on the remote control eventually watching the film that had been sitting there ready since Sam’s phone rang.

“Dean? Are you alright?” Cas asked tenderly

“Huh? What, yeah I’m fine Cas. I just wonder, when did my little brother get so grown up” Dean was so proud that Sammy had gotten himself a date but it was just a reminder that Sam was growing up and soon wouldn’t need Dean anymore. Dean wasn’t an idiot he knew Sam would grow up and have his own life he just didn’t expect it so soon.  Dean’s whole life was Sam what was he supposed to do when he’s gone? Rapidly clearing his head Dean tried to draw his attention back to the film playing.

“He’ll always need you Dean” Cas said quietly never looking away from the television, his hand did drifting closer to Dean’s.

“You reading my mind Cas?” was Dean’s reply which was met with a confused face

“No, Dean I can’t do that. Although I believe it would be easier if I could” the confusion in Cas’ face shifted into a more thoughtful pose.

“What d’ya mean?” Dean stared at Cas feeling slightly nervous when he turned away from the television to face him for the first time in this conversation

“Well it would make understanding last night easier, you know… the kiss” A frog suddenly found its self in Dean’s throat and good lord was he going to choke on it. Shit. Dean cleared his throat

“Listen Cas about that I… I am so sorry I did that. My head was messed up and I know that’s not an excuse but I just want you to know if I had been in a better frame of mind I’d never have taken advantage of you like that” trying to work out what Cas was thinking was impossible his expression showed nothing. Was this guy a professional poker player? If not Dean was really going to have to teach him they could clean out. 

“So you apologise for the situation the kiss occurred in but not for the kiss itself?” again Cas showed no reaction, reading him was too difficult. Dean didn’t want to apologise for the kiss but he felt bad Cas was offended

“Oh yeah, I’m sorry for that too Cas” terrified everything was going to be messed up from here on Dean stared unseeing at the TV hoping the end to their friendship would not come.

“You misunderstand me Dean I was not looking for an apology. I was just trying to find out if you regretted it or not?” Dean thought hard about what to say next. A lot was riding on it. Well Cas didn’t want an apology for the kiss so maybe he’s happy it happened, what was it Sam always said ‘honesty is the best policy’? Dean’s never really believed that but if ever there was a time to try it, he guessed it was now.

“No Cas, I don’t regret it happened. The only thing I regret is the way it happened” Dean looked back at Cas and saw a hint of a smile in his eyes. Was that the right answer had he actually gotten something right?

“So you wouldn’t be against doing it again?” at Cas words Dean’s jaw dropped. What? Cas was seriously asking this. Finally getting his jaw working again

“Are you serious Cas?” Castiel just nodded looking very shy “like right now?” Dean propositioned, again Cas nodded but this time he moved closer to Dean. Dean responded and began closing the remaining gap between them. Just before they met Cas spoke, Dean felt little puffs of air over his face as he said

“Just before we do Dean you need to know last night was… well it was my first kiss” well that was surprising to Dean, he felt even worse that that was not only their first kiss but Cas’ first kiss ever. He had a lot of making up to do and he was going to start right now.

“Don’t worry Cas, I’ll lead” With that Dean put his hand on Cas’ cheek and guided him to his own lips. Dean kept the kiss tender and affectionate the true first kiss they should have shared. It was messy and new but intimate and the best first kiss Dean ever had.  

“What do you think Cas?” dean questioned rubbing the back of Cas’ neck

“There are no words, how… how was I?” the nerves Cas felt were obvious in his voice but to Dean it simply made him more adorable.

“Cas, you’re a natural but maybe more practise is needed” Dean teased

“Well I’d need a good teacher. Do you know where I could find one?” Cas retaliated

“I know of one” Dean pulled Cas in for a peck and then settled him in by his side, they lay stretched out on the sofa together. They pretended to watch the rest of Lord of the Rings but whenever Dean caught Cas looking at him through his eyelashes he couldn’t resist but kiss him and Cas, always the eager student would kiss Dean’s neck whenever Dean wasn’t kissing him. Dean made a mention between kissing that they would be watching Lord of the Rings again when they were… less distracted.

They sat that like that together kissing every now and then long after the movie was finished and the credits rolled but neither of them noticed. They both sat happily in each other’s presence.

“So what now?” enquired Cas

“Well if you keep looking at me like that I’m going to have to kiss you again” true to his word Dean leant down and kissed Cas with one arm around Cas’ shoulders he moved the other to his back. Cas also moved his arm he dragged it up Dean’s thigh up, his back and gripped the back of his neck. Dean squealed breaking the kiss

“God dammit your hands are cold Cas” he grumbled pulling Cas’ hand away. There was a shift in Cas’ eyes that showed an evil purpose. “Cas? Wha- nooo” was all Dean had a chance to say before Cas jumped on him straddling his waist and shoving his hands up Dean’s jumper and dragging them down his chest to his stomach and around to the small of his back. Dean had a little brother he knew exactly how to retaliate in these situations and he went for it. He pushed down on Cas’ hands to keep them stuck under Dean’s back and began tickling Cas’ sides. The way he moved proved Cas was indeed ticklish, extremely so. They were lost in a fit of giggles and fun when the door slammed open.

John stumbled in clearly in a drunken state. “Dad?” Dean called. As John looked over Cas and Dean untangled themselves their previous fun forgotten. Dean knew this wouldn’t go down well, John may not hate that Dean likes guys but he definitely didn’t like when Dean acted on these feelings.

“Cas grab your bag and wait outside for me please?” Dean walked with Cas towards the door making sure he was always between Cas and John, when he was outside with his bag and away from John Dean told him

“Five minutes Cas, that’s all I need then I’ll meet you by the car” he said closing the door and turning to face his father. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter!
> 
> How are you enjoying the story so far?


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas’ head snapped up the door pulled open and Dean stepped out pulling the door closed behind him. Before Cas had a moment to think he was being pulled into Dean’s arms. He held him in such a strong grip it took Cas a while to wrangle his arms out to return the hug to Dean. He wrapped one around his back and the other he placed on Dean’s head pulling him down and into him, which is an odd position considering Dean was the taller of the two but he was the one in need of comfort and so Cas would provide it. Cas whispered to Dean “It’s ok Dean, it’s all ok. Everything is going to be ok” he hated the fact these were the words leaving his mouth they were clichéd and empty but Cas didn’t know what to say to make this better, how could he? Dean shuddered a few times stabilising his breathing.
> 
> Dean pulled away and gripped Cas by his upper arms

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Firstly I would like to apologize for long it has taken for me to update this. I didn't mean for it too take so long, time just sort of got away from me for a bit there. Hopefully updates will be more regular and quicker.  
> Secondly for those of you still sticking with this story and those who have just joined thank you for your support and bless you for reading my story. 
> 
> Please enjoy :)

Cas stood by the car twiddling with the strap on his bag. Too nervous to do anything constructive but to jumpy to simply sit and watch the world go by so Cas decided to inspect Dean’s car, he walked around it but didn’t see anything, he let his hand trace the smooth shape but his eyes stayed permanently fixed on the door separating him and Dean. He never should have left him alone but he knew Dean didn’t want him there. A confliction grew inside Cas at every passing heartbeat, should he go back in? Should he wait? His mind began buzzing he heard the muffle of raised voice and walked closer to the door. Before he reached it silence fell dropping his bag Cas moved to the door he raised his hand to push the doorknob but before he could grip it, it moved of its own accord.

Cas’ head snapped up the door pulled open and Dean stepped out pulling the door closed behind him. Before Cas had a moment to think he was being pulled into Dean’s arms. He held him in such a strong grip it took Cas a while to wrangle his arms out to return the hug to Dean. He wrapped one around his back and the other he placed on Dean’s head pulling him down and into him, which is an odd position considering Dean was the taller of the two but he was the one in need of comfort and so Cas would provide it. Cas whispered to Dean “It’s ok Dean, it’s all ok. Everything is going to be ok” he hated the fact these were the words leaving his mouth they were clichéd and empty but Cas didn’t know what to say to make this better, how could he? Dean shuddered a few times stabilising his breathing.

Dean pulled away and gripped Cas by his upper arms

“I’m ok Cas, just come on lets go” Dean dropped his arms and walked towards his car picking up Cas’ bag on his way, he threw it in the back and climbed in behind the wheel. Cas just followed he knew Dean was not ok but he wanted to get Dean as far away from here as possible.

Cas hesitantly followed dean into the car. He sat in the passenger seat and worried about what to say. Turns out he didn’t have to think that hard. Dean took Cas' hand and told him  
"I’m ok Cas. Do me a favour" Dean took back his hand and replaced it with his phone  
"Call Sammy for me and tell him I’m coming to get him" he asked pulling out of the driveway. Cas opened the contact list on Dean’s phone and selected Sam and the call option  
 _“Dean?”_  
"No Sam, it’s me Cas, Dean is driving he would like me to pass on the message that he is on his way to collect you"  
 _“What? He can't I’m still with jess. Our date isn’t over... where are we even going?”_  
"Hold on Sam" Cas covered the mouthpiece with his hand  
"Sam would like to know the destination?" Dean glanced over at him  
"Tell him Bobby’s, where is the kid"  
"Sam? You are going to Bobby’s" there was a silence at the other end of the line Castiel waited patiently.

Just as he was about to question if Sam was still there he heard Sam say “ _Can jess come? Our date is supposed to include dinner_ ” Cas relayed the question to Dean who nodded his agreement and added something about driving her home when she was sick of his little brother. Cas gave a small laugh before telling Sam Dean’s response. Finally wrangling a location from Sam Cas ended the phone call.  
"It’s probably for the best anyway, the weather looks like it’s turning" Dean commented leaning forward to better see the sky.  "Do you want me to drop you off Cas, or would you like to come along to Bobby’s and I can take you home later with Jess" he asked with hints of doubt and anticipation.

"If it's all the same and you wouldn’t mind, I'd like to stay with you" Cas saw the small smile that faintly sat on Dean’s lips and had to control the urge to lean over and kiss it.  
They sat in comfortable silence the rest of the journey.  Castiel looked out the window and watched as the clouds darkened, the wind grew in strength and it began to rain.  It seemed Dean was right the weather was turning, for the worst.

Dean pulled up outside the mall containing the closest cinema and restaurants. Standing just inside was Sam and Jess, once they saw the car Sam pulled open the door holding it for Jess. As they got closer Cas realised that Jess held Sam’s coat over her head, he smiled at the gesture. It might have been his first ever date but he seemed to be doing it all perfectly. Reaching the car Sam even pulled the door open and waited for jess to get in pushing Cas’ bag to the side before joining her. Cas turned to face them and smiled, he felt slightly unsure about what do say, should he ask after the date or not? Dean took the option away from him as he asked

“Did you both have a nice time?” they nodded enthusiastically and Jess giggled, Cas took this as a good sign that the date was indeed going well. Cas’ thoughts wandered back to his afternoon with Dean before they were disrupted. He touched his finger tips to his lips and remembered the feeling of Dean’s soft lips searching his. He caught Dean watching him from the corner of his eye, Cas smiled and turned to face Dean who looked away and gulped. It was lucky they were now on a quiet lane where not many cars passed but all the same Cas stop and sat perfectly innocently after all best not to distract the driver especially with the rain pouring like it was. Cas pondered more about how he could distract Dean later, distracted himself it took Cas a moment to realise that they were pulling up at ’Singer Auto shop’, there were parts of cars everywhere.

Cas liked it, it was perhaps a mess but it seemed homely and Dean instantly relaxed the moment they arrived. It wasn’t like Cas’ home at all, his house had to be kept clean and proper for his absent parents. Cas wondered if Dean spent many days during his childhood here and if this is where he picked up his obvious flare for cars. As Cas made the brisk run through the rain from the car to the house he imagined a younger Dean running around all the junk cars and as the imaginary Dean grew he saw begin to learn about the cars themselves and starting to fix them but in Cas’ imagination it isn’t raining in fact it’s the middle of summer and the sun is reflecting off the sheen of sweat Dean developed working hard…

“Ow” Cas walked into a door frame that wasn’t there moments before but at least now there was a porch keeping most of the rain off them. He heard a snigger and looked over to find Dean laughing, thankfully on his own suggesting Sam and Jess had not seen his embarrassing accident. Cas pouted at Dean and rubbed at his head. Dean came over and pulled Cas hand away replacing it with his own. He placed a kiss to the now reddened spot.

“There all better” Still smirking he asked “what were you thinking about?” Cas hadn’t realised he was being so obvious with his day dreaming.

“You” he whispered looking away. Dean’s smile grew.

“That’s quite a hazardous mind you have there” Dean replied teasingly brushing his hand through the Cas’ hair and leaving it to rest on the side of his face. Cas glanced at Dean but his attention was drawn to his tongue that flicked over his lips leaving a delicious slick path. Cas leant forward desperate to trace the path Dean’s tongue left with his own.

“Guys- Oh my god sorry! Sorry!” Sam frantically threw his hands over his eyes and stumbled back into the house.  A gruff voice boomed, Cas assumed it must belong to Bobby.

“Damn… I was looking forward to that. Better head in” Dean placed a polite peck on Cas’ lips and turned holding the door open so Cas could enter the house. Cas grumped and moaned as he walked past Dean feeling cheated and frustrated. His mood didn’t improve until Dean whispered “later” in his ear. Perking up Cas was now more than happy to meet Bobby and just about able to forgive Sam. Joining the others in the living-room Dean made suitable introductions and everyone chatted, getting to know one another. Bobby was indeed a gruff man but he had a hidden kindness and seemed very fatherly towards Sam and Dean. Cas immediately liked this man. He took Dean and wandered out into another room. Cas wondered what they were talking about, it was probably about the bruising on Dean’s face. Come to think of it they never explained that to Jess either but she hadn’t asked, didn’t even flutter an eyelash. Cas came to the conclusion Sam must have told her and probably warned Bobby.

Dean returned alone with board games in his hand “Bobby says the tv is bust so, we’re stuck with these” Dean rattled the boxes for emphasis “Monopoly first?” the group nodded it seemed a good place to start.

After much laughing and grumbling Cas was eventually crowned winner of Monopoly, however lost spectacularly at the card games. That was until they played poker, Dean seemed very happy teaching Cas the rules, he had a basic knowledge but not enough to efficiently play. Cas had to admit it was enjoyable watching the others trying to see behind Cas’ natural poker face. Dean was surprisingly good at it, not good enough to win but good enough that Cas wondered how he noticed the sly differences in his face. People rarely did.

That was another thing Cas couldn’t get over, the way Dean noticed him completely. They passed a few more hours of game playing before Bobby came back through.

“Kids better call your folks, looks like you’ll be bunking here tonight. Path is completely flooded with the storm, nothing is getting in or out and the storm ain’t quitin’ anytime soon” Bobby tossed Jess his phone so she could call first. She didn’t seem too put out at having to stay. Cas wasn’t either, in fact he was incredibly pleased. He didn’t want to go home and face Michael anyway and now he had an excuse and it came with spending another night with Dean. Yes Cas was very happy the storm stayed.

Cas waited patiently for his turn to call. It may be a dick move but he was going to call Anna and tell her rather than Michael. When Jessica’s parents insisted they must talk to Mr Singer Cas decided to try call Anna with his cell. Patting down his pockets Cas realised he must have left it in his bag which was currently residing in Dean’s car.  Cas tapped Dean on the shoulder. “Dean I require my bag from your car, it has my phone in it” Cas stood up showing his intent to go and get it. With slight mumbled profanity and a glare from Bobby Dean eventually rose and joined Cas. As they reached the door a grin spread across Dean’s face.

“Dean? Why are you grinning? You were so reluctant a moment ago?” Cas asked curiously. Dean’s smile widened

“let’s just say I know the real reason you brought me here Cas” Confusion made itself known on Cas’ face. What on earth could Dean mean? Through the door and now standing under the porch Cas heard the subtle click of the door locking. He turned around to ask Dean what he had meant but before a word had left his mouth lips were on his.

Surprise swam through Castiel, before he could catch up with what was happening Cas was spun and pushed up against the walls of the house. The hard surface dug into Cas’ back but he didn't feel any pain all he could feel were Dean’s lips searching, adventuring deeper. With his mind catching up and his breath almost gone Cas pushed Dean from him. They both gasped and pain and confusion flickered across Dean’s face. With one final gulp of air Cas snaked one hand around Deans neck and the under his arm resting on his back. With a hooded gaze Cas pulled Dean forward once more binding their lips. They kissed until their breath was gone again. Gasping for air Dean moved his attentions to Cas’ neck teasing at possibilities.

"I get it now" Cas said between breaths, Dean hummed his question against Cas’ neck, the vibrations making it increasingly difficult to continue. A moan escaped Cas’ lips as Deans tongue flicked over his collar bone "I really did need to get something from my ..." another flick of Deans tongue "bag though" Dean straightened up and  cupped Cas jaw.

"Oh, shoulda said Cas" Dean said, with a teasing smile tainting his lips he turned and walked out into the rain headed for the car.

"THAT DIDNT MEAN STOP" Cas helplessly called after him. Damn his mouth, it should have been doing something far better than ruining perfectly good moments.  Now Cas was just as frustrated as before but with only himself to blame. He marched out into the rain angered that Dean had both stopped and seemed to turn off so easily. In fact Dean seemed almost happy at Cas’ frustration as he joined him in the car. Game on he thought to himself, he may not have as much experience as Dean showed but he would give as good as he could get.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A quick phone call to Anna later, they were back in the house. Both soaking wet, Bobby told them to “go get a towel and change yer clothes so yer not dripping all about my house. Idjits” with a dismissive shake of his head Bobby shooed Dean and Castiel upstairs. They went into what Dean liked to think of as his bedroom. It was smaller than the one he and Sam shared at home but it was Dean’s own space and it came will a small en suite. 
> 
> Cas' shirt stuck to him with the damp Dean was more than happy with this, the material clung in a way that highlighted his muscle tone. Dragging his eyes over Cas’ appearance Dean wanted nothing more than to trace each line of his body. Cas cleared his throat. Dean had been caught leering much to Cas' amusement. He looked Dean in the eye and pulled at the hem of his top twisting slightly and pulling it over his head. It landed in a soggy pile next to his feet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has been a while in the making but I recently started a new course and now have less time to write. I promise though I have not forgotten about this story and do intend to finish it. Please bear with me and as ever enjoy this installment :)

A quick phone call to Anna later, they were back in the house. Both soaking wet, Bobby told them to “go get a towel and change yer clothes so yer not dripping all about my house. Idjits” with a dismissive shake of his head Bobby shooed Dean and Castiel upstairs. They went into what Dean liked to think of as his bedroom. It was smaller than the one he and Sam shared at home but it was Dean’s own space and it came will a small en suite. 

Cas' shirt stuck to him with the damp Dean was more than happy with this, the material clung in a way that highlighted his muscle tone. Dragging his eyes over Cas’ appearance Dean wanted nothing more than to trace each line of his body. Cas cleared his throat. Dean had been caught leering much to Cas' amusement.  He looked Dean in the eye and pulled at the hem of his top twisting slightly and pulling it over his head. It landed in a soggy pile next to his feet.

Dean took a small step forward but as he did Cas moved backwards. Dean looked at Cas worried his advance had scared him but Cas smirked back. Realisation dawned on Dean Cas wasn't offended he was playing. Dean took another small step only breaking eye contact when a water droplet fell from Cas' hair and rolled down his torso. Cas coughed and Dean looked up.

 "Can I have a towel please Dean" Cas asked. Snapping himself out of it Dean replied

"sure thing Cas" before pulling one out of the cupboard from the corner of his eye Dean saw Cas with a smug smile on his face, he clearly thought he was winning. Dean was more than happy to prove him wrong. With the towel now in hand Dean unfolded it and moved back towards Cas. He walked around behind him and placed the towel over his shoulders, before Cas could move it though Dean began rubbing the soft material across Castiel's skin.

Dean paid attention to every detail on Castiel's back. Through the towel he felt the sharp edge of Cas' shoulder blade. Once he was convinced the skin there was dry he placed a kiss on it earning a surprised gasp from Cas. Repeating the action on the other shoulder Dean sank to his knee’s to better dry the small of Cas' back.

Once it was dry Dean lifted Castiel's arm signalling for him to keep it like that and moved under it dragging his fingertips lightly over the sensitive skin of his lower back, Dean felt Cas shiver under the ticklish sensation.  He ran the material up Cas side standing as he went, Dean laced their fingers together and covered Cas' arms with the towel using his free hand to run it down his arm drying the damp that lay there. He lifted Castiel's hand and kissed the back of it before disconnecting their hands.

 Dean moved round and did the same thing to Castiel's other arm but in reverse, dropping to his knees and working the towel down Cas' side Dean noticed a thin white scar. He gently touched it and Cas froze. Leaning forward Dean placed an open mouthed kiss on the scar. 

"What happened?" Dean asked softly so as not to scare Cas.

"Michael, that is his reaction to my being homosexual" Shock reverberated through Dean; Michael had hurt Cas because he was gay. What is it with families reacting like that!? "He didn't mean to" Cas continued "he was shocked and disgusted and threw a vase, the glass smashed and cut me and soon as he saw the damage though something changed. I believe ever since he has felt remorse for his actions, while I would not say he is comfortable he no longer interferes"

Still on his knees Dean moved in front of Cas and looked him in the eye. "No-one should ever hurt you Cas" Cas' arms fell around Dean's neck and Dean leaned forward into Cas, wrapping his arms around his waist.  Dean nuzzled at Cas' stomach after a few moments then pulled away to finish drying him. He used the towel to remove the droplets of water transferred from his soaking hair.

Dean moved Cas and sat him on the edge of the bed, climbing up himself and perching behind him he placed the towel over Cas head. Cas startled as the now damp material covered his face. Gently he began massaging his scalp through the towel. He altered pressure spurred on by the happy noises Cas was making.

Lost in the sounds Dean continued working his fingers over Cas hair, until a sneeze forced him to stop and then again. Cas pulled the towel from his mostly now dry hair.

“Oh Dean, I apologise you’re still soaked through, you are going to catch a cold” Cas stood up and took Dean’s hand pulling him towards the en suite.

“You need to take a shower, it’ll warm you up” he marched Dean into the small bathroom

“Alright, alright Cas quit pulling” Dean responded pulling his shirt from his torso. His hands began undoing his trousers when he realised Cas was watching. Blushing Cas muttered

“Oh er, I’ll wait outside. Sorry” Cas turned and walked out back into the bedroom. As he passed the threshold but before he close the door Dean grabbed his wrist

“Hey Cas there should be some clothes in the drawers help yourself to anything, I won’t be long” Cas just nodded his agreement and moved so the bathroom door would now close. Dean winked at Cas and closed the door.

Turning the water on Dean stood waiting for it warm to the right temperature, once satisfied he stripped off his jeans and boxers and moved under the waters healing flow. Dean simply stood under the water until the coldness of his bones was replaced by warmth that made him realise how cold he was.

Dean thought back to all the little noises Cas had made as he had dried him, he’d carefully stored them away for future reference. Dean caught himself before his body could react physically, now was not the time, Cas was right outside and there was no way Dean could satisfy himself quietly enough that Cas wouldn’t know.

Dean lowered the temperature of the water slightly and washed his hair, when he was done and cold spread through he turned the water temperature up again to warm him up before he left the comfort of the shower. Dean looked around and cursed when he realised he hadn’t brought a towel through, all that was there was a small hand towel that would barely cover his junk. With a smirk an idea formed in Dean’s mind.  

Dean wrapped the small towel around his waist, it barely went all the way round and a visual line of flesh could be seen down one of Dean’s sides.  Brazenly Dean walked into the room that Cas was waiting in.

He almost dropped the towel as he saw Cas in his jeans, they were too long in the leg but fitted him snug in every other way. It was paired with Dean’s favourite AC/DC t-shirt, well one of them although seeing it on Cas put it to the top of Dean’s list. When his eyes finally reached Cas’ face he saw his mouth open slightly and eyes scan over Dean’s body. Dean smirked as he saw Cas step towards him, his hand outstretched as if he needs to touch Dean to confirm he’s real. He stopped just before his finger-tips could touch Dean’s torso, he looked up as if asking for permission.

“It’s ok Cas” Dean told him taking his hand and placing it on his chest. Still being damp Cas chased water droplets down his stomach and back up. He dragged his fingers up Dean’s neck until he held his chin. Slowly he moved forward and placed his lips to Dean.

Dean mentally high-fived himself this plan was going better than he imagined he just wanted Cas to be a bit shocked and ogle him shyly, he never expected this response. He used the hand not holding the towel together to hold Cas’ head to his as the kiss deepened and they walked back towards the bed.

Before they reached it Cas spun them so when they reached the bed it was Dean who fell on to it. Cas looked down as Dean lay on the bed just managing to keep his hold on his towel. With an almost animalistic look Castiel straddled Dean and their kiss continued. Dean relished the sweet taste of Cas and expert way he kissed. Forgetting his hold on the towel Dean’s hands wandered across Cas’ back, he felt through the cotton of the t-shirt the muscles of his back. After drying them earlier Dean was now quite well acquainted with their shape. He felt a hand on his thigh tugging the towel that still lay there across his groin. The friction caused Dean to groan and shiver with pleasure.

Dean looked up at Cas who was now smirking down at Dean. It was in this moment Sam bundled through the door.

“Castiel, Dean? Bo-“ Dean and Castiel’s heads both snapped towards the intrusion. “Goddamn it! Next time Bobby can get you himself!” Shielding his eyes Sam continued “anyway he wants you both downstairs” almost as an afterthought he added “clothed preferably” before leaving the room and firmly closing the door.

Dean slammed his head back on the mattress and rubbed his hands over Cas’ thighs. “We just cannot catch a break” he huffed. Cas leaned forward and seductively whispered in Dean’s ear

“better get dressed then” he nibbled slightly at Dean’s earlobe before climbing off him and the bed and leaving the room in one swift movement. Dean was left on the bed alone now cold without the warmth of Cas over him.

Grabbing a decent sized towel Dean dried the rest of his damp skin, he was mostly dry now but he finished the job. He hastily threw on clothes and left the room, looking with a wistful sigh at the rumpled bedding and lost possibilities. 

A few moments later Dean joined the rest of the gang. He found them all sat round the dining table. There was an empty seat next to Cas and Dean had no problem filling it. He sat down and looked at the meal in front of him. It was Bobby’s specialty ‘Pasta with a tomato sauce’ It was fairly simple to make.

Step one, Boil pasta until slightly undercooked. If it’s soft it’s over done and the dish is ruined.

Step two, Empty jar of tomato sauce into sauce pan. Leave to boil, when it starts to burn on the bottom of the pan its ready.

Step three, Combine both ingredients in the aforementioned steps and serve*.

*(Dish can be served with a side of slightly stale bread that technically counts as edible but has sat out just a little too long)

Used to Bobby’s cooking Dean wolfed down his meal and wasn’t surprised to find Sam had also. Cas and Jess although slightly slower in eating were working their way through it without looking disgusted. This made Dean strangely happy and he couldn’t resist holding Cas’ hand under the table. Dean saw Cas smile around a mouthful of pasta as their skin made contact.

They sat through a fairly pleasant dinner. Standard of cooking aside the room was filled with chatter and laughter. It was a proper family meal that everyone seemed to be enjoying. No shouting, no smashing of plates and no-one storming out into the night. It was an uncommon but very enjoyable experience for Dean.

It wasn’t until a while later when they realised that a good few hours had past and Bobby wanted them to settle and get ready for bed.

“Dean, Sam you boys let your friends stay in your rooms and you two can kip on the sofas” Dean and Sam both agreed with Bobby although Dean was a little upset at having to be separated from Cas. They all got ready for bed, luckily Bobby was somewhat of a hoarder and had a dozen spare toothbrushes from hotels he stayed at when he travelled around for work.

Whilst brushing his teeth Dean looked in the mirror at his bruised face, he’d almost forgotten it was there. Cas finished brushing his teeth and rinsed his toothbrush before placing it in the cup next to the sink, he moved over and gently kissed the bruise that covered Dean’s face.

“Thanks Cas, will you be okay up here yeah?” Dean asked

“Yes, thank you Dean. This should be more than satisfactory” Cas gestured towards the bedroom. Dean kissed Cas’ forehead and left Cas to settle into his bed for the night. He wandered down stairs and found pillows and a blanket sitting on his designated sofa.

Sam told Dean “Bobby brought them down for us” Dean nodded and pushed the pillow into a suitable position before lying down and pulling the blanket over him. Sam and Dean chatted for a while neither of them ready to sleep. Well Sam chatted and Dean listened to him talk about Jessica. As the conversation continued the storm seemed to intensify it wasn’t just wind and rain anymore now there was thunder and lightning, it set Dean on edge and even Sam sat up uncomfortable at the ferocious nature of the storm. “I think I’ll go and check Jess is ok” he said. Dean laughed slightly but it was lost in another clap of thunder and at the flash of lightning Sam was gone.

On his own Dean felt even more uncomfortable he began to wonder how Cas was feeling, Dean didn’t know how Cas felt about storms and wished he’d thought to ask. He was brought from his thoughts from a small “Dean?” It was Castiel, he was at the bottom of the steps. “Is it ok if I stay down here with you for a while?”

Dean shuffled along on the sofa “Of course you can” the sofa wouldn’t be perfectly comfortable for two but they could manage if they lay close to each other, which Dean was fine with. Cas walked over and joined Dean on the sofa, he lay between the sofa back and Dean’s side. Dean wrapped the blanket around Cas and placed an arm around his neck. Cas snuggled in and buried closer when thunder rumbled and lightning flashed.

“It’s ok Cas. I’ll make sure everything is ok” Dean soothed as he thread his fingers through Cas’ hair. They stayed like that for a while, not talking, just breathing and comforting each other with small touches. As time passed Castiel seemed to relax as his breathing slowed and instead of small touches his palm lay flat on Dean’s chest. He’d fallen asleep. Dean pressed a small kiss into Cas’ hair and began himself to give into sleep. Before sleep claimed him he realised Sammy hadn’t come back down from checking on Jess and a small smile crept onto his face. With Cas’ in his arms Dean fell asleep despite the storm that continued to rage outside. 


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Feeling around Cas felt a body next to him, fear ran through him before logic clicked in and Castiel realised that it was just Dean, his Dean, in their bed and in their house. Relief flooded him as he settled back down pulling Dean closer, he took in Dean's smell and huffed happily.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well here is the next chapter, I hope you don't feel like you had to wait too long for it. I'm not sure when the next one will be up but thank you for being patient, understanding and for reading my story. Also thank you! thank you! to everyone who left Kudos or a comment it means the world to me. I hope you enjoy this chapter :)

Feeling around Cas felt a body next to him, fear ran through him before logic clicked in and Castiel realised that it was just Dean, his Dean, in their bed and in their house. Relief flooded him as he settled back down pulling Dean closer, he took in Dean's smell and huffed happily.  In the car rock music played as Dean drove along the unnaturally bumpy road. Castiel began feeling uncomfortable as the bumping continued; things were falling around the car and quite painfully hitting him. There was a loud scream and a thump! Castiel awoke, the dream scream still ringing in his ears. No he could still hear it. It came to a sudden stop. As a cold air brushed him Castiel realised Dean was missing.  Panicking slightly he peaked over the sofa edge and saw Dean lying on his back the blanket twisted around him, his eyes open and a fearful look on his face.   
"Dean?" Cas asked hesitantly  
"Yeah Cas?" Dean breathed.  
"Are... are you alright?   
"Yeah, Cas" he answered. Castiel watched as Dean untangled himself from the blanket and walked into the kitchen. Castiel looked around the empty room unsure what to do a long second later Cas decided the best course of action was to follow Dean. When he reached the kitchen he heard the kettle bubbling and saw Dean leaning against the worktop pinching his eyes. Castiel halted at the scene now feeling like an intruder in Dean's personal moment. He thought about sneaking back and pretending he never saw anything but that plan was ruined as Dean looked up.

"Coffee?" He asked.   
"That depends what time is it?" Dean looked at the oven clock

 "Its 10 to 5" Dean looked frustrated as he read the time.

"In that case, coffee would be very much appreciated" he answered covering his mouth as he stifled a yawn. A small ‘pop’ echoed from the kettle and Cas watched as Dean fumbled around getting cups and the coffee, he poured the hot water first and then added milk. He pointed to the sugar bowl in question but Cas shook head, it was too late… early for sugar. Dean passed him the steaming mug and they both sat at the dining table. A silence nestled around them.

Castiel thought about what to say, the whole time it took him to drink his coffee he thought about what to say. As he downed the last drops of the now warm drink Cas asked Dean who hadn’t looked up from his drink

“Dean? What did you dream about?” his head snapped up

“I don’t wanna talk about it” He looked back down. Undeterred Cas placed his hand over Dean’s and at the same time said

“But-“

“No Cas!” Dean ripped his hand away and stood up at the same time, his chair toppled backwards and the mug he was holding flew onto the floor, shattering. Dean looked at the mess and took a final look at Castiel before leaving the room. Cas sat and listened, he heard the storm get louder as the door opened and banged shut. Dean had left. Castiel looked at the mess, stood up and walked over to the fallen chair. He righted it and then looked for a cloth. Finding one beside the sink Cas dropped to his hands and knees and began dabbing up the coffee spilling from the shards of broken porcelain. He began picking pieces up when footsteps sounded on the stairs, moments later Bobby appeared.

“Castiel? What’s happened?” He looked around “Where’s Dean?” Castiel answered, his voice breaking slightly

“I’m afraid I don’t know, I think he left” Castiel stood, guilt slamming into him, he should never have pushed Dean. He fell back slightly and felt the jagged edge of a mug segment plunge into his heel. “Oh” escaped Cas’ mouth as he lifted his leg and watched the blood trickle down the sole of his foot.

“Damn, kid. Go take a seat, I’ll bring the first aid box” Bobby told Castiel. Carefully he hobbled over and sank onto the sofa. Bobby appeared seconds later with a basin, a cloth and a small green box. He placed the basin on the floor with the cloth hanging over the edge and put the green box down next to it.

“Can I see?” Bobby tenderly asked. Cas just offered him his foot. He thought about Bobby as he peeled off his sock, he was so careful and… fatherly. He felt a slight pull as Bobby tugged out the mug shard, Castiel sat as he washed and bandaged his wound. He heard Bobby say the cut wasn’t too deep although don’t be running any marathons in the next couple days. He tapped Cas’ knee and said

“Get some sleep” He walked back towards the kitchen taking the basin, cloth and first aid kit with him, he stopped before the door and turned to say

 “that idjit’ll be back by the time you wake up”. Disbelieving Castiel pulled the cover over himself as he lay back down, he heard Bobby continuing to clean up the rest of the broken mess Castiel had caused and was surrounded by the scent of Dean as he closed his eyes and replayed the whole disaster many times.  

Morning came and Cas woke up to the sound of voices. After Dean had left he only had about an hours sleep overall, he was just too uncomfortable. He sat up and located where the voices were coming from, the kitchen. Still in a sleepy haze Castiel couldn’t define the voices and he felt his heart rate increase. Was it Dean? Was he back? Throwing the covers off him Cas stood and began to run towards the kitchen. “Ahhhh” fell from his mouth as he applied pressure to his earlier injured foot. Adapting to a hopping limping hybrid Castiel made his way to the kitchen.

When he got there his heart stopped beating as disappointment flooded his veins the only people he could see was Bobby, Sam and Jess. His face sunk as Cas sat in one of the kitchen chairs, the one he sat in last night when he spoke to Dean.  Feeling suddenly nauseated Castiel declined Bobby’s offer of breakfast but did accept the mug of coffee Sam handed him.

“So he hasn’t been back…?” Cas tentatively asked

“Not yet, but don’t worry. Dean does this sometimes he’ll be back soon” Sam replied but Cas caught the look he gave Bobby the look that said he didn’t believe what he was saying.

“Has anyone phoned him?” he asked hopeful that someone had at least spoken to him since the fight.

“Yeah, but he didn’t answer… probably because he’s driving” Sam told the room. Fear burst through Castiel.

“He took his car!? He’s driving in this storm?!” Cas stood up and hobbled back to the living room, he sat himself at one of the big windows Bobby had that looked out onto where the impala used to sit. Cas sat and stared. He watched the winds slowly die and the rain stop. The storm was ending. He was vaguely aware that people were bringing him things but Castiel just sat and stared out the window worrying that Dean was in trouble.

A gentle tap on his shoulder and Cas turned, Sam was standing there a sad look on his face.

“Bobby says the roads clear enough to leave now Cas. He’s gonna drive us all home” He said gently

“Oh okay, Sam” Castiel took another look out the window “but-“

“If I see him I’ll call you straight away, here put your number in my cell” Sam handed Cas the cool black block and he inserted his number. “I’ll kick his ass while I’m at it for doing this” Cas looked up at Sam and handed back his phone. Sam typed out a quick text and Castiel felt his phone vibrate. That was kind of Sam, this way Castiel could call him as well.

“No, you really shouldn’t this is all my fault” He hung his head unable to meet Sam’s eyes. Castiel couldn’t help feeling even more guilty, he scared Dean off and now Sam was worried and he was being terribly nice, Cas just couldn’t help but feel a hundred times worse. He chased Dean off, he cause Sam to worry and yet Sam was taking care of him.

In the car journey home, Castiel sat and stared out the window looking for a black ’67 Chevy Impala, hoping to just see it pulled up on the side of the road with Dean sitting in the driver’s seat listening to some classic rock record. Just like the first time they met. It was mind boggling to Castiel that that was only four days ago. So much had change and now it was all changing again. Cas managed to scare off not only his only friend but the guy he desperately liked. Resting his head against the cold hard glass of the car window Cas thought about Dean and already the many wonderful memories they shared.

When Castiel got home he ran to his room avoiding all his siblings. He threw his bag into a corner of the room and slumped on the bed. It was a little comfort for Cas that he was still in Dean's clothes and they still smelt faintly of him. He pulled his phone from his pocket glad he'd switched it when he changed.

  
**_Dean, I'm so sorry. I never meant to push you to run away, you didn't want to tell me and I should have respected that. I'm sorry.  If you don't want to see or talk to me again I understand just please get in contact so I know you're ok. Again I’m so sorry. I hope this isn't the end for us and we can sort this out. Cas x_ **

 typing the message tears began to sting his eyes.  He quickly finished it and hit send. He lay wrapped in thoughts of dean.  After Castiel calmed himself down he looked at his phone and saw he had no reply. Nervously he pressed 'call'. Cas listened to the ringing, his heart quickening at each round   


_”Hey you've reached Dean, you obviously know what to do”_

ending the call Cas threw his phone on the bed where it bounced slightly. He groaned loudly frustration radiating through him, lying in his bed every hour or so Cas would send another text these ones were shorter though mostly just

**_I’m sorry. Cas x_ **

**_please call me Dean, Cas x_ **

as expected he didn't reply. Worry was now eating through Cas' stomach so he called Sam. Thankfully Sam answered after a couple of rings.

"Hello Sam, has Dean been in contact?"  
" _..._ "  
"Sam? are you there?"  
" _No. This is John, his father. Dean's here and both of my boys want you to leave them alone and not contact them again_."  
"Wha- no, they can't! Please Sir just let me talk to Dean and explain-"  
" _No. Don't call again_ "   
"But-"  
the call ended and Castiel was left with the end call tone ringing in his ears. Dean echoed through his brain. The only thought he could think was Dean walking out after their conversation and now he couldn't even call him. Cas lay curled in a ball on his bed his head slumped on the pillow and Dean’s shirt pulled up so it sat by his nose. It barely smelt of Dean anymore but what little smell left was a comfort. Despair caused Cas' mind to panic, but amongst the mess he realised it was Sunday. That meant tomorrow was Monday and that meant school. Dean was at school. It wasn't great but it was a chance for Castiel to just explain to Dean how sorry he is. The knot of worry and fear in Castiel's stomach lessened slightly and Cas felt confident that if he spoke to Dean he could fix this problem and they could go back to how they were and Cas could once again be happy.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> At 7am Castiel's alarm rang waking him from a restless sleep. His palm thumped down on the plastic box silencing it. Opening his eyes Castiel looked up at his ceiling, he brushed his fingers through his hair and thought about the day that lay ahead of him. Lost in his thoughts Cas went through his morning routine and got ready for school. With this came his first interaction with his sibling, Anna. She was typical Anna happy to see Cas and greeted him with a hug. At the breakfast table Anna gave Castiel a look over her bacon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ill_interrogate_the_cat_castiel i'd like to apologise, things got a bit hectic so this chapter is arriving a bit later than I said but it is here now! And hope everyone enjoys it :)
> 
> Thank you for reading!

At 7am Castiel's alarm rang waking him from a restless sleep. His palm thumped down on the plastic box silencing it. Opening his eyes Castiel looked up at his ceiling, he brushed his fingers through his hair and thought about the day that lay ahead of him. Lost in his thoughts Cas went through his morning routine and got ready for school. With this came his first interaction with his sibling, Anna. She was typical Anna happy to see Cas and greeted him with a hug. At the breakfast table Anna gave Castiel a look over her bacon.

"So, Cassie?"

"Yes Anna?"

He asked around a mouthful of toast, she just stared at him

 "what is it Anna?"

She waggled her eyebrows and in response Castiel rolled his eyes. Leaning closer Anna placed her hands on Cas’ forearm which lay casually on the table.

"So, you and Dean?"  
"I don't want to talk about it" Castiel dismissed pushing away his remaining breakfast, no longer able to stomach it.  
"Come on Cassie, tell me all about it"  
"No Anna! I told you, I don't want to talk about it" brushing her hands off Castiel stood and walked away, he saw Anna looking hurt but that was nothing to what Cas felt when he thought about  Dean. He grabbed his bag thankfully already packed and walked out the front door.

He rounded the corner and found his bike. He wasn't really in the best attire for riding but now he was pissed and need to drive that away before he talked to Dean.  Castiel pulled on his helmet, secured his bag and mounted his bike. Tearing down the drive Cas felt some of the tension lessen and began relaxing. Due to his early exit it was far too early to arrive at school so Cas drove and kept driving.

He drove until his legs were stiff. He’d driven further than he’d thought and didn’t arrive at school until the last minute. He looked around the parking lot, searching desperately for the smooth black roof of Dean’s impala. He didn’t see it, Dean wasn’t here.

Castiel sank to the ground and sat leaning against his bike, the ground was wet and the dampness spread through his jeans. Castiel didn’t care, he just sat. He sat until a misty rain fell from the sky and a wet sheen lay over him. He sat for what felt like hours but realistically was only minutes. When the final bell for class rang and Castiel was officially late. He stood up and walked to his class, math.

He arrived late, sat down and stared out the window. When asked questions Castiel didn’t respond, when his teacher demanded an answer Cas just shrugged. He wasn’t paying attention, he had no idea what he was being asked and no interest in finding out. His teacher obviously angry at him asked to see him at the end of the lesson, not wanting to talk to him he tried to sneak out at the end of class but his teacher caught him before he could.  He signalled for Castiel to sit at the opposite end of his desk.

“Castiel… what’s wrong, you’re not yourself today? You’re absent minded, rude. That’s just not like you”

Cas just sat and stared at his hands that lay connected in his lap. He didn’t want to talk about it. How could he even begin to explain?

“Castiel, you can talk to me. Is something the matter at home? I don’t want to call your parents but this is a matter of concern, you are usually such an engaged student”

Castiel’s head shot up, anger flashing through him. ‘A matter of concern’? Castiel has one off day and suddenly he’s a matter of concern. This man knew nothing.

“I know you don’t want me to burden your parents with this, catch up on the work you missed today and come in with a better attitude tomorrow and I won’t drag them into this” he said. Castiel snapped

“You have no idea. You just don’t have a clue! I just lost the one friend I’ve had in years…” the weight of Dean’s loss slammed into Castiel and he took a staggering breath.

“Kids fall out all the time, you’ll probably be best friends again tomorrow” his teacher brushed it off. He mocked Castiel’s pain and dismissed it so easily when Castiel could still feel the blood trickling from the broken cracks in his heart.

“I was drowning in loneliness and he changed that! In a matter of days he completely turned my life around and brought light into my pathetic dark existence! AND YOU MOCK ME! THAT SMALL HAPPINESS IS SUDDENLY RIPPED FROM ME” Castiel stood and slammed his hands on his teachers desk

“I’M THROWN BACK INTO THAT LONELINESS WITH OUT A CHANCE TO EXPLAIN OR ADAPT ! DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO SEE IN THE DARK WHEN THE LIGHT SUDDENLY GOES OUT SO EXCUSE ME FOR NOT GIVING A FUCK ABOUT-“ Castiel looked at the chalk board where he saw the formula for Pythagoras “PYTHAGORAS” Castiel ran towards the exit without giving his teacher a chance to say anything. He heard a crash before he slammed the door in his anger and hast to leave he must have knocked his chair over.

Out in the hall Castiel watched the rest of the students go to their next class, feeling empty and cold Castiel couldn’t face his. He couldn’t face the rest of his day, headed towards the exit intent on going home Castiel heard a booming voice he recognised immediately.

Following the sound to its source Castiel found Sam at the main office desk talking to the worker there.

“So he didn’t sign in at all?” he asked. Castiel thought it must be about Dean, who else? Lost in that thought Castiel never heard the answer but judging from Sam’s expression it was a no, he looked up and noticed Castiel, determined Sam walked towards him.

Fear sat in Castiel’s stomach, this could not go well. Sam wanted nothing more to do with Cas as did… Dean, that thought felt like swallowing knives, he felt them tear down his throat and rip at his stomach as Sam got closer.

“Hey Castiel” he said in a forlorn tone the determination now vanished. Castiel squinted at Sam.

“Hey? You’re not going to scream at me?” no Sam looked confused

“Why would I do that? I told you this thing with Dean isn’t your fault” was this all some sick game? To play with Cas? He couldn’t handle that

“Sam please don’t toy with me, your father-“

“My father? When did you talk to my dad?” Sam interrupted

“When I phoned you last night, he said you and” Cas took a deep breath

“And Dean wanted nothing more to do with me. Not that I blame either of you-“

“Castiel, I stayed at Bobby’s last night. When he dropped me off no-one was there and Bobby didn’t want to leave me alone so I picked up some clothes and left… my phone must have fallen out while I was there”

“What did he say to you?” Sam continued

“He told me both of you wanted nothing to do with me that Dean was there and I shouldn’t try to contact either of you again”

“Wait! He said Dean was there?”

Castiel nodded and Sam looked thoughtful.

“That doesn’t make sense why would Dean not text Bobby to say so?”

“You still haven’t heard from him since the night he left?” Castiel asked. Sam shook his head

“Do you have an extra helmet for your bike?”  The question caught Cas off guard, what was the relevance.

“No I… wait yes actually I have a spare in my locker”

“Go and get it. We need to talk to Bobby, this whole thing sounds way to weird. I don’t trust my dad”

“I’ll meet you at my bike” Castiel finalised and Sam nodded clasping Cas’ shoulder before tearing towards the exit.

Castiel raced to his locker, enter the combination and pulled the spare helmet from it. It was Anna’s helmet for when he sometimes gave her a lift when she didn’t want to walk or one of her friends didn’t give her a lift. It was slightly girly but would have to do. Thankfully the halls were mostly clear as people were now in their class so navigating through the stragglers was easy.

Castiel saw Sam at his bike and ran over to him, tossing him the helmet.

“Dude, is this a girls helmet?”

Pushing on his helmet Castiel replied

“Yes, it belongs to my sister. I’m afraid it’s that or nothing” Castiel pointed to straps on the helmet “You can adjust the size here” Sam reluctantly did so and put it on. With their bags stored and Castiel already straddling the bike Sam took his place and they rode away leaving school behind.

Castiel drove carefully and slowly not being used to the added weight. Sam held a firm grip on Castiel that tightened substantially whenever ever they went around a corner. When they pulled up at Bobby’s a few hours later they both sighed with relief and Sam jumped off the bike.

“That was my first time” he explained.

The front door to Bobby’s house opened and in the entry way stood Bobby.

“You had better have a good reason for not being at school boy” Bobby threatened glaring at Sam

“I do, just hear me out” Sam reasoned. Bobby stood aside gesturing for them to come in. They all congregated in the living-room and Sam asked Bobby

“Have you heard from Dean?”

“No, did the idjit not turn up at school?” he replied, Sam glanced at Castiel

“That’s the thing Bobby, Castiel called me last night and I must have dropped my phone at home because dad answered it and said that Dean was there and that him and I didn’t want anything more to do with Cas. But there is just no way Dean would be home and not tell us but why would dad lie?”

Bobby absorbed what Sam had told and then said

“Your dad came round here in the middle of the night, wanting you. I told him you were asleep and had school in the morning so I made sure he let you stay and didn’t disturb you. It got a bit heated your dad was very insistent” a worried, uncomfortable atmosphere fell heavily in the room. The feeling something was wrong pricked at the back of Castiel’s neck.

“Bobby, you don’t think dad’s done something to Dean do you?”

“Your dad is a bit of a messed up guy after your mother but he wouldn’t hurt his own kid” Bobby didn’t sound as confident in that statement as Castiel thinks he tried to.

“I’ll call him” Bobby decided he walked to his phone and dialled a number.

Sam and Cas stood nervous energy buzzing around them, they could only hear half the conversation when Bobby was on the phone.

“John, its Bobby”

“Uhuh, that kid of yours get home yet?”

“Yeah”

“How come he never let me know?”

“I am aware, but that don’t mean I don’t love him like one”

“I wasn’t keeping him from you, it was the middle of the night! Sam had school I wasn’t gonna let you drag him from his bed”

“It’s his bed when he stays here”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“John? John!” Bobby put down the phone.

“Balls!” he exclaimed at the handset. He returned to the living-room.

“Well John says Dean is home, when I asked why he didn’t call your dad went on a rant about how he ain’t my son”

Castiel saw the pain that lay behind that statement Bobby had come across as an extremely fatherly figure in the short time Cas had known him.

“Something is definitely going on, Dean would have told us he was home and John didn’t give a nearly good enough answer” Bobby looked pained as if all confidence in his earlier statement about John hurting Dean had evaporated.

“So how do we find out what?” Castiel asked. Dean might still be angry at him but there might also be something much more sinister going on and Castiel was going to help Dean.

“I think we’d better go back to the house and talk to my dad” Sam suggested

Bobby and Cas both muttered their agreement. Castiel was scared but his fear for Dean overthrew that. The three of them set out in Bobby’s truck towards Dean’s home.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean opened his eyes and looked around the space he found himself in, there was nothing he could see just darkness all around him and a cold concrete floor beneath him. His head stung and hurt and there was a faint buzzing in his ears, he’d been hit over the head. There was a small breeze that caressed his head and left a wet sticky feeling, was he bleeding? Dean tried to lift his hand to feel at his scalp but found he could only move it a centimeter or two, his wrists were bound together behind him. Realising this Dean could now feel the sharp burn of the rope against his wrist, he wriggled them to see if he could break free but it was no use, the pain doubled and Dean gave up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So it's been a while I know but finally here is the next chapter. I hope you all like it and again just thank you so much for reading and for the kind words of everyone who's commented and to those who left kudos too. Thank you all so much :) Enjoy the chapter :)

Bobby pulled up outside Sam and Dean's home and they all bundled out, leading the way Sam walked up the short garden path and pushed on the door handle. The door swung open at the pressure.   
"It should be locked" Sam told the group. He got a foot over the threshold before Bobby grabbed his arm.   
"Better let me go first" he said pulling Sam back. Bobby stepped into the main room and disappeared from Castiel's vision. He shared a nervous look with Sam before they both followed Bobby’s lead and entered the house. Castiel went first ensuring Sam was safely behind him.  
Just in the door Cas stumbled and tripped on a chair, he moved the chair so Sam wouldn't also trip and gave it a confused look. Why was there a chair in the doorway? Cas turned and took in the entirety of the room. It looked like there was an earthquake, and then a tornado and then the Hulk took a personal offense to every object in the room. It was smashed to pieces. A lump formed in Castiel's throat, this couldn't mean anything good. Hopefully Dean was in no way involved. Cas prayed Dean was in no way involved.  
"Bobby!" Sam shouted calling him to him, Castiel stumbled over too. Sam was bent down over a pile of smashed plastic- the remains of a phone.   
"It's Dean's" Sam breathed picking up the biggest chunk. Bobby held out his hand and Sam transferred the broken piece over.   
"What happened here?" Castiel questioned  
"Well either there was a burglary or -and the more likely- Dean fought with John"   
Castiel thought back to his meeting with John.  The man was drunk and Dean was adamant that they not be in the same room. After Dean spoke to John he was torn up and practically fell into Castiel's arms. A coldness spread up Cas' back causing him to shiver   
"We _have_ to find them" he turned to Sam and bobby and pleaded  
"Please think! Where would they go?" Castiel looked at Sam, he had such a lost little brother look, he was deathly pale but his eyes were red and puffy. It was another rip in Castiel's heart. In that moment Castiel made a silent promise that he would find Dean, not just for himself not even just for Dean but for Sam. In that moment Castiel adopted himself a new brother. He felt guilty pressuring Sam, the strain he was already under, Castiel’s insistence and added pressures were not good for him.

“Come on Sam, we’d better take you home” Castiel led him out to Bobby’s car. Taking one final look Bobby closed the door and joined both Sam and Castiel in the car.

***

Dean opened his eyes and looked around the space he found himself in, there was nothing he could see just darkness all around him and a cold concrete floor beneath him. His head stung and hurt and there was a faint buzzing in his ears, he’d been hit over the head. There was a small breeze that caressed his head and left a wet sticky feeling, was he bleeding? Dean tried to lift his hand to feel at his scalp but found he could only move it a centimeter or two, his wrists were bound together behind him. Realising this Dean could now feel the sharp burn of the rope against his wrist, he wriggled them to see if he could break free but it was no use, the pain doubled and Dean gave up.  He moved his attention to his legs and as he assumed they were tied at the ankle, he pulled his knees up to his chin. A cold fear swept down his back, the only reason he wasn't fully panicking was because it was his dad who had done this. Even to himself, Dean knew how messed up that sounded but his dad- no John, John had always been a shitty father to him, he’d been violent and cruel and yes this is the worst thing he has ever done but he at least knows he won’t die. John would never kill him. A horrible thought suddenly occurred to Dean.

“Sammy?” He harshly whispered

“Sammy, are you in here?” he shouted this time, his voice filling the small space. There was no answer, Dean sunk into himself. He wasn’t sure if he was relieved or more scared at the fact Sam wasn’t here with him. He hoped Sam was still at Bobby’s and that John hadn’t got to him, Bobby could protect him, one of the few who could.  Dean’s mind wondered a little more until it eventually landed on Castiel, on the hurt look on his face when Dean ran out on him. A small ache grew in Dean’s chest, now he will never get to explain. He just wanted to see Castiel at least one more time and now he never would because he was tied up in what he suspected was one of his dad’s lock ups, ironic really. A strip of light fell across Dean’s face. He hadn’t even noticed the door open, not that he could have done anything anyway. Dean squinted at the intrusive light as his eyes painfully adapted. A broad figure stepped through the widening gap and closed the door behind them sealing off the outside world.

“Dad?” Dean tempted

A switch clicked, causing a light to flicker on above them. John stared down at Dean, resolve in his eyes. He walked forward until he stood towering over Dean. He bent down and stretched his hand out to touch Dean’s cheek. Flinching Dean pulled away disgusted at his father. John moved around Dean and cut the bonds holding his hands. Immediately Dean pulls his hands in front of him and pushes away from John. His hands fly to his still bound ankles and pulls at the knots that lay there. When the ropes finally snap free Dean jumps up and runs towards the door, desperate to make his escape. He pulls on the door and his heart sinks until its being squished under his shoe. How had he not noticed the giant padlock? He pulled at it hoping against all the odds it would release but of course it didn’t his dad never made mistakes like that.

“It’s locked Dean, you’re not leaving. Not yet.”

Dean dropped his head against the door.  Heat pulsed through his body instead of blood carrying with it a bubbling anger. Dean took deep breaths squashing the anger deep inside him. It would not help to let his temper get away from him. Not after last time. It was because his temper got away from him that he was in this situation in the first place.  He turned to face his dad and looked at him properly since their fight.

“Dad, you have to let me go-“

“No Dean! You’re not leaving. Do you understand me?”

“But Dad-“John rose and threw his fist into the door inches away from Dean’s face.

“No!” he spat in Dean’s face. With him this close Dean could smell the alcohol on him, his dad stank. There would be no reasoning with him, not now.  Dean sank to the floor in a pool of hopelessness.

“One day son, you’ll understand why this had to happen” Dean snorted at John’s comment, how could he ever understand this? There was just no way, it made no sense and it was cruel.

“How dad? How am I supposed to understand this, you tore me away from Cas and you won’t explain why?”

“Tor- tore you away! Dean, that boy” he spat the words as if they were poisons in his mouth “he’s an abomination. He was corrupting you!”

“Corrupting me!? Are you mad all he did to me was like me, for who I am. He accepted me, something you can’t seem to do!” 

“Accepted you, of course he did. He made you this… this… way” John gestured wildly towards Dean.

“This way… no dad” Dean sighed, he’d never understand. That’s why only Sam knew. “I’m gay, I always have been. Long before Castiel, I could just never tell you”

“Son, you don’t have to lie to protect him”

“I’m not!” John moved forward shushing his son. Dean tensed expecting a painful blow but John just wrapped his arms around Dean in an attempted hug. Dean froze at the contact. His dad hadn’t hugged him since he was four.

“It’s ok Dean we are going to get his venomous claws out of you, one way or another.”  Dean pushed John from him.

“Dad, what do you mean?” Dean asked though fear clogged his throat, choking him.

“It’s alright Dean, everything has been set in motion. You’ll be free of him soon. I brought you some food and water to clean yourself up and there is a sofa for you to sleep on with pillows and blanket all ready for you” John gestured to some were behind a shelf. Dean stood

“Dad what do you mean ‘everything has been set in motion’?” Dean asked praying it didn’t mean what he thought it meant. John moved towards the door and unlocked the pad lock.

“Get some rest” was all John said before he was through the door and locking it again.

“DAD, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!? DAD” Dean hammered on the door, crashed against it with all his weight finally letting the anger he was feeling bubble up until he exploded. It was almost volcanic. Dean screamed with anger, frustration and fear. “DON’T YOU DARE HURT HIM YOU SON OF A BITCH. YOU HEAR ME, DON’T YOU TOUCH HIM!” Dean thrashed in a manic fashion toppling anything that got in his way. When he was finally exhausted and had nothing left to smash Dean once again sank to the floor. Breathing heavily, Dean placed his head in his hands. He had to get out! He had to save Cas. Cas was a wonderful beautiful person who deserved love and happiness and only good things. Dean couldn’t let the darkness of his life taint that. He had to get out. He had to find Cas and explain everything and save him. Dean would not be his downfall. Dean felt his heart shatter. There was no way Cas would ever want to see Dean again. Not after everything he had and was about to put him through.

“That’s ok though” Dean told himself “as long as Cas is safe” Dean could walk away. Sure it would hurt like hell. Worse than hell, quite frankly he’d take hell fire over losing Cas, having never connected with anyone like this before. It was impossible to believe they had only know each other days when to Dean it felt like a lifetime. For it to be gone as quickly as it arrived was devastating. Dean could already feel the loss of Castiel and it stung. It stabbed at him until he struggled to gain control. Tears streamed down his face and he broke. Dean stayed curled in a ball holding himself together until no more tears would come. He’d cried himself dry and stayed in that spot for hours trying to calm himself down.

Eventually Dean got up and stumbled over to the make shift bed his _loving_ father thought to make for him. He fell into it and pulled the covers right up to his chin. On the floor lying next to Dean was a small brown bear, one of Sam’s baby toys. Dean stretched an arm out and picked it up, he hugged into it like it was his brother. All of Dean’s fears for Sam came rushing back. Crushing him he gripped even tighter to the bear using it as an anchor to keep him grounded, to keep him focusing on an escape plan. Dean closed his eyes and begged for sleep, he held the teddy bear right by his heart, the place Sammy always was. It was hard in this situation for Dean to not feel the pain of his mother’s loss. She would have accepted him, she would never have let any situation end like this. Dean pined for her, he pined for Sammy and he pined for Cas. He longed for the comfort and the familiarity these people offered Dean. He wanted to cast out the uncertainty and fear of his future.

Dean settled for the worst sleep he’d ever have. Emotionally and physically exhausted staying awake wasn’t an option. Cas would be safe for today and tomorrow Dean would fix everything.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They pull up back at Bobby’s and Cas can’t help but feel a sense of relief, in the short time he’s been here this place has become almost a second home and Castiel can’t help but feel a sense of comfort. They all walk into the house, fear, worry and exhaustion obvious in their movements. The plundered on and sat at the dining table Cas stared at the empty seat that Dean had sat in only hours earlier. His absence buzzed in the silence, Cas couldn’t hear anything. No movements, no breaths, no heartbeats all he could hear was a buzzing silence left by Dean.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok here it is the next chapter! I hope you all enjoy. Massive love to everyone who reads this! Thank you so much! I really really hope you like it :)

Driving back towards their house Bobby asked

“Son where do you live, so I can drop you off?” but before Cas could even open his mouth to answer Sam was saying “No, please. Can’t Castiel come back with us?” Bobby looked at Cas in his rear-view mirror as if asking him if he wanted to. Castiel quickly turned to look at Sam and saw a pleading on his face. There was no way he could say no. Not after having just promised to look after Sam and be like a brother to him. So Castiel looked back at Bobby and again caught his gaze in the rear-view mirror and nodded his head.

“If that’s alright with you, sir?” Castiel asked.

“As long as you let your family know, I got no problem” They continued the rest of the journey in silence. All lost in their own train of thought. Castiel thought about Dean. He hoped Dean had gotten away from John and was just lying low somewhere. He even let the smallest tendril of hope sneak its way into his heart as he allowed himself to think that perhaps Dean was simply back at Bobby’s waiting for them but then that thought took a darker turn. What if John was back at Bobby’s waiting for them? Either way, at least they would finally have answers even if the thought of facing John sent a cold chill down his spine.

They pull up back at Bobby’s and Cas can’t help but feel a sense of relief, in the short time he’s been here this place has become almost a second home and Castiel can’t help but feel a sense of comfort. They all walk into the house, fear, worry and exhaustion obvious in their movements. The plundered on and sat at the dining table Cas stared at the empty seat that Dean had sat in only hours earlier. His absence buzzed in the silence, Cas couldn’t hear anything. No movements, no breaths, no heartbeats all he could hear was a buzzing silence left by Dean.

A small tap on Castiel’s shoulder brought sound back to his ears he heard a gruff voice grumble

“Pb&j then bed” now Castiel could once again hear he realised the voice belonged to Bobby and although naturally gruff there was definite tones of fatherly caring. It was this that spurred Castiel to accept the sandwich and force himself to nibble it. It tasted bland to Castiel and couldn’t eat more than a few bites. They all sat in silence eating their sandwiches until Bobby again broke it

“Call your family Cas, then to bed. For both of you” Bobby looked between Sam and Castiel until they both nodded in agreement.

They traipsed up the stairs and split at the top, Sam walking into his room without looking back and after watching him go Castiel walked towards Dean’s. He made it to the door and rested his hand against it. He took a breath and pushed it open. It was the same as the last time he saw it. Exactly the same, the bed was still slightly rumpled from where Cas had been lying in it before, when the storm hit. The night he’d gone down stairs to seek comfort in Dean. Something Castiel now greatly regrets, he hadn’t even been that scared, he could have easily survived the storm alone but he’d heard Sam go into his room and the temptation of Dean on his own was far too great.

Looking at the room now Castiel wanted to punch his past self and tell him to just go to sleep and leave Dean alone. Then none of this would have happened. The weight of his guilt crippling him Castiel crawled towards the bed he crumbled on it and smashed his face in the pillow. He could barely smell Dean on it Castiel was devastated by this; it was just another reminder that Dean wasn’t here. Surrounded by his stuff or not Cas couldn’t feel Dean, this room could belong to anyone.

Remembering he’d said to Bobby he would call his family, Castiel pulled his phone from his pocket and dialled Anna’s number.

* _Hello, you’ve reached Anna. Leave me a message I’m busy right now*_

Castiel sighed and waited for the beep.

“Hello Anna. It’s Castiel. Something’s happened” Cas took a deep breath “It’s Dean… he’s missing. I’m going to stay with Sam and Bobby, I don’t know when I’ll be back … if school calls, cover for me. Anna I could really do with hearing from you. Call me back please” Castiel ended the call just as the first tear rolled down his face. He rubbed it away and balled Dean’s duvet up to his face and then decided to burrow under it, he stayed that way for only a few moments before there was a small tap at the door and then a creak to signal it was being opened.  

When the bed moved under him Castiel finally peaked out and saw Sam perched on the edge looking at the floor.

“Sam?”

“Hey Cas. Mind if I sit in here for a while?” Of course Sam would want to sit in Dean’s room. It had been selfish of Cas to just claim it.

“Of course Sam, I’ll leave you to it” Castiel pushed the duvet off him and began climbing out the bed

“Cas please stay. I don’t want to be by myself” pushing himself back onto the bed Castiel said

“Certainly Sam” rearranging himself Castiel sat by Dean’s pillow with his legs crossed. Sam flopped back and now lay on the bed with his legs dangling off the edge.  

“We will find him won’t we?” Sam asked fear obvious in his voice

“Yes! You must believe me. We will find him and soon” Castiel tried to put as much reassurance behind every word he said. He knew they’d find Dean. They had to but fear was clouding his brain making it difficult to stay so hopeful.

Castiel pulled Dean’s pillow into his lap and wrapped his arms around it, as if doing so would allow Dean to feel his arms around him or as if it provided protection to its owner.

“I miss him, so badly” Sam whimpered

“I know you Sam and I’m certain where ever Dean is he’s missing you too and trying his hardest to get back to you” Castiel needed this to be true, he needed to believe that Dean could and was trying to get back, at least for Sam.

Sam turned to now face Castiel

“Castiel, you know this isn’t your fault right?” Castiel’s eyes widened slightly, he hadn’t expected this.

“I appreciate that Sam but-“

“No Cas, none of this is your fault. This is because my dad is a messed up guy” Sam wiped at his eyes and sat up

“You should get some sleep Cas, you can borrow some of Dean’s pyjamas I know he won’t mind”

“Thank you, I’ll grab some then head down stairs to the couch”

“No, don’t be silly. Dean would kick my ass if he thought I made you sleep on the couch when his bed was lying empty. Stay here Castiel honestly” with those final words Sam exited the room and left Cas on his own, touched by his kindness.

Castiel felt terrible going through Dean’s drawers, how could he rummage through them. It felt wrong. He wandered into the bathroom to brush his teeth, his toothbrush still being there from the last time. Seeing Dean’s sat next to it sent a stabbing pain through Castiel, he was surrounded by Dean and it comforted him but it also pained him.

After brushing his teeth Castiel splashed some water on his face, trying desperately to rub away the guilt. He felt around for a towel to dry his face and his hands landed on a soft cotton material, not a towel. Cas looked at the object in his hands, it was Dean’s top one he frequently wore by the look of it. Castiel took his own shirt off and used it to dry his face before covering his now bare torso with Dean’s shirt. As it passed over his face Castiel smelt Dean, it engulfed him and for the moment the shirt covered his face Castiel forgot. He forgot the pain Dean was going through, the pain he caused and instead could see a future where Dean and Cas shared clothes without a second thought. But then Cas pulled the shirt down from his face and the smell of Dean was gone as was the future he picture and the realness of the scenario he was in once again hit him like a ton of bricks.

Slowly Castiel made his way back into the bedroom he dropped his shirt to the floor and quickly shed his pants before climbing into the bed.

Castiel remembered the first time he found himself in Dean’s bed, he was excited and frustrated because yes he was in Dean’s bed but Dean wasn’t instead he was down stairs. Now Cas wished Dean was just down stairs instead of who knows where, where Cas couldn’t find him.

He tossed and turned catching glimpses of sleep every now and then but every time he did he was startled awake by green eyes scrunched in pain and the echo of a scream. 

He twisted and turned for what felt like hours before he decided he wasn’t going to sleep. He looked at his phone to check the time, it was midnight. Castiel lay for a minute longer before deciding he wouldn’t sleep, he threw off the covers and shoved his legs into his pants before heading downstairs.  On his way Cas stopped just outside Sam’s door, he heard the soft snores that signalled he was asleep. Good, Cas thought to himself he must have been exhausted if he was anything like Castiel continuing as quietly as possible so as not to wake Sam or Bobby Cas edged down the stairs conscious of every floorboard. When he reached the bottom he saw a light glowing from the kitchen and walked through to find Bobby sitting at the table.

He turned when Cas walked in

“Can’t sleep?” he asked. Castiel shook his head

“Nor you?” he asked in response

“Nah I was thinking of places we could look for Dean” he said turning back to face the table. Castiel walked round the other side and joined Bobby looking at the map he noticed there were red dots marking places but also crosses and circles.

“There is some coffee in the pot, pretty fresh. Help yourself” Castiel walked over to the pot and poured it in a mug he found conveniently next to it, he moved to the fridge and pulled out the milk before adding a splash and returning it.

“What do the marks mean?” Castiel inquired as he re-joined Bobby at the table.

“The red dots mark all of John’s lock-ups in the area” Bobby then pointed to the three red dots on the map. Gesturing to the crosses he said

“These are the places that John would take the boys to a lot when they were kids” Castiel looked at the map and was saddened

“Bobby, there are only two crosses and…” Castiel pointed to one of the crosses on the map “Isn’t this your house?”

“Yeah, Mary died when the boys were still pretty young and John found it difficult to be a father after that” Bobby looked at the map again

“It was worth a shot putting here on it, just in case” Castiel nodded he could see Bobby’s desperation in the fact he’d marked his own house as a potential location for Dean.

“And the circles?” Castiel asked hoping to shake Bobby from the solemn place he’s retreated to

“Those are places John visits. Majority of them being bars but there might be motels or empty buildings nearby.”

Castiel was shocked at how many places John had accumulated, there were so many and having visited Bobby a lot while Dean and Sam grew up he knew the area well… he could be anywhere. Castiel’s heart sunk.

“We have to go find Dean, where should we start?” Cas asked determined

“Woah kid, slow down. It’s the middle of the night! you need rest and so does Sam. We’ll go in the morning”   

 The look on Bobby’s face stopped Castiel from arguing. He was right Sam was able to sleep and so they should leave him to do it but the thought of having a place to look for Dean and waiting tore at Castiel. He could be in one of those very spots marked on the map, waiting and Castiel was going to make him wait even more. He crossed his arms on the table and rested his chin on them. He prayed Dean was ok.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Where is this hut?” Castiel asked desperate to hurry and look. Sam spun round and pointed
> 
> “That’s it over there!” He said. They all took off running towards where Sam pointed. Castiel looked around as he got closer it looked like no-one had been here for years. They reached the door and Bobby easily broke the old rusted lock with the flash light from his bag. They threw the door open and rushed in.
> 
> “Dean?” Bobby said into the darkness
> 
> “DEAN!” Sam shouted after Bobby received no response.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So we here it is chapter 14 I hope you all enjoy it :) 
> 
> Again just a major thank you to everyone who commented, left kudos and wow just to everyone who's reading my story.

Flashes of green and easy smiles turn to dripping red and a painful grimace. Castiel whimpered and rolled, his head hitting something hard. It startled him awake. Oh awake… it must have been a dream. Yet the unease of it still trickled down his back. His head was lying on Bobby’s kitchen table, he felt a soft blanket covering him and smelt fresh coffee in the air. Castiel pulled the blanket further around himself and stood for the table. His spine groaned and popped as he moved, sleeping hunched over a table had not been comforting to his bones. He stretched further hoping the movements would loosen his muscles and lessen his pain. He halted mid-stretch as Sam walked in. He was in his pyjamas and had clearly just rolled out of bed judging by the fact his hair pointed in all directions.

“Good morning Castiel” Sam sleepily muttered headed for the coffee pot.

“Hello Sam” Cas replied joining Sam in getting coffee. Sam poured two and offered one to Cas, his eyes landed on the blanket

“Dude, did you sleep down here?” he questioned. Castiel followed Sam’s gaze to the blanket

“It wasn’t my intention” Castiel replied almost sheepishly. Sam looked deeply into his coffee

“Dean is going to kick my ass… speaking of we should get showered so we can go find him” Sam drained his cup and strode from the room. Castiel carried his coffee and the blanket with him but returned to Dean’s room to prepare to bring him back.  

Castiel jumped under the hot flow of the shower as glorious as it felt washing over him he quickly washed and jumped back out. He wasn’t wasting anytime. Especially not time while he was comfortable and Dean was not for all he knew.

He quickly dried and started getting dressed. He walked back into Dean’s room and from one of his drawers pulled out a pair of boxers. Cas flushed slightly as he pulled them, he hoped Dean wouldn’t mind. He paused as he was about to put on his shirt when he saw Dean’s  sitting there, the one Cas had slept in and decided to wear that instead.

Cas walked downstairs and re-joined Sam and Bobby around the map.

“Where are we going first?”  Castiel asked looking pointedly at the map.

“We’re going nowhere until you’ve had something to eat” Bobby replied moving around the kitchen. Cas rolled his eyes and looked at Sam who shrugged and gave a defeated look before continuing to eat the rest of the food on his plate. Castiel sighed Bobby had gotten to him too.

A few moments later some toast and scrambled eggs were place on the table in front of Cas. He looked down at it and was about to politely refuse and explain he wasn’t hungry when his traitorous stomach betrayed him a rumbled loudly. Bobby raised one eyebrow and Castiel gave up, shovelling the food into his mouth.  It was gone a few moments later. Castiel was quite surprised how quickly he managed to eat it all but then again he didn’t remember the last time he ate.

“Well now you boys have both fuelled up, let’s go get Dean.” Bobby folded up the map and added it to a packed backpack. Castiel looked to Sam who gave a reassuring nod before they all bundled into Booby’s car for what felt like the hundredth time.

“Here” Bobby tossed the bag into the back between Sam and Cas.

“Get the map out and pick where we go first” Sam opened the bag and pulled out the folded paper and opened it.

“Let’s start with the second cross, the hut by the lake” They drove in mostly silence. The atmosphere was thick, not angry thick but tense everyone was tense with the task that lay before them. Castiel tried to brush it off along with the sense of dread that niggled in the back of his mind but it was hard especially when that dread came with a voice that whispered ‘It’s too late. He’s dead’ ‘You’ll never find him. He’s gone’ ‘Even if you do… he’s never going to want to see you again’.

Gritting his teeth Castiel survived the rest of the journey and was the first out of the car when they finally pulled over.

“Where is this hut?” Castiel asked desperate to hurry and look. Sam spun round and pointed

“That’s it over there!” He said. They all took off running towards where Sam pointed. Castiel looked around as he got closer it looked like no-one had been here for years.  They reached the door and Bobby easily broke the old rusted lock with the flash light from his bag. They threw the door open and rushed in.

“Dean?” Bobby said into the darkness

“DEAN!” Sam shouted after Bobby received no response. They moved further in. The hut wasn’t big and mostly filled with junk. It was painfully obvious that Dean wasn’t here. No-one had been here for ages the small space was dusty and full of cobwebs. They did a thorough sweep just in case, it didn’t take long due to its size and there was nothing helpful so they ticked it off their list and moved on.

Castiel looked at Sam and saw the pain that lay there, he knew it was unrealistic to find Dean in the first place they tried but he couldn’t help how deflated he felt that they didn’t.

“Come on boys, we’ve got a few more places to try yet” Bobby stated nudging Sam. A clear attempt to try and raise spirits, Castiel tried to help.

“Come on Sam where to next?”  Castiel asked faking confidence to reassure Sam.

“Why don’t we try his lock-ups? Which one are we closest to?” he asked as Bobby pulled out the map.

“This one is about 5 miles away.” They all once again loaded into the car.

Again they had no luck. John had 3 lock ups, they searched the two closest and a bunch of other places on the way that Dean could be held in but to no avail. They had searched all day and into most of the night. Thankfully Bobby had thought to pack food and water but as it got further into the night Bobby decided it was time for them to call it day.

Castiel wanted to argue but Bobby and Sam both looked pretty tired. Cas was himself although he’d fight through it to keep searching.

They were driving back, Sam snoring lightly in the back seat next to Cas who rested his head on Bobbies bag.

“Bobby? Can you drop me off at my own house please? I… I don’t think I can stay in Dean’s room again” Cas asked. Bobby agreed and Castiel gave him his address and Bobby drove him home and Cas got out without waking Sam. Before he closed the door though Bobby’s bag came toppling out and emptied on the path next to Cas. Castiel quickly dropped and picked up the objects and shoved them back in the bag before throwing the bag onto the seat next to Sam and closing the door.

Castiel gave a small wave to Bobby who then drove away. As the car drove away Castiel saw a square piece of paper on the ground. He picked it up, it was the map. It must have fallen under the car. Castiel quickly looked up to signal Bobby down but he was too late the car was already gone. Castiel carried the folded map into his house.

“HELLO!” he called out and was shocked to be met by silence. Quickly Cas pulled out his phone and checked it

_No messages_

Strange Castiel thought to himself, why is no-one here. He hit dial on Anna’s number but again just reached her voicemail. Castiel walked further into the empty house.

 

_Dean threw a football, far across the long stretching green field. He squinted into the sun and saw Sammy cheering in a celebratory dance as he caught the ball. Next to him Jess squealed and hugged Sam. That was it 100! They finally reached their goal. Dean felt as though he should also be celebrating with someone. He turned around in search of who was missing and immediately felt comforted and whole when he met blue eyes and messy black hair. Dean smiled and noticed Cas’ eyes tracing the movement, leaning forward Dean joined their lips in a soft heartfelt kiss. It said everything Dean himself struggled to. It told Castiel that Dean was grateful he was here, in his life, got on well with Sammy. That Dean liked him very very much. At Cas’ little moans and nudges Dean was satisfied the message had been received. Dean twisted his hand into Cas’ hair enjoying the softness of it on his fingers when a loud bang sounded. Dean and Castiel didn’t even break the kiss continuing the noise instantly forgotten. Castiel desperately grabbed onto Dean the kiss becoming much wetter and Castiel’s moaning growing louder. Castiel broke apart from Dean, who grumbled, after all it had been a nice kiss. He opened his eyes, unsure of when he closed them, to see red stain Castiel’s lips and slide down his chin. Still staring dumbstruck Dean’s hand flew to wipe the offending colour from his lips but as his hand reached over Castiel fell, crumpled onto the floor and Dean saw the cause of the loud noise. John stood a riffle pointed to where Cas had been standing._

_“NO!” Dean brokenly howled falling to his knees. He pulled Cas into his arms and looked into Cas still, glassed over eyes. Dean tried to scream again but he couldn’t make a sound. Tears fell from his face now hidden in Cas’ shoulder._

_“Dean” he heard but refused to acknowledge and clung to Castiel’s limp rapidly cooling body_

_“Dean!” the voice became more insistent and then hands were on him, trying to pull him from Cas. His Cas. Dean flailed with one hand trying to knock the perpetrator away while still holding Cas to him with the other._

“Dean!” John shouted his hand shaking him on the shoulder. Dean startled and once he registered his father scampered away.

“What have you done?” Dean asked his voice barely a whisper, fear and pain crushing him.

“What?” John asked almost shocked Dean spoke

“You were having a bad dream I-“

“NO, what have you done to Cas?” Dean forces the words out, they taste bitter and bloody on his tongue.

“What had to be done, you’ll start to feel better in a couple of days. Now he’s gone for good” John’s words landed on Dean painfully knocking the air from his lungs. He struggled to breathe. Taking in short gasps and swallowing them down his eyes painful at the unshed tears forcing their way until they spilled down his face. Dean roared and lunged at his father.

“YOU BASTARD!” He thundered forcing his hand into a fist and throwing in his father’s direction. He felt pain erupt through his knuckles as they connect to their target. John grunted in pain before he had his fist up and before Dean could dodge had hit him square in the cheek, Dean collapsed at the force.

“Stay down boy” John spat at him as he tenderly touched his jaw where Dean had hit him. More anger flashed through Dean and forgetting the pain bursting through his cheek Dean reared up and once more lunged at John. Throwing his weight on him Dean managed to topple over the older man who fell, hard on the solid floor. Dean was beginning to have the upper hand for the first time in this whole situation. He drew his hand back to throw another punch but John had been acting he pushed Dean up onto his back and lent on him using his weight to pin Dean down and sending another blow into Dean’s cheek. It felt like the skin broke with it causing Dean momentarily confusion. He snarled at John he felt something cold against his wrist and heard something snap into place. He tried to push his father off him but his hand was held back by something, cuffs. His father had cuffed him. Dean struggled, breathing heavy he stared at his father. John was close enough right in Dean’s face without a seconds thought Dean threw his head forward until it hit his father knocking him backwards and finally off of Dean.

John held his bleeding nose he gave it a wipe with the back of his hand and glared down at Dean.

“I’ll expect an apology for that when you’re feeling better” He sternly stated. Dean looked at his father through his eyelashes and puffed a laugh void of any humour.  John looked slightly defeated

“This isn’t you Dean, you’ll realise that once you’re clean of the boy” he said spitting the word boy as if it was too kind a description. He threw a bottle of water that hit Dean in the chest now he had sat up and then walked out leaving Dean in the darkness.

Dean collapsed in on himself. Castiel dead… He felt broken, how could he be dead!? They’d barely gotten to know each other. All the blood in Dean’s body ran cold and he shivered pulling himself together as much as he could with the handcuffs restricting him. He looked at where they were attached in the unhelpful darkness and saw a small grate attached to the wall. There was no breaking it. Dean saw Sammy’s bear lying just a bit away it must have been thrown in the tousle. Dean stretched his free arm out to get it but it was too far away, he tried using his leg instead but still couldn’t reach. Collapsing in defeat Dean sank against the wall, with the focus of his anger gone the pain of Castiel’s death hit Dean and he broke down.

“I should have save him” Dean whimpered to himself

“He wouldn’t be in this mess if it wasn’t for me” Dean gasped and swallowed a sob

“I should have saved him”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to let people know this is not a major character death fic, I swear to you Cas isn't dead just bear with me and it'll all unravel.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Walking further into the house it was obvious to Castiel that no-one else was there. How strange he thought, he was sure they would be there. Castiel sat at the base of his stairs and thought about Dean. He closed his eyes leaning his head against the handrail, he couldn’t do this. He can’t sit and do nothing while Dean is still missing. Map in hand Castiel determinedly grabbed the keys to his bike and headed towards the garage where his it was parked. He pulled on his helmet and checked the map for another place to look for Dean. There was one lock up left, deciding that’s where he wanted to look Castiel stored the map away and mounted his bike. Kicking it into drive he flew out his garage and down the road. On his bike Castiel felt better he was actively looking for Dean again and he felt freshly optimistic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all survived the tear-jerking, heartbreaking, shocking finale. If you haven't seen it yet best of luck to you.
> 
> Here it is, chapter 15! I hope you like it :)

Walking further into the house it was obvious to Castiel that no-one else was there. How strange he thought, he was sure they would be there. Castiel sat at the base of his stairs and thought about Dean. He closed his eyes leaning his head against the handrail, he couldn’t do this. He can’t sit and do nothing while Dean is still missing. Map in hand Castiel determinedly grabbed the keys to his bike and headed towards the garage where his it was parked. He pulled on his helmet and checked the map for another place to look for Dean. There was one lock up left, deciding that’s where he wanted to look Castiel stored the map away and mounted his bike. Kicking it into drive he flew out his garage and down the road. On his bike Castiel felt better he was actively looking for Dean again and he felt freshly optimistic.

There were lots of winds in the road that made traveling frustratingly longer. After about the 10th turn in the road there was a smaller road leading off, Castiel followed it and ended up at the lock up. He parked his bike and double checked the map. He was definitely in the right place. Cas looked at the row of lock ups how was he supposed to find which one belonged to John. Castiel looked around for clues after all he’d prefer not to have to break into them all.

Searching around the first store Castiel saw a label that read L Brown.  They had labels. Castiel let out a sigh of relief all Castiel had to do was find the one that said Winchester. He searched the block and read all the labels, there was no Winchester but two that were blank. Standing in front of the first blank one Castiel looked at the lock holding it closed. He pulled at it hoping it would just fall open but of course it did not.

“Damn” Castiel muttered, in his haste to look for Dean he forgot to bring something to break the lock.

“Well done Castiel” he told himself as he searched the ground by phone light for something that would work.

Thankfully a large enough rock was laying nearby, Castiel grabbed it and took it back over to the storage unit. He used his phone light to check the position of the lock before putting it in his mouth. It barely shone a light on lock, but he needing two hands to force it open. He grabbed the rock in both hands and swung it down from his shoulder onto the lock. He checked the lock but it remained unbroken. Hitting it multiple more time it finally gave and broke away.  Pushing the door open Castiel walked in, the room was dark, too dark to see. Feeling around he eventually found a cord he hoped was for a light. He got lucky, a sharp tug later and the room was flooded with a yellow glow.

Castiel scanned the room his eyes were drawn to a heap in the corner. Dean. Lurching forward Castiel whispered in shock

“Dean?” He moved over to the other man and saw him curled in a ball mumbling. He was asleep but it wasn’t a restful sleep he kept flinching. He placed his hand out and touched Dean’s shoulder, shaking it lightly

“Dean? Wake up” Dean’s eyes flashed open as he flinched awake. He moved away from Castiel as if scared of him. Castiel was momentarily hurt but he saw the bruises that littered his face and saw the handcuff that secured him here. No wonder he was scared.

“No no no nonononono, you’re not real. You’re not here” Dean spat out refusing to look at Cas.

Castiel hesitantly placed his hand on Dean’s chin and tenderly tipped it so Dean was looking at him

“See, I am real. I can touch you. It’s me Cas. I’m here” he soothingly told Dean hoping it would relax him but Dean pulled out of Cas’ grasp

“NO!” He screamed voice breaking slightly “I should have saved you! This never would have happened if it weren’t for me. It’s all my fault. It’s my fault you died” Cas sat back shocked. Dean believed him dead? But how? He leaned forward again and wiped the freshly fallen tears from Dean’s cheeks. He looked him in the eye and closed the gap between them placing a firm kiss on Dean’s lips

“I assure you Dean, I am quite alive and here to help you!” Dean looked at Castiel, extending his hand it hovered in front of his face. Sensing Dean’s hesitancy he pushed his nose into Dean’s palm nuzzling slightly before moving his face so Dean was cupping his cheek.

“Cas?” He whispered

“Yes Dean” Castiel responded giving Dean’s hand a small kiss.

“CAS!” Dean tried to push forward and grab onto Cas but restrained by the handcuffs Dean ended up hooking Cas and pulling him down into him.

“We can hug later Dean, right now we have to go” as hard as it was Castiel detangled himself from Dean “now… how do we get you out of these?” he asked pointing at the cuffs

“Is there a paper clip around here somewhere?” Dean glanced around, not that he could see much from his position. Castiel got up and wandered around the space looking for a paper clip or similar object. He picked up a few things and took them back to Dean.

“I found this plastic thingy” He held it up for Dean to see who inspected it

“Nah, no good Cas it’ll break” Cas threw it aside and held up the next object

“It’s a flat screwdriver object” Dean looked it over and took it from Castiel’s hand no that won’t work

“That’s all I could find Dean” Castiel began to panic

“Shame you don’t have Sammy’s hair and use bobby pins” Dean rasped a laugh

Castiel looked at the pants he was wearing, there was a possibility. They did get everywhere. Pushing his hand in his front pocket Castiel felt only his phone, in his second front pocket the key to his bike. The first back pocket nothing- wait a small metal rod. Castiel pulled from his pocket a bobby pin.

Dean looked surprised and a little confused

“Anna hides them in my pockets so I always have one if she needs one. This is the first time I’ve ever been grateful” Castiel handed Dean the pin who proceeded to stretch it out and managed to pick the cuff lock. Castiel immediately pulled Dean to his feet; supporting him they walked together back to Cas bike.

“Cas? Are you wearing my shirt? It’s not even clean” he commented. Castiel adjusted Dean’s position against him and answered

“I am yes”

“Looks good on you. I like you in my clothes” Castiel wasn’t entirely sure what made him reply what he did, whether it was elation at having found Dean or adrenaline or if he simply wanted to but he could help the words

“Well, then you’ll be happy to know I’m also wearing your underwear” from tumbling from his mouth. Dean moaned slightly and bit his lip but didn’t utter a word.

Back at the bike Castiel forced his helmet onto Dean’s head, not having thought to bring a spare, before saddling the man himself on the bike and taking his position in front. He wrapped Dean’s arms around his waist.

“Hold on” Dean snuggled in tighter and Castiel started the bike and drove Dean back to Castiel’s house as it was closer than Bobby’s and Cas wasn’t sure how long Dean could stay on a bike for.

They made it to Castiel’s house although it was worrying going along the winding road. Cas managed to manoeuvre Dean into his house and let him collapse on the armchair in the living-room.

“I’m just going to get a first aid kit to patch you up ok Dean?” He asked gently. Dean nodded his agreement but groaned and grabbed Cas’ arm when he turned to walk away. Castiel knelt down beside Dean, looked him in the eye and stroked his cheek. Dean melted into the motion.

“I’ll be back in a moment” Castiel untangled Dean from him and sprinted to the kitchen grabbing the first aid kit and running back. He wasn’t comfortable letting Dean out of his sight for more time than was necessary. Returning to Dean, Cas again knelt before him. He pulled out an antiseptic wipe and began cleaning the cuts on Dean’s face. He tensed and muttered

“I’m sorry Dean” when the alcohol from the wipe came in contact with the open cut, causing it to sting. As carefully as he could Cas also wiped the wound at the back of Dean’s head. He had no idea how bad it was.

Panicking Castiel pulled out his phone and dialled 911.

“Who are you calling Cas?” Dean asked as he rested

“An ambulance, I’m worried about the wound to your head” Castiel responded listening to the ringing in the phone. Dean grabbed at his shoulder

“Cas, hang up” Dean slumped forward and Castiel hung up the phone before grabbing him and placing him back on the chair.

“What is it Dean? What’s wrong?” Castiel’s hands fluttered over Dean searching for a cause of pain

“You can’t call an ambulance that’ll involve the cops… I can’t” Dean reasoned

“Dean” Castiel growled “that man kidnapped and beat you, you need medical help” he insisted pulling up his phone again.

“Then… call Michael?” Dean suggested. Cas didn’t like this suggestion but it seemed like the only option left, he just hoped to God Michael answered. Castiel selected the contact and pressed call.

The phone rang for an eternity, in these moments Castiel decided screw it if Michael didn’t answer he was calling an ambulance. He was not risking Dean for the sake of his father.

_“Castiel?”_ Michael asked, worry tinting his voice

“Michael, thank god! I don’t have time. You need to come home, Dean has hit his head and you need to come check him over please. I’m worried” he pleaded hoping his brother wasn’t too far away.

_“Calm down, Castiel. I’ll be there shortly. Was he attacked?”_

“Yes, he was I’ll explain later just please hurry!”

_“Of course, are you safe? Does anyone else know you are at home?”_

“Yes we’re safe for now no-one else knows we’re here. Hurry!”  Castiel hung up the phone and took Dean’s hand. No-one knows they’re here but Sam and Bobby should.

“Michael is coming. It’s going to be ok Dean” Castiel dialled the number for Sam. He had forgotten in his worry to let them know. It rang out to Castiel’s frustration he left a message saying they were at his home and that they’d called for Michael. Ending the message Castiel looked at Dean, who pulled Castiel up and tried to get him into his lap but Castiel squirmed and refused

“Dean, no. You’re hurt I’m not going to sit on you” he said running his hands through Dean’s hair but avoiding anywhere near the injury. Dean looked at Castiel sadness deep in his eyes

“Castiel please? I thought you were dead” seeing the pain that lay in Dean’s eyes Cas adapted a position that involved the arm of the chair taking the majority of his weight but still giving Dean the closeness he needed. They sat wrapped in one another for what must have been about 10 minutes just enjoying the presence of each other. Both grateful the other was alive and here. They sat that way until they heard the front door open. Castiel climbed off Dean and began walking towards the door when a figure that didn’t belong to Michael entered the room.

John stood his arm outstretched, a gun in hand pointed directly at Castiel’s chest

“YOU” He spat “YOU’VE TAKEN MY SON, CORRUPTED HIM AND TURNED HIM AGAINST ME” Castiel threw his hands up in hope of appeasing Dean’s father but his words made the action seem rather redundant.

“I… Sir I-“ he managed to stutter out

“SHUT UP” John yelled

“Dad” Dean stood getting John’s attention, the gun now pointed at him “put the gun down” Slowly and with his hands visible Dean walked so he stood in front of Castiel blocking him from John.

“No-one has to get hurt dad, just put the gun down” Dean spoke softly and carefully as if dealing with a spooked animal. But he wasn’t, he was dealing with a man who’d lost his mind. John didn’t speak but he also didn’t loosen his grip on the gun.

“I’ll do whatever you want, we’ll leave. Start again someplace else. I’ll never even look at another man but no one needs to get hurt” his sentence slowed emphasising the last few words

“Oh it’s too late for that, he’s infected you. He has to go” John took a step towards them. As he did Castiel felt Dean’s hand rest on his arm and push him slightly, they were closer to the hallway now but there was no way they could make it out the front door.

“Cas, run!” Dean hissed

“Not without you” he replied grapping Dean’s arm and pulling him as he turned and ran. A gunshot echoed as Cas pulled Dean upstairs towards his bedroom. They both tore into the room and Dean immediately slammed and locked the door behind him before grapping Castiel’s hand and moving him so they both crouched hidden behind Castiel’s bed. They heard footsteps and then John shouted

“DEAN! GET OUT HERE NOW” he sounded desperate. Dean looked at Castiel but stayed quiet and squeezed Cas’ hand.

“I’ve lost you” John sobbed. It was painstakingly silent for a moment before footsteps sounded into the distance again. Castiel let out a breath but held his next inhale as they heard John moving around downstairs. They sat and listened as he opened and shut drawers. Eventually the front door opened and shut again and they were left with only the sound of their own breathing. They sat for minutes straining to hear any movement.

“Is he gone?” Castiel whispered to scared to speak louder

“I don’t know… I’ll have a look” Dean stood, Castiel with him refusing to release his hand

“Not on your own you’re not” he pushed Dean forward slightly before he had a chance to argue. They reached the door and Castiel silently unlocked it. He nodded at Dean who nodded in response before pulling the door open. Dean stuck his head partially out the door frame to scout before he tugged Cas’ hand giving him the all clear. Dean led Castiel towards the stairs when there was a large boom and the ground fell away from beneath them.

Castiel tried to cling to Dean but was thrown from him. He fell and landed painfully, sitting up, Cas looked for Dean but couldn’t see him there was too much rubble everywhere. Castiel took in his surroundings and recognised the first floor of his house except it was on fire and heavy with smoke. Darkness crept into Castiel’s vision, working its way in from the edges. He felt himself fall horizontal just as everything faded.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean felt heavy. He couldn’t move his arms or legs, his eyes wouldn’t open. He was hot, too hot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So chapter 16 here we are... prepare for some fluff to balm the angst that has been lately.
> 
> I haven't in a while thanked my wonderful best friend who is my editor and motivator and really deserves so many hugs!! You know who you are :D 
> 
> Again thank you to every one who comments, leaves kudos and reads this little story of mine. It's unbelievable the response I've gotten to it and I can't thank everyone enough. Please enjoy this installment" :D

Dean felt heavy. He couldn’t move his arms or legs, his eyes wouldn’t open. He was hot, too hot.

 Floating?, he was moving but not his body was perfectly still. He was vaguely aware of someone saying his name.

“Casss” Dean mumbled, someone told him

“shh, just relax”

He didn’t register who the voice belonged to but felt comforted by the sound.

Awareness left Dean. 

There was a faint beeping it was the first thing Dean could hear. As he focused more on it he began hearing voices. He tried to hone in on them

“He’s going to be ok…” something touched his hand, no held it. Someone was holding his hand. He forced his eyes open and saw a mop of brown hair

“Sam” Dean croaked his voice raw

“Dean? Dean!” Sam called hovering next to him as if scared if he touched Dean he’d hurt him.

“Hey buddy” he smiled gently punching Sam with his right arm, his left had an IV attached to it. Looking over his little brother’s shoulder he saw Bobby smiling back at him. It occurred to Dean he was in hospital, the machines and the décor proved that, not to mention the over clean, sterile smell. Fear laced Dean

“What happen? Where’s Cas?” Dean tried to sit up and get out his bed when both Bobby and Sam pushed him back down.

“Castiel is fine he’s in the room next door. He hasn’t woken up yet but the doctors say he’s doing good” Bobby reassured him.

“Can I see him? I need to see him!?” Dean asked not relenting in his goal of getting up.

“In a bit the doctor needs to check you out first, Sam will you go tell him Dean is awake?” Bobby asked. Sam nodded and gently squeezed Dean’s shoulder before leaving the room.

Dean immediately looked at Bobby

“What is it?” he asked. Bobby’s face pinched, he looked conflicted and hurt.

“Dean… what do you remember?” Bobby took a seat next to Dean’s bed

“Well… I was in Dad’s lock up and Cas came and got me and we went back to his. I was beat up so Cas called his brother and we were waiting for him when dad showed up and he had a gun. He looked mad Bobby, proper insane. Anyway we ran and hide and eventually he left. Me and Cas go out to check, there was a loud boom and it’s mostly black after that until I woke up” Dean took a breath he was still achy and retelling the story made him a bit tired.

“Dean the house exploded. It’s wreck. Me and Sam arrived and managed to pull you both out before it completely collapsed” Dean took in the information Bobby had just told him. It exploded?

“How did it explode?” he questioned, confused.

“The firemen say it was an appliance malfunction” Bobby sneered

“But you know it wasn’t” Dean supplied filling in the gaps

“It was my dad…” Bile rose in Dean’s throat, his father had tried to blow him up. He wanted to kill us so badly he blew the place up. How was Dean supposed to tell Cas that everything he owned was destroyed and that was all down to Dean’s father.

Sam walked back into the room closely followed by who Dean assumed was the doctor. Reading the man’s badge confirmed he was the doctor, Dr Fitzgerald.

“Hello Dean, I’m Dr Garth Fitzgerald your doctor but please call me Garth. How are you feeling?” he asked

“Honestly Doc… err Garth. I’m alright, a bit achy and groggy but alright” Dean vaguely replied

“Are you sure? Do I need to bring in a sock puppet that has the power to tell when people are lying?” Garth asked in a much too serious tone. Dean looked pleadingly at Bobby who shrugged his shoulders. Looking at Sam instead for a rescue Dean saw his brother biting his lip holding back a laugh, there would be no help there. Eventually drawing his attention back to his doctor Dean said

“Seriously dude, I’m fine!” ending that discussion. Garth picked up Dean’s chart and read through it writing things down and mumbling to himself occasionally.

“Well Dean, you’re much better than we were expecting this soon-“

“How is my friend Castiel?” Dean interrupted sick of hearing about himself and desperate to know.

“He’s still unconscious unfortunately he inhaled more smoke than you and had a harder fall but he’s going to be fine. It’s incredibly lucky that neither of you were killed, in fact how you both got out without a broken bone is astonishing. You must have angels watching over you”

Dean snorted then angels were dicks, they should have helped sooner. Garth checked a couple of the machines around Dean’s bed and took out his IV.

“I can get you a chair if you’d like to go see Castiel?” Garth asked Dean his voice laced with sympathy. Eagerly Dean sat up flinching when he was hit by pain.

“And that’s why we need the chair” the doctor replied smiling before leaving the room. A few moments late he returned wheeling a wheelchair. He parked it next to Dean’s bed. Gingerly Dean climbed from his bed into the chair. He could have walked but the chair was fairly comfy and he was still quite tired. Garth wheeled him round stopping outside his door. Dean looked up at him confused. Why were they waiting? He’s right there just through that door. Dean lent forward and put his hand on the door.

“Dean, before you go in I want to prepare you… Castiel experienced some severe burns. But they look worse than they are. They will heal completely and shouldn’t even scar but I want you to be aware of this before you go in”

Dean swallowed around the lump in his throat and took a multiple gulps of air before nodding at the doctor who then opened the door and wheeled Dean inside.

“I’ll leave you be” he said before leaving Dean alone.

“Cas” Dean whispered. He pushed his chair closer until he was by Cas’ right side. Dean looked at Cas, he had wires connected to him but he lay peacefully with the bed sheet up to his waist, one leg sticking out.

“Oh Cas. I’m… I’m so sorry” Dean’s eyes skimmed over Castiel, his face was cut and bruised. His eyes shut and Dean felt a piercing pain at not seeing the warm deep blue he associated with Cas and with comfort, on his left arm was burns from his shoulder to his elbow, there were more burns on his left thigh and bruises further down his leg. Although the hospital gown and sheet were covering the rest of Castiel’s body Dean knew he’d find similar bruises there.

Gently Dean lifted Castiel’s hand taking it in his. He rested his forehead on it.

“I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry Cas” Dean mumbled. He pushed his lips to Castiel’s hand muttering sorry into it. He felt his eyes sting and the tears began to fall. They landed on Cas’ hand leaving a salty trail.

“Oh man” Dean laughed humourlessly through the tears

“Look at me making a mess of you, even now” Dean lifted his own hospital gown and wiped the water from Castiel’s skin. Dean heard a painful hiss and sharp sigh, his head shot to look at Castiel.

Castiel had a small pinch in his brow but his eyes were open and for the first time in what felt like forever Dean could see into their blue depth and felt a safeness glow within him.

“Cas?... Cas it’s me, Dean” he said hovering next to Castiel afraid to overwhelm him.

“I know who you are, I’m burnt not brain dead” he retorted. Dean smirked and wiped away the few happy tears that had managed to escape.

“How’re you feeling?” he asked brushing his hand through his hair

“I’m a bit sore and drowsy but apart from that perfectly well. Are you alright Dean?”

“Yeah, Cas. I’m fine” Dean answered placing his hand on the side of Castiel’s face avoiding the bruising and cuts, fearful of causing any more pain.

“What happened? I remember leaving the room with you then falling and fire” Cas’ eyes widened marginally. Dean look down at the hospital bed he couldn’t face Cas not as he told him this.

“My… my dad, he… he blew up your house” Dean heard a small gasp from Castiel and prepared for the shouting, the screaming. The, I never want to see you again speech. Dean flinched as a hand found his chin but the pain he expected never came. Instead the hand nudged his chin up and Dean was forced to meet Castiel’s eyes. Dean searched the blue for anger, resentment, loathing but he couldn’t find it. He saw a little sadness but not nearly as much as he expected.

“Dean the only thing I really care about that was in that building got out” he said before leaning up and placing his lips to Dean’s. Dean felt the tender touch, both their lips were slightly chapped but that didn’t take away from the softness of the kiss. When the kiss ended they stayed with their heads right next to each other, Dean could feel every breath Castiel took and it was heavenly just a small sign that he was alive.

“It was you Dean, in case you were unaware” Castiel stated determinedly. A small heat rose in Dean’s cheeks

“Yeah, Cas… the kiss gave it away” Dean said smiling down at Castiel

“I just had to be sure you know what you mean to me” Dean watched as Castiel’s features shifted and he moves away from Dean until they were no longer touching and Castiel was lying back on the bed. So this was it, panic flooded Dean and pain set in. Suddenly every inch of his body hurt and his blood was too ferociously pumping round his body. He could hardly hear through its rushing. This was where Cas was going to say ‘but I never want to see you again. Sure I don’t directly blame you but none of this would have happened without you and you’re just not worth it’.

“Dean!? Are you ok? Please don’t hate me” everything came crashing to a stop

“Wait, what?” Dean asked. Surely he hadn’t heard that right there was no way Castiel was asking him not to hate him.

“I know this is entirely my fault but please Dean don’t hate me. I understand if you don’t want to see me again” Dean looked at Cas. How can he be real? He was actually blaming himself.

“How can you possibly be to blame?” Dean asked boggled that Cas was even thinking that.

“I upset you, the night of the storm. If I had left you be, you never would have left and none of this would have happened”

“What- Cas no” Dean moved forward until he was right next to Cas and held his face in his hands

“Castiel, this is in no way you’re fault! If anyone’s to blame it’s me, I never should have dragged you into my shitty life”

“Dean! I need you in my life. You didn’t drag me. I jumped head first” Cas had worked his hands so they were now holding Dean, It can’t have be comfortable. Dean scooted Cas over slightly as gently as he could and perched on the edge of the bed next to him ensuring to give Cas’ injured legs enough space.

“Bet you didn’t think this was what you were diving into huh?” Dean questioned. Castiel moved so he was now resting his head on Dean’s chest his bruised arm was between them but he didn’t seem in pain, Dean stayed very still, careful not to put pressure on any part of Cas or to jostle him.

“No, but I wouldn’t change it because then I wouldn’t have you” Castiel finally said. Dean lent down and kissed the top of his head.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Casssss” Dean teased “Cas what was that?” he asked sing-songing
> 
> “It was nothing, I was merely changing channels” Castiel responded shyly. Dean walked over and joined Castiel on his bed and picked up the remote. Pointing it at the TV Dean flicked the channel back on

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, here is chapter 17 yey! A few things, my laptop is currently broken so updates may be slower for a bit. Just a little pre-warning so sorry about that. The second thing is I'm playing around with the idea of doing a few time-stamps once I've finished the story and was just wondering what the general feeling about that would be? Please let me know and also if there is a particular time in their lives you'd be interested in or anything, thanks :) also if there it's anything you want to know ask away!  
> Finally thank you for comments, kudos and reading again. I will honestly never be able to thank you enough or express how wonderful you're all making this experience.
> 
> Please enjoy :)

Garth came in and checked Castiel over. The look of confusion when Dean warned him about the sock puppet had Dean laughing hours later. They passed time in the hospital by spending it together: they watch TV, played card games – Dean still kicked Castiel’s ass at poker. The only time they weren’t together was during check up’s and when they were sleeping although they did occasionally sleep curled on one bed. Mostly Dean went to Castiel’s room during the day as it was easier and more comfortable for him to move around. Eventually Garth pulled a few strings and managed to get them moved to a double room. 

Dean walked out of the bathroom and saw on the TV he and Cas shared a pair of cowboy boots and what looked like a hospital floor before the screen faded to black. Dean looked at Castiel who had thrown the remote away and was now sheepishly playing with his sheet. 

“Casssss” Dean teased “Cas what was that?” he asked sing-songing

“It was nothing, I was merely changing channels” Castiel responded shyly. Dean walked over and joined Castiel on his bed and picked up the remote. Pointing it at the TV Dean flicked the channel back on and as suspected Doctor Sexy was showing.

“Cas, you don’t have to hide that you’re a fan… I have the complete box set to date” Dean admits somewhat hesitantly. Not even Sam knows about his guilty pleasure.  
Castiel looked up at Dean and they both laughed together. They snuggled down on Castiel’s bed to watch the rest of the episode.

“I’m not caught up yet” Castiel mutters contentedly into Dean’s side.

“Oh just wait until Doctor Piccolo- OW!” there was a sharp jab at Dean’s side

“Dean… no spoilers please” Castiel requested still watching the Doctor Sexy episode

“Gee Cas, sorry” Dean replied rubbing the spot Castiel’s finger had poked. Castiel pulled up Dean’s t-shirt and lent over gently to place a soft kiss at the slightly red spot.

“My apologies, I just don’t want to ruin it” Castiel rubbed his hand over Dean’s side who just huffed. They spent hours just holding each other watching Doctor Sexy. It was a back to back marathon after all and well, they had nothing better to do. Castiel laced his fingers through Dean’s where they rested on his stomach. They sat and watched their fingers intertwine during an ad commercial. 

“You know, all of this Dean. It really isn’t that much of a price to pay considering I get you in return” Castiel untangled from Dean and got off the bed, he took Dean’s hand as he sat up to see what Cas was doing and saw him bend down on one knee.

“Cas wha- Oh my god Cas! What are y-“ Castiel held his hand up to stop Dean’s rambling. Dean felt his heart beat rapidly, he was glad he wasn’t hooked up to a heart monitor any more or he’d probably break it.

“Dean Winchester, we’ve been through a lot. Would you do me the honour of being my …boyfriend?” Dean clasped his chest and rolled his eyes before gently tugging Cas up and into a very careful hug

“You ass… You had me worried” Dean said hoping his heart had calmed down enough Cas couldn’t feel it.

“Dean I may not be a social master but even I know proposing a week after meeting is ridiculous” he reasoned

“Well… I thought we were already… together” Dean moaned 

“No harm in making it official” Castiel smirked

“Does this mean I get to call you pet names now like baby and honey” Castiel squinted at Dean 

“Yes I suppose it does… dear” Castiel gave Dean a peck on the lips.

“Alright then baby” Dean said playfully waggling his eyebrows. Castiel leaned forward again and kissed Dean. They were both a still a bit tender but they had a lot of really sweet  
kisses and Dean was surprisingly ok with that. Usually Dean kissed ferociously, granted he hadn’t kissed a whole lot and they were mostly girls but with Cas Dean felt comfortable and loved the long slow kisses they had been sharing. He was happy in these moments and when they were snuggling watching television, a piece of them always touching whether it was their hands linked together or their legs next to each other. When had Cas started to feel so much like home? Dean didn’t remember, the thought kinda scared him but not as much as thinking that he actually might have said yes if Cas had been proposing. 

They were still twisted together kissing each other softly in-between mutters of baby, honey, darling, boyfriend and other pet names they thought of when the door to their room suddenly open and in stumbled-

“Sammy, perfect timing as always” Dean grumbled over Castiel’s shoulder

“Really guys? In a hospital?” Sam asked looking quite disturbed 

“Oh dude, no. But we were having a moment” Dean retaliated

“You, a moment Dean ‘no chick flick moments’ Winchester was having a moment” Sam asked smirking he looked directly at Castiel 

“Good job Cas, I have years of ammunition from this” He said his smile growing. Dean groaned and rested his head in the crook of Cas’ neck again feeling the safety of home that  
Cas provided. Dean felt Castiel laugh and lifted his head to glare at him.

“Sorry Sweetie” He said brushing his hands through Dean’s hair, who scowled more at the use of the pet name in front of his brother but relaxed at the feel of Cas’ fingers running through his hair. Cas then pulled himself from Dean but sat next to them and claimed his hand, a motion Sam seemed to find endearing.  
“How are you two doing anyway?” he asked “it’s great they got you a room to share, your doctor is a pretty great guy. If slightly strange with the whole puppet thing” Dean and Castiel both laughed, Castiel finally getting the joke after Doctor Fitzgerald felt it necessary to bring the damn thing in. It kinda freaked Dean out if he was honest, plus who names a sock Mr. Fizzles anyway. 

“We’re doing well Sam, thank you for asking. How are you fairing?” Castiel asked ever polite. Already answering for the both of them, usually Dean would speak up and answer himself but well Cas was just as in tune with how Dean was feeling as Dean was and it didn’t scare Dean as much as he expected to be a ‘we’. 

“I’m fine Cas thanks, still staying with Bobby who should be here any minute actually” Sam said checking his watch. Dean, Cas and Sam all sat waiting for Bobby to arrive, Doctor Sexy was still showing and Dean was much more shy about his enjoyment of the show now Sam was in the room.

“We, were just channel surfing” Dean spat out as a suggestion as to why the show was on. Sam outright snorted and looked at Dean

“Please… I know you have the box set” and walked over to sit on Dean’s bed as it was currently vacant. Dean laughed flatly and looked at Cas who was just smiling watching the show. They sat like that for the majority of the episode Sam asking questions as to why each character did something and Dean answering them all instantly yet annoyed at the continuous interruption of his show. Eventually Dean just insisted Sam should go home and watch his box set. Sam simply laughed at Dean and explained he wasn’t that into to which Dean replied well then why are you asking a question every five seconds. A full on sibling spat started. Dean and Sam were still arguing when Bobby walked in. 

“Calm down boys, yer in a hospital. People don’t wanna be hearing you arguing” Dean and Sam both looked shamefully at the floor. 

“Now I need to talk to you boys” Bobby added looking at Dean and Cas “I’ve filled Sam in-“

“Bobby!” Dean said upset. Bobby looked sternly at Dean 

“The kid deserved to know” his look softened and Dean painfully looked at Sam.

“We need to work out how John knew where to find you” Stating to the entire room, Bobby sat in the chair beside Castiel’s bed. Sam brought the chair next to Dean’s bed round and placed it next to Bobby’s taking position there. 

“Who knew both that you were at home and where your home was?” Bobby asked Castiel. Cas thought for a second.

“I only told Sam and my brother Michael so he could check over Dean. Did you not see him? Dean said you were the one who pulled us out but was Michael not there?” Bobby sat for a moment absorbing the information. He turned to Sam.

“Sam did you tell anyone apart from me where the boys were?” Sam looked hurt at being asked and immediately replied

“No absolutely not! I told you then we went to the house. I never told a soul” he quickly defended him. Castiel was the first to speak 

“We know you didn’t Sam. I’m sure Bobby was just checking because he didn’t want to jump to conclusions but it seems it was the right one. It must have been Michael” Castiel finished voicing everyone’s thoughts. Dean squeezed his hand and Cas looked like he was about to be sick. He pulled his hand away from Dean and walked into the bathroom.

“Bobby, Michael really? Sure the guy is an ass but why would he tell dad where we were?” Dean asked confused

“That’s what we need to figure out” Castiel answered walking back into the room and taking a deep breath. He walked back towards his bed that Dean was currently occupying but when he reached it he walked past and went to the bedside table, opening the small drawer they were given, Castiel pulled something out. He turned and lifted the object so everyone could see,

“I think it’s time I called my brother” Dean shot off the bed at Castiel’s words and hurried over to him taking the phone from his hand, Cas resisted momentarily but then released it to Dean who tossed it on the bed and replaced its space with his own hand.

“Cas, we don’t have to do anything right now. We don’t know facts yet” Dean reasoned 

“That is precisely why I need to call him Dean, so we can get answers” Cas defended hardening his look at Dean.  
Dean was at a loss, these situations were always hard for him he constantly stumbled over what to say or what to do with his hands. He took Cas’ hand tighter in his and placed his other on Cas face. Castiel’s eyes softened and Dean was glad. It made this easier.

“Cas, your brother already hurt you” Dean’s eyes dropped to where he knew Cas’ scar was. “Now we find out he might have sent my father to kill you” Dean choked, the idea of Cas dying chilled him.

“Dean” Cas said softly pushing his face into Dean’s hand.

“I… I can’t… can’t” Dean couldn’t even say it so instead he leant forward and kissed Castiel. He pushed all of his fears into the kiss hoping Castiel knew that he couldn’t lose him, couldn’t risk it. Dean pulled back once he felt he had gotten his message across and saw Castiel’s eyes flick over to where Bobby and Sam sat awkwardly looking anywhere but at them. 

“I can’t lose you, Cas” Dean whispered into Castiel’s ear as he rested his head on Cas’ shoulder, the one free of burns. 

“You’ll never have to” Castiel whispered back holding Dean to him

“We do need to find out what’s going on though Dean” Sam quietly added. Dean bristled and turned to face his brother standing protectively in front of Cas.

“Not by putting Cas at risk” he growled 

“The kids right Dean we need Castiel to get Michael to talk-“

“No” snarling Dean looked at Bobby

“We’d keep him safe, there would be no way anyone could hurt him” Dean was about to argue about to scream when a hand rested on his shoulder.

“Dean I won’t be safe until we find out what is happening and neither will you, so I have to do this” Castiel soothed but his tone was edged with determination. Dean would not win this fight.

“Cas” Dean said helplessly. Castiel placed a soft kiss to Dean before going and picking up his cell phone. He dialled a number and look apologetically at Dean who slumped on to the floor.

“Hello Michael. It’s Castiel, there’s been an accident. I’m in the hospital… yes. As soon as you can, goodbye” Castiel hung up the phone.

“He’ll be here tomorrow” he stated. 

Dean dropped his head into his hands as fear gripped his heart.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel was sitting in his bed, waiting, waiting for Michael. He hoped against all odds that John had found them some other way, anything but the thought that Michael had tried to kill him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I've had some positive feed back about my time stamp idea but I'd still love to hear what you think so please feel free to comment. Also if you want to know about a specific time in their lives for the time stamps or just have a general question please ask :)
> 
> Thanks again for reading, commenting or leaving kudos. I will say this every time because I can't thank everyone enough!! :)
> 
> I hope you enjoy this installment :D

Castiel was sitting in his bed, waiting, waiting for Michael. He hoped against all odds that John had found them some other way, anything but the thought that Michael had tried to kill him. Bobby was in the room next door and with such thin walls would easily hear if anything bad started to happen. They also agreed upon a code word, if Castiel was to say ‘funky town’ Bobby would come running. Castiel smiled slightly remember the code word, he’d allowed Dean to pick it in the hope it would offer him some peace. Castiel also liked how it was a piece of Dean to protect him.

They had decided it was best Dean not be in the room, so they had kissed and Dean gave Castiel one of his plaid over shirts to wear, it was blue and white with some red through it. Dean had thrown it at him before leaving muttering something about how it would suit him because it matched his eyes. Castiel smiled warmly at the gesture and now that he had bandages he shrugged on the shirt, ecstatic to be out of the hospital gown and happier yet to be in Dean’s clothes. 

Castiel was nervously playing with the sleeve of Dean’s shirt when Michael finally walked in.

“Oh Castiel, I’ve been so worried” Michael fawned slipping into one of the seats next to Castiel’s bed.

“Don’t worry Michael, I’m in good health” Michael nodded his agreement

“Yes, you seem much better than I expected you to be. That shirt you’re wearing suits you” Castiel looked slightly confused

“How did you expect me to be? Thank you, it’s actually one of Dean’s” he asked Michael trying to hide his suspicions and watched his features harden as Castiel mentioned Dean.

“Well Cassie the house is rubble, I expected you to be a lot worse” Michael answered smoothly

“You were at the house?” Castiel prodded determined to get his answers but to be smart about it.

“Yes you called me remember” Michael almost seemed concerned at Castiel asking this, but Cas didn’t believe his brother. If Michael was there why Bobby was the one to pull him out and why had it taken Michael until now to visit.

“Yes I remember Michael” Castiel replies pointedly “why did you wait until I called to visit? Surely you must have guessed I was in hospital?”

“Of course I did Castiel, but after what you- what happened at the house I needed to find somewhere for Anna and I to live” Castiel flinched at the ‘what you’ he knew what Michael meant. It was obvious. He was trying to blame Castiel.

“How did you get out?” Michael asked Castiel interrupted with his own question

“How did he know where to find us? Oh Mr. Singer pulled us out” Castiel vaguely answered and appeared as if he was thinking.

“Perhaps he followed you?” Michael said off hand before adding more intensely “Who is this Mr. Singer” he tried to sound casual but Castiel heard the need for answers in his voice.

“No he couldn’t have followed us, I was very careful” and Cas was, he had to drive carefully the state Dean was in and he would have known. “He is a friend of Dean’s father, he was looking after them, and I’d called him to say Dean was   
safe”

“So Mr. Singer knew where you were has obvious ties with Dean’s father obviously he was the one who told him” Michael suggested and it sounded like a legitimate theory

“What do you mean told him?” Castiel asked

“Told him where you were so he could attack you again, brother are you feeling alright you’ve gone very pale” Michael queried edging forward

“How did you know it was Dean’s father who attacked us?” Castiel asked hoping to keep the bile in stomach settled.

“I, I spoke to the police, they told me” Michael replied fumbling slightly in what was obviously a lie

“We never told the police who it was, they don’t know” Castiel said slowly putting more space between Michael and himself. Castiel was worried about what Michael was going to do, funky town was on the tip of his tongue ready to be   
spat out but Michael just sneered at Castiel.

“Michael… Why?” Castiel asked not really expecting an answer but wanting to know.

“Well, Castiel because you’re not right, never have been. You just don’t fit in this family or in this world” he looks at Castiel disgusted

“So you try and have me killed?” his life has crashed down around him, it’s crumbling. The acceptance he thought he had from his brother gone in moments, that safety he thought family brought, gone.

“Yes it’s perhaps a little dramatic but your lifestyle doesn’t fit in with our life and poor misled Anna would never let you go and you would never leave her so this was really the only option you left me” Michael was standing now with   
his hands in his pockets rocking back and forth on his feet as if explaining this to Castiel was a waste of his time.

“What is you hold over Dean’s father?” Cas demanded. Michael only laughed in response, before he could say anything Dean came crashing through the door.

“Cas! Are you alright?” He asked moving directly next to him and looking him over “you son of a bitch!” Dean roared at Michael who tutted and replied

“Oh careful Dean, that’s Castiel’s mother you’re talking about” he pointedly looked at his watch “well visiting hour is up” he walked over to the door and pulled it open but before leaving he turned and said

“I guess if you want something done, you really do have to do it yourself” the door slammed behind him. Dean was on him in seconds looking him over, hands tracing place he knew burns didn’t lie before finally holding his face and   
looking him in the eye.

“I was so worried” Dean whispered sounding relieved. Dean peppered Cas with kisses until Castiel broke apart

“Dean, we really should get Bobby” Castiel began moving towards the door when he was pulled back by Dean’s hand in his. Instead Dean walked over to the wall joining the rooms they and Bobby were in. He knocked on it three times   
before dragging Castiel back to sit down on the bed.

“You’re sure you are ok?” Dean hovered around Castiel

“Yes Dean, I’m perfectly fine” Castiel pulled Dean down onto the bed and then into a hug. They sat in each other’s arms only breaking apart when Bobby walked in.

“What happened?” He asked sitting in the chair previously occupied by Michael.  
Castiel told Dean and Bobby what had happened with Michael. Once he was done there was a silence in the room. Eventually Bobby broke it.

“Well, we’ve gotta figure out what Michael has on your dad” Dean nodded staring at the floor.

“I’ll go see what I can dig up, you two get some rest” Bobby declared before leaving the room.  
Dean was still staring at the floor and Castiel felt crushed by the guilt on his shoulders.

“Dean I don’t even know where to begin saying I’m sorry” Castiel started. Dean’s shoulders lifted and dropped in what looked like a laugh, he turned full of anger

“You’re sorry? You’re sorry!?” he harshly said Castiel started speaking before Dean could say anymore, determined to try and fix the mess he made

“Dean I know this is my fault, I never knew I was dragging you into this I swear! I would never put you in harm’s way purposefully” Dean looked at him disbelieving. Fear clamped down Cas throat, he couldn’t say anything more even if he could think of something, he was frozen. Terrified. Dean lunged forward and Castiel flinched expecting a fist to hit him or to be head butted. Castiel did not expect to feel Dean’s lips crushing into his. It wasn’t the soft kisses they’d been sharing recently, this was rough and angry. Castiel was confused, what was this kiss? What did it mean? He gained enough wits and grip on Dean to finally push him from him.

“Dean, I…” Castiel tried to form a sentence but he wasn’t entirely sure what he was trying to say.

“Dammit Cas- I’m not, this isn’t” Dean stopped and breathed deep “This is not your fault, I’m not angry at you, I don’t blame you. I told you once ‘no-one should ever hurt you’ and now Michael and my dad, they both…” Castiel   
wrapped Dean in his arms

“Shhh Dean, it’s ok. Everything is going to be ok” Castiel scooted Dean until they were both lying on the bed. Dean had his head on Castiel’s chest and Castiel petted Dean’s head soothingly dropping kisses to it every now and then. Dean’s breath evened out and Castiel looked down to check he was asleep. They sat like that for a while Castiel waiting for Dean to fall into a deeper sleep before gently untangling himself and getting out the bed. Dean moaned slightly at the loss of his pillow but Castiel pushed a real pillow under his head and kissed him lightly, which seemed to settle him.

Leaving the room Castiel began his search for the red headed nurse. He had a favour to ask. Castiel found her –Charlie as her badge read- at the nurse’s station and asked his favour. She agreed instantly and said

“Absolutely, let me just grab the things” She hurried back into the nurses station and a few moments later returned with everything needed. Castiel took from her some of the objects so they shared the load.   
When they got back into the room Castiel motioned for Charlie to be quiet as Dean was still asleep. Charlie moved over to the television and plugged in the box she was carrying. She placed the remote next to it.

“If you need any help, just come find me. This is a super sweet idea Castiel” she whispered before walking out the room and leaving Castiel to finish setting things up. Castiel put down two of the three boxes he was carrying, from the one remaining he pulled out the contents. There were multiple discs but reading them all Cas quickly identified the first one. He plucked it from its cover and inserted it into the box Charlie had set up. A few clicks with the remote   
and suddenly music was blaring. Dean stirred and grumbled.

“Cas? Why is Lord of the Rings blaring?” he asked sitting up and sleepily rubbing his eyes. Castiel hurriedly turned the volume down and took in the adorable sight of a just woken up Dean.

“I’m sorry Dean, it was a surprise but I did not mean to wake you from your nap” Dean looked as if he couldn’t comprehend what Cas had said. 

“But since you are now awake, would you like to watch Lord of the Rings with me?” Castiel asked shyly. Dean immediately perked up

“Hell yeah!” Castiel smiled with relief and joined Dean on the bed. They sat together and snuggled, Dean tried to recreate the make outs from the last time they watched the film but this time Castiel was paying attention and enjoying the film too much. Dean huffed as Castiel flicked him away for the fifth time. When Dean held the second disc ransom it was Castiel’s turn to huff. Cas gave Dean the required amount of attention before managing to wrangle the disc from him. 

“Fine I just hope you know that Gandalf di-“ Dean was cut off by lips plastered against his, Castiel nipped gently at Dean’s bottom lip, he deepened the kiss and moved Dean so he was supporting himself above him. Castiel kept kissing Dean swallowing the spoilers laced on his lips. It was the most intense kiss they’d shared for a while. Castiel had just intended it as a distraction, a way to stop Dean from spoiling the movie but the more they touched the less interested in the film he became. His entire body screamed for contact with Dean. Castiel dragged his hands over Dean’s body, pulling him down into him. Dean sank into Castiel’s lap moaning his name.

Castiel flinched and groaned in pain, Dean immediately jumped up and away from Cas.

“Cas!? What happened?” Dean stared down at Castiel terrified

“You lent on the burns on my leg, I’m alright” he reassured Dean 

“Fuck, I am so sorry Cas, you sure you’re ok?” Dean carefully sat back down slightly further away from Castiel. 

“I’m fine Dean, really!” Castiel grabbed at Dean and pulled him closer, Dean moved but still kept a gap between them. Dean rubbed at the back of his neck

“I guess we’re still not ready for anything too heavy” he leant closer and tenderly kissed Castiel on the lips. He pulled away far too quickly for Castiel’s liking. Dean flicked the movie back to the place it had been when they’d become distracted. Dean tugged at Castiel’s hand and held it while they settled and continued watching the Lord of the Rings. They were half way through the third film when Garth popped his head in the door.

“Hey guys, just dropping in to tell you that we’re really happy with your progress so we are gonna discharge you both tomorrow. You’re going home” Dean squeezed Castiel’s hand happily.

“Hear that Cas we’re going home!” he said a smile breaking out. Castiel’s face fell. 

“Cas? What’s wrong?” Dean asked worried at Castiel’s sunken appearance

“Dean, my house burnt down… I don’t have a home to go to” Cas said solemnly 

“Cas… shit I’m sorry. I just assumed you would come home with me to Bobby’s” Dean answered angry at himself for being so insensitive.

“Really? I can go with you? Bobby won’t mind?” Castiel asked hopeful, he didn’t want to be apart from Dean. Not now. 

“Of course you can! I’m pretty sure Bobby just assumed as well” Dean kissed Castiel’s hand and they sat and watched the rest of the film.

The most peaceful either of them had been a long time.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean opened his eyes. It was morning judging by the sun shining through the window. The TV was switched off, one of the nurses must have turned it off because Cas was definitely asleep before it finished and Dean didn’t remember seeing the end. Dean went to stretch when he realised Cas was still snuggled up against him, Dean looked down at his sleeping boyfriend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks everyone for reading, I hope you're still enjoying this little story of mine!
> 
> Thank you to those leaving kudos and comments, it makes me so happy! 
> 
> Enjoy the chapter and please let me know what you think :)

Dean opened his eyes. It was morning judging by the sun shining through the window. The TV was switched off, one of the nurses must have turned it off because Cas was definitely asleep before it finished and Dean didn’t remember seeing the end. Dean went to stretch when he realised Cas was still snuggled up against him, Dean looked down at his sleeping boyfriend.

“Just like an angel” he whispered to himself as he brushed a strand of hair from Castiel’s forehead. Castiel moaned happily and a small smile crept on his lips as Dean continued to stroke his fingers through Cas’ hair. Dean stared down at Castiel enjoying the look of serenity on his face. It suddenly dawned on Dean Castiel was moving in with him. They would be living together, he almost choked on the commitment of it but as he looked down at Castiel’s head resting on his chest and saw the happiness there, any fear was gone, replaced by the excitement of waking up and seeing Castiel first thing in the morning, every morning.

With a giant grin on his face Dean ran his finger down Cas’ nose. Castiel wriggled away from the contact and buried his face into Dean’s chest. Dean laughed at the angry little huff Cas made at being disturbed. In his happiness, seeing Castiel’s head bob up and down as Dean laughed only furthered his amusement soon Dean was laughing so hard he had tears in his eyes and just about threw Cas from the bed.

Castiel looked at Dean rubbing his eyes grumpily.

“I was having a nice dream” he whined Dean wiped a tear from his cheek and stifled his giggles

“Oh? What about?” Dean asked. Castiel flushed bright pink and looked away from Dean, who shuffled forward until he was sitting directly in front of Cas.

“One of those dreams was it?” Dean said teasingly. “Was I in it?” he asked seductively inching closer to Castiel.

“N-no” Castiel tripped over the word trying to look away from Dean. Dean brushed his lips over Castiel’s neck relishing the slight gasp Cas gave. He moved his head until he was looking up at Castiel’s blue eyes.

“I don’t believe you Cas” Dean pushed Castiel’s arms out of his lap and straddled the now vacant space.  Dean leaned forward again and nuzzled at Castiel’s neck.

Castiel wriggled beneath Dean and cleared his throat. Dean felt the movement and looked at Castiel with one eyebrow raised in question.

“Dean, I believe Bobby will be arriving with Sam any moment and I’d rather he not walk in on us… again” Dean laughed, Cas did have point.

“Shame” Dean sighed, kissing Castiel but pulling away before he could retaliate. In one swift movement Dean was out of Cas’ lap and standing on the floor. He began packing all the things he’d had in hospital with him.

Bobby and Sam arrived soon after and he had to admit he was glad Cas had put an end to their antics or else everyone would be very embarrassed right now.  Sam took Dean and Castiel’s bags out to Bobby’s car as Bobby dealt with paper work. Nurse Charlie came to say bye and get her dvd’s back and Garth told Dean and Cas about how to look after themselves out of hospital. It was mostly stay out of trouble but Cas did get given medication for his burns, that were healing up nicely, according to Garth.

They all walked outside and joined Sam at the car. On the way back Sam rode shot gun so Dean and Cas could hold hands in the back of the car. Dean was embarrassed at first but then he remembered full on kissing Cas in front of Bobby and Sam so he figured this display of affection was actually not all that bad and he began to relax and enjoy the steady weight of Cas’ hand in his. It made the car ride better and it seemed to make Cas happy too, the only downside was the grin Sam had when he spotted their clasped hands. Dean knew he was in for a fun ride with that but he couldn’t bring himself to care at that moment.  

They arrived and Dean found himself sad to lose the contact Cas had been providing, his hand now felt cold and empty but it wasn’t practical to hold hands and get out of the car and get their bags so they reluctantly parted. They’d have time together later.

Dean walked up to the door, he was happy to be home and better yet he was home with Cas. Bobby opened the door and shooed everyone inside.

Dean walked in and the first thing he saw was a giant banner in his brother’s messy writing.

_‘Welcome home Cas & Dean!’ _

“Sammy you do this?” He asked his little brother who was standing shyly by the door.

“Me and Bobby, it’s great to have you back” Sam said lunging forward and engulfing Dean in a hug. Dean squeezed his brother back touched at the effort they went to, there were even balloons. Breaking the hug Sam said

“That’s not even the best bit” and ran off in the direction of the kitchen, Bobby following behind. Dean looked over at Castiel and saw his staring at the banner.

“Cas? You ok?” he asked walking over to him

“Yes, I just didn’t expect…” Cas gestured at the banner. Dean wrapped his arms around Cas from behind and hugged him. With his chin rested on Castiel’s shoulder he whispered in Cas ear

“You’re part of the family… baby” at the addition of the pet name Castiel tore his gaze from the banner and turned in Dean’s arms to return the hug.

“COME ON GUYS!” Sam shouted through from the kitchen “STOP MAKING OUT AND COME SEE THE BEST PART”

Dean laughed and took Castiel’s hand and pulled him to the kitchen. Dean was never really one for holding hands but he liked how Cas’ was soft and warm and how he rubbed Dean’s thumb with his own making him feel safe, happy and loved. Yeah he really liked holding hands with Cas. They walked into the kitchen and were greeted by one of the best sights Dean has ever seen. Pie. The table was covered in different types of pie. Dean felt his mouth watering at the view.

“I told you this was the best part!” Sam smiled gleefully. “There is pecan, apple, cherry, lemon meringue and chocolate” he finished

“Wow Sam, not complaining or anything but why so much pie?” Dean asked as his usually health conscious brother normally limited Dean’s pie intake.

“We weren’t sure what Cas would like so we got a selection” Sam answered with a shrug. Dean looked over at Castiel and squeezed his hand. Cas looked overcome with emotion.  It hurt to Dean to think he was so happy because someone thought to be considerate to him. In that moment Dean promised to anyone who was up above that he would treasure Castiel so much he never questioned why someone would be kind to him again.

“So Cas, what do you fancy?” He asked determined to make this the best home coming Cas had ever had while also hoping it was the only one.

“The pecan looks particularly good” Cas commented trying to not tear at the kind gesture. Dean couldn’t help himself he leaned into Cas and pressed a kiss to his cheek

“My favourite, good choice Cas” He said before pushing Castiel into a seat. Bobby pulled out a knife and cut the pecan pie before placing a slice in front of Castiel, who forked it into his mouth groaning at the sweet taste. Dean was so distracted by Castiel’s happy noises he didn’t notice there was pie sitting right in front of him until both Bobby and Sam started laughing. Dean finally looked away from Castiel and managed to block out his moans enough to eat his own pie. It was a damn good pie and Dean was looking forward to trying the others but more so he was looking forward to hearing Castiel’s response to the other flavours. They finished their pie and spent a while talking things over.

Castiel yawned and it cause Dean to yawn as well

“How about you boys go take a nap, you’re not up to full speed yet” Bobby suggested

Dean tugged a sleepy Cas upstairs to their room- his room? No their room, they shared it now. Dean pushed the door open and pulled Castiel in

“Hey Cas?” Dean asked

“Yes Dean?” Castiel responded stifling another yawn

“Which side of the bed do you like?” Dean enquired staring at the bed as if it was a problem to be solved.

“Whichever you don’t prefer” Castiel asked collapsing on right side. Dean just laughed and crawled in next to him, he pulled the duvet over them and Dean realised with a shock it was the first time since he’d been kidnapped by his dad that he’d been in his own bed. It didn’t even smell like him anymore, it smelt of Cas. Not that Dean minded it comforted him as he drifted into sleep, surrounded by Castiel.

_Another fist collided with Dean’s face. His eyes were swollen and his entire face hurt but still his father threw his fist into it. Dean was on the ground a moment away from unconsciousness when from the corner of his eye he saw Cas. He was dangling from a rope in the ceiling by his wrists, his head slumped._

_“Cas” he croaked before his father’s foot hit him in the ribs_

_“I’m ending this now Dean” his father growled pulling a gun from his jacket and aiming at Castiel, his finger squeezed the trigger and a loud bang echoed through the room. The air was forced from Dean’s lungs as watched the front of Cas’ body rapidly turn a sickly red. Dean forced himself up and stumbled forward covering the bullet hole. He managed to untie Castiel who slummed forward onto Dean. He lowered them both to the floor mutter words of comfort. He pushed on the wound praying, begging for it to magically heal, for him to move his hand and see the white of Cas’ shirt. But it didn’t, Dean saw the shirt stained red and his hand covered in the sticky life force currently draining from Cas._

_Dean pushed his jacket off and took off his own shirt using it to try and stop the bleeding. Castiel groaned as the shirt came in contact with him but his eyes opened._

_“Dean?” Castiel whispered reaching a hand forward to tenderly touch Dean’s face._

_“Yeah, It’s me I-I’m here Cas” he answered trying to hold back the hysterical sobs threatening to break him._

_“Shh-“ Castiel coughed, blood spluttering from his mouth “it’s ok Dean” he wiped a tear that had fallen away with his thumb_

_“Course it is, you’re gonna be fine” Dean covered Castiel’s hand with his own_

_“No, Dean, but that’s ok” Castiel said as his eyes started to glaze over. The life that inhabited them fading and the light of Castiel’s existences dimmed into nothing. Dean stared at the empty eyes, they were still attractive but they lacked the beauty of Castiel._

_“Cas?” Dean whispered gently jarring Castiel “CAS!” Dean screamed powerfully shaking Castiel now trying to force life back into him._

_“No no you can’t, can’t leave me Cas” Dean sobbed over Castiel’s unresponsive corpse_

“CASSSSSSS” Dean screamed jerking into a sitting position arms flew around him

“I’m here Dean. I’m right here” he soothed. Dean turned into him and placed his hand over Castiel’s heart. The reassuring thump, thump, thump convinced Dean Castiel was truly alive and with him.

“Can’t die Cas” Dean cried into Castiel’s shoulder “can’t get hurt” Castiel patted Dean’s head soothingly

“Shhh Dean I’m fine, you’re fine” he reassured

They sat like that until they heard a knock at the door followed by furious shouting.


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What do you think it is?” dean whispered into the quiet of the room.
> 
> “I fear it may be either your father or Michael” Castiel glumly reasoned nestling his face into Dean’s shoulder. Dean let out a hollow laugh bumping Castiel’s face slightly.
> 
> “Hmm… which would you rather?” Dean asked sarcastically
> 
> “Neither is preferable” Castiel responded dryly. Dean hoped, prayed for a moment’s peace. A moment where they could sit and not be worried, scared or in a life threatening situation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow chapter 20... I'm honestly surprised I made it this far and Kylea I owe half of that to you! The other half is you lovely reader your comments, kudos and simply reading this fic is incredibly motivating and just wonderful!!
> 
> Thank you!! Enjoy the chapter :)

Dean stilled in Castiel’s arms as they both strained to hear the commotion coming from below. Sinking further into Castiel, Dean could feel his arms tighten around him and was grateful for the comfort Castiel offered.

“What do you think it is?” dean whispered into the quiet of the room.

“I fear it may be either your father or Michael” Castiel glumly reasoned nestling his face into Dean’s shoulder. Dean let out a hollow laugh bumping Castiel’s face slightly.

“Hmm… which would you rather?” Dean asked sarcastically

“Neither is preferable” Castiel responded dryly. Dean hoped, prayed for a moment’s peace. A moment where they could sit and not be worried, scared or in a life threatening situation.

Dean pushed free from Cas’ arms and grabbed his hand pulling him to follow after him. He pulled Cas behind him to the door, opened it and they both walked out. The voices were louder and they both recognised the voice. It was John. Dean felt a sharp pull at his hand as Castiel tried to hold him back. Refusing to move Dean stilled Castiel’s pulling but turned and faced him and in the blue of his eyes Dean could see the fear residing there. He walked Castiel backwards into the bedroom, slowly let go of his hand and instead held his face. Leaning forward Dean kissed Castiel soft and gently, trying to calm him. He pulled apart and pushed Castiel further into the room before walking back out and closing the door to separate them.

There was a pull at Dean’s heart, leaving Castiel while he was so scared was horrific but Sam was down there and Dean had to know what was happening downstairs, if they were in danger.

Dean walked back towards the raised voices descending the stairs, reaching the bottom Dean saw Sammy standing behind Bobby who held a gun aimed at his father’s head. The shouting stopped and everyone turned to face Dean.

“Dean take your brother up stairs and stay there” Bobby took one hand off the gun to push Sam towards Dean. Sam stumbled over and Dean moved so he was behind him on the stairs. A final look between Bobby and John and Dean turned to take Sam back up the stairs. When he turned around he was greeted by Castiel’s too pale face.

“Dean” Castiel said putting an arm on his shoulder. Dean shot a look at his father, John had a face of thunder and his eyes burnt with hatred as he looked at Castiel.

“Come on” Dean said hurriedly pushing both Sam and Castiel up the stairs. In that moment Dean was grateful Bobby had a gun on his father or who know what John would have done. The voices of arguing could still be heard as the three of them all walked sombrely to Dean’s bedroom. When they reached the room they all walked inside and collapsed on the bed.

Castiel sat up against the headboard with his knees bent up and his arms wrapped around them. Dean wriggled forward and pulled Castiel’s arms away shuffling until he was placed in between Cas’ knees with his arms wrapped around him. Sitting with his back to Castiel’s stomach Dean could feel the gentle rise and fall of his every breath and it soothed him in a way he didn’t know he needed. Dean melted into Castiel until he felt small tremors by his leg. He looked over and saw Sam’s shoulders shaking.

“Sammy?” he asked gently hoping to not add further stress to his little brother.

“I’m fine Dean” Sam sniffled

“No, you’re not Sam. None of us are fine because none of this is fine!” what small calm Castiel had offered was lost. Dean was close to panicking his chest seized and Dean could hardly breathe. Small circles were being rubbed into his back and a steady weight landed on his thighs. Dean looked and saw Sam’s head resting on him. The mix of Castiel and Sam surrounding him manages to open Dean’s chest up again and his breathing relaxed. He slumped back against Castiel. Dean didn’t know how much more of this he could take, his life had never been incredibly easy but now it involved attempted murder. It was crazy. Dean just wanted to be with Cas, it was so simple.

There was a sharp knock at the door and Dean froze, he grabbed onto Sam and Cas.

“Boy’s its Bobby. I’m coming in” The door swung open slowly a second later to reveal Bobby now unarmed.

“Your dad is gone.” Everyone visibly relaxed at the statement but Dean could still see the tension in Bobby’s stance.

“So what’s the bad news?” Dean asked afraid of what the answer could be.

“You’re father told me why he did what he did… and son none of this is going to be easy to hear” Bobby looked pained at the idea of having to tell them this. Dean moved forward until he was sitting on the edge of the bed.

“What is it Bobby?” Dean prepared himself

“Oh where to start” Bobby groaned “John was working for Michael, this you all know and he was doing it because… well because you’ve got a kid brother” Bobby paused allowing Sam and Dean to swallow the information. A bother, he had another brother and John never mentioned it.

“What’s his name?” Sam asked as the thought occurred to him.

“Adam, Adam Milligan. He’s your half-brother” Dean couldn’t wrap his head around it.

“Forgive me” Castiel said placing a hand on Dean’s shoulder “but why does that mean he would need to work for Michael?”

“Adam is sick, very sick. Michael is working on a new drug that can help him. It’s ready but boy does it cost a buck or two” Bobby supplied

“So John was paying in service rather than money” Castiel thought aloud connecting the dots

“And the service was the murder of Cas” Dean finished almost shaking with anger. “Is he going to come after Cas again?”

“No Dean, that’s not going to happen” Bobby answered determinedly

“Does that mean Adam is going to die?” Sam asks

Bobby just nods his head glumly. Dean felt a pang in his heart, his brother was dying. He’d never met him but he was family. That didn’t mean he was going to let Cas die though, he wouldn’t let his father kill anyone.

“Perhaps I can convince Michael to give Adam the medication he needs” Castiel suggested into the hopeless atmosphere.

“Cas! No. You listen to me, you’re not going anywhere near him” Dean exclaimed almost hitting Castiel turning to face him so fast.

“Well I can call him then?”

“No Cas, I-“ Dean inhaled sharply “You need to stay away from him completely”

“But Dean this might be the best chance of-“ Sam started to say

“Sammy no! We put Castiel in danger at the hospital to get information, we’re not putting him anywhere near more danger” Dean argued

“Sam is right, I have to try Dean. It could save your brother” Castiel was trying to reason with him, he could hear it in his tone

“Guys? Will you give us a minute please?” Dean directed at Bobby and Sam

“Come on Sam” Bobby said even though Sam had already begun rising. Dean waited until both Bobby and Sam had left and closed the door behind them. At the fading sound of their footsteps Dean rounded on Castiel.

“God damn it Cas! You can’t go willingly putting yourself into these situations. The guy want’s you dead!” anger was rising in Dean and he was becoming increasingly forceful in his words

“He hired someone else to do it, he obviously isn’t willing to get blood on his own hands, he won’t harm me” Castiel wrapped his arms around Dean and rubbed at his arms. But Dean could not be consoled and he threw them off.

“You’re insane! You want to willing meet someone who tried to kill you. These situations seem to be creeping into our lives anyway without throwing ourselves into them.” Why could Castiel not understand how mad this whole plan was? Like they need more life threatening situations, they’d already been in hospital once.

“I don’t have to meet him, I can just call him and your dad can go and meet him?” Castiel suggested once again putting a soothing hand on Dean.

“Why are you doing this Cas? You don’t have to help John. You shouldn’t even want to so why?” Dean accepted Castiel’s hand this time and covered it with his own instead of shaking it off. 

“Because I can potentially help save someone’s life and not just anyone, your brother Dean.  He’s innocent in all of this and he deserves help” Castiel justified as if it was the simplest decision in the world.

“How’d I end up with someone like you?”  Dean twisted so he faced Castiel without breaking the contact of their hands.

“You must have had a very bad past life” Castiel joked smiling slightly.

“No, no don’t you do that. Don’t even joke like that” Dean moved their connected hands into his lap and stared at them

“You are too… you’re… you’re more than I could wish for Cas. More than I deserve” Dean fiddled with Castiel’s fingers looping his through them and stroking their length.

“Dean” Castiel breathed pulling his hand from him. Dean reluctantly gave it up feeling the loss instantly. When a hand snaked its way around Dean’s neck though Dean relaxed into it enjoying how the pressure and movements felt on his muscles. He groaned slightly as some tension evaporated and moved so his forehead lent on Castiel’s shoulder, he gripped Castiel’s back and tenderly rubbed it. He moved down towards Cas’ lower back and as his hand reached just above his waistband Cas squealed and jumped away, knocking Dean’s head with his shoulder.

“Ow- what the-“ Dean held his head and rubbed at the sore spot although the pain was already fading.

“Cas? Are you ok? Did I hurt you?”  Dean looked Castiel over and was relieved to see there were no signs of pain from him but instead Cas radiated embarrassment.

“Cas?” Dean edged forward slowly and obvious in his movements.

“I’m fine Dean, you just…” Castiel trailed off

“Just?” Dean encouraged, not willing to let the subject drop

“I’m fairly ticklish in certain areas and that is one of them” he answered picking a bit of fluff from the bedspread

“Oh, well I’m glad I didn’t hurt you” Dean was sitting in front of Castiel once again and a plan began to form in his mind. A small smirk tainted Dean’s lips and Castiel’s eyes widened as he read the signs. He threw both hands up immediately to stop Dean before he started.

“My burns are still too tender for that kind of play” he reminded Dean. Dean deflated slightly, the reminder that he couldn’t do something as normal as tickle his boyfriend because his dad tried to blow them both up slapped him hard. He elected instead to lie down next to Castiel and gently pull him with him.

They lay next to each other hands entwined saying nothing. The weight of everything still lay heavy on Dean but he pushed it away, allowing himself to enjoy this moment and breathe in Castiel.  Dean looked over Castiel, he looked at the hair that sat atop his head and the slight crinkles by his eyes, he took in the blue that still managed to surprise him and leave him breathless, his arms hidden slightly by a tee they were toned and nicely shaped. There was definitely strength in his arms.

Continuing Dean gazed over Castiel’s stomach and remembered when he had seen it wet and shining, it was a fond memory of Dean’s, one of the tenderest he owned. Then again with Cas he was stocking up on tender moments, it was nice. Dean realised suddenly his gaze was at Castiel’s crotch, he felt an uncomfortable prickle at the back of his neck and quickly glanced back up at Castiel hoping he hadn’t been caught in the act.

Thankfully Castiel was not watching Dean instead his eyes were closed and Dean suddenly became aware of the light snoring he could hear. Dean stopped his visual examination of Castiel and gave his hand a gentle kiss.

“Good night Cas” he whispered closing his own eyes. Sleep did not fully greet Dean however, he stayed constantly on the edge. His mind was swarming with too many thoughts to completely shut down and a frustrating mixture to top it off. Behind his closed lids Dean would see Castiel’s wet torso and stride forward to dry it but once he reached Castiel and placed a hand to his stomach the water would turn to blood and Dean would wake up.

When Dean’s startled awake for what must be the hundredth time, something felt different and wrong. Trying to push the feeling away Dean gropes around for Cas, coming up empty he pushes his eyes open and sees the empty place Castiel should be filling. Putting his hand over it as if hoping Castiel will suddenly materialise Dean realises it’s not even warm. Panic sweeps through him and before he can stop himself he’s screaming

“CASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!”


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel woke up as Dean flailed and mumbled against him, he heard his name being muttered and what sounded a lot like blood. Cradling Dean as best he could Castiel tried to soothe his boyfriend from his nightmare. Peaking over Dean, Cas saw his cell lying on the bedside table and decided to check the time. He was unlikely to get anymore sleep and hoped it was a reasonable hour.
> 
> Once Dean was suitably relaxed and seemed in a deep enough sleep Castiel rolled him away and peeled his limbs from him. Dean mumbled slightly but calmed once Cas pulled the covers up and tucked Dean in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter has a bit of smut towards the end... this is my first time writing smut so I apologise if it isn't great. I just hope you enjoy the chapter
> 
> Please please let me know what you think :)
> 
> Thank you so much for reading, commenting and leaving kudos- it makes me very happy!
> 
> Enjoy :D

Castiel woke up as Dean flailed and mumbled against him, he heard his name being muttered and what sounded a lot like blood. Cradling Dean as best he could Castiel tried to soothe his boyfriend from his nightmare. Peaking over Dean, Cas saw his cell lying on the bedside table and decided to check the time. He was unlikely to get anymore sleep and hoped it was a reasonable hour.

Once Dean was suitably relaxed and seemed in a deep enough sleep Castiel rolled him away and peeled his limbs from him. Dean mumbled slightly but calmed once Cas pulled the covers up and tucked Dean in.

Plucking the cell as quietly as possible from the nightstand he pressed a button watching it flicker to life and show the time. It was just past six in the morning, Castiel placed the phone back. He looked at Dean sleeping so peacefully, he was half tempted to just crawl back in next to him but there was something else he had to do and he had to do it while Dean was asleep.

Castiel plodded down stairs nervous of what he had to do but determined none the less.  Quickly Castiel made a coffee and sat by Bobby’s phone. He sipped his coffee and dialled the number. It was received on the third ring.

“Hello Michael” Castiel spoke into the dimly lit room.

“Well well well… Cassie this is a surprise. Now why would you be calling me?”

“You are going to give John the drugs he needs” Castiel bluntly stated

“Oh Castiel but I’m not, he didn’t earn them. This conversation is proof of that”

“You will. Your whole business relies on reputation and I swear to god I will end yours. I will not stop and I will tear it all down” Castiel punctuated the last few words allowing his anger to make his words sound more threatening and confident than he felt.

There was a notable silence from Michael’s end so Castiel continued

“But, if you help John then I will leave it alone. I won’t tell anyone and when you get a new house I won’t  live with you, I’ll stay here and you can tell people whatever you want about me” Castiel paused breathing deeply hoping Michael wouldn’t hear it.

“I’m supposed to believe you would just do that?” Michael asked

“All I ask is you help John and that Anna stays also. I won’t leave her with you”

Silence again from Michael.

“Michael?”

“We have a deal” He finally agreed “I’ll call you when you can pick up your delivery”

“Mr. Winchester will be the one to pick up the ‘delivery’”

“As you wish” Michael said before hanging up.

Castiel exhaled a deep breath and put the phone back. He picked up his coffee and brought it to his lips to take a sip-

“CASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!” the blood curdling scream echoed through the house and Castiel dropped his coffee and ran towards Dean’s room.

He threw himself up the stairs tripping as he went but pushing forward anyway. He crashed through the door and saw the terrified expression on his face. Without a seconds thought Castiel climbed over to Dean and held him.

“I’m here Dean, I’m right here” he soothed

“I thought- I thought you’d-“ Dean mumbled as he pushed his face into the crook of Castiel’s neck.  

Bobby appeared at the door he glanced around the room, looking for the threat. He looked at Castiel and Dean

“You boys alright in here?”

“We’re fine” Dean mumbled into Castiel’s shoulder. Castiel nodded to Bobby in case he hadn’t heard Dean.

“Well if you’re sure, I’ll go tell Sam then” he said, Castiel nodded once more and Bobby left.

Turning his attention back to Dean, Castiel ran his hands down Dean’s back. He’d stopped shaking and his breathing had evened out to Castiel’s relief. He kept his hands moving to make sure Dean was soothed. Castiel felt a push from Dean’s head and was about to ask what was wrong when he fell backwards and Dean snuggled into his side.

“Cas… I thought you’d done something stupid” Dean said looking directly at Castiel, who felt uncomfortable under Dean’s gaze for the first time. He squirmed under his focus.

“Cas?” Dean asked now resting on his elbow to get a better look.

“I didn’t do anything stupid Dean” Castiel answered he moved his arm to pull Dean back down but he swatted it away.

“Cas, what have you done?” he demanded sitting bolt upright. Castiel followed the action so now he was looking direct at Dean.

“I helped to potentially save a life, Dean” Castiel gritted out.

“Cas… I… We talked about this…” Castiel could see the anger in Dean rising.

“I couldn’t just leave him to die” Cas argued trying to keep his calm.

“So you’re just going to offer yourself up instead, do you know how crazy that is?” Dean slammed his fist into the bed next to his knee.

“No, Dean your father will go and see Michael, not me. I won’t be anywhere near him” Dean’s head sank. Castiel hated seeing him this stressed.

“Dean, you have to understand that I had to try and help, I couldn’t just pretend Adam didn’t exist or that I couldn’t help him” Castiel reasoned, he picked at a thread on his leg, looking at Dean was too hard right now.

“I’m sorry Dean. I had to try” He said resolutely.

“I know Cas. You had to try, but you have to stop gambling with your life. I can’t take it anymore, I can’t, won’t lose you” Castiel felt Dean’s hand on his leg and finally looked up to meet his eyes.

“You won’t have to” Castiel leant forward and rested his forehead on Dean’s “I promise” he whispered.

They sat together breathing in the calm and peace of the moment they’d found. Castiel felt a niggling he couldn’t shake and pulled away from Dean who grumbled and let his head fall until it was rested on Cas’ chest. Castiel relaxed at Dean’s movement and wrapped his hands around the head now resting on his chest.

“Do you want to know what’s going to happen, the plan?” Castiel reluctantly asked. Dean shook his head against Castiel’s chest and pushed away from him.

“No, I don’t” He said getting from the bed and walking away from Cas. Castiel’s heart dropped he knew he shouldn’t have mentioned it again. He should have pushed down the feeling that urged him to talk about it. Now Dean was upset again and Castiel just wanted to hold him again but now he was so far away.

“Not until after breakfast” Dean said turning towards the music player he had. “And before we go for breakfast I want to spend some time with my boyfriend without attempted murders, plots, homophobic slurs and anything life threatening” Dean pressed a button on the player and the intro to Stairway to Heaven filled the room.

“Mmm I like this song” Cas hummed as Dean walked back over and crawled next to him.

“Cas, you’re awesome” Dean said smiling to him.

“Thank you Dean” Cas replied bobbing his head to the music “You are rather remarkable yourself” Castiel began tapping his fingers along to the rhythm. Dean placed his hand over Castiel’s and entwined their fingers. Cas now tapping their joined fingers to the beat.

“Cas?” Dean asked almost shyly

“Hmm” He acknowledged as he closed his eyes swaying slightly to the music.

“What’s the furthest you’ve gone?” he questioned, Castiel felt Dean’s hand squirm in his slightly.

“Well with Michael, we-“ Cas started only to be interrupted by Dean

“WHAT!?” Cas’ eyes flew open at Dean’s interruption

“Well he travelled a lot for work and he took us with him” he explained

“CAS!”

“So Scotland” they said at the same time.

“Wait, Scotland?” Castiel couldn’t understand why Dean looked so confused.

“Yes Dean, it’s the furthest I’ve ever been” Castiel squinted at Dean trying to understand his reaction when he noticed Dean’s eyes looking watery. He collapsed on the bed shaking, Castiel panicked fearful for Dean until a roaring laughter drowned out the guitar solo of ‘Stairway to Heaven’.

“Dean?” Castiel tried but Dean continued to laugh uncontrollably “Dean, I don’t understand, what is funny?”  Dean let go of Castiel’s hand and moved them to cover his stomach. Cas had mixed feelings about this, although he didn’t get the joke seeing Dean laugh like this was a beautiful sight to behold one that made it impossible not to smile. But now he also wasn’t holding Dean’s hand and Castiel missed the contact.

Dean took in three long shuddering breaths as his laughter resided into a small chuckle and a smirk. Castiel stretched his arm to reclaim Dean’s hand now it lay on the bed but as soon as Dean looked at Castiel it flew from him once again and Castiel huffed. His expression resembling a pout as he tried not to smile at the carefree joy that Dean was displaying.

Dean tried to control himself again, he repeated the breathing and this time he took Cas’ hand squeezing it as to ready himself as he looks at Castiel. Castiel stared at Dean until he looked up at him, he only smirked and looked down exhaling once before clearing his throat and eventually could meet Cas’ eyes without collapsing into a fit of laughter.

“Don’t ever change” Dean said to Castiel as he looked at him fondly

“I still don’t understand what was funny?” Castiel asked smiling

“I meant how far have you gone… intimately Cas not geographically” Dean answered twiddling Cas’ fingers in his own.  

“Oh” Cas gasped blushing as he understood now why Dean was laughing so much.

“Well my experience is mostly limited” Cas explained looking down at his lap

“How limited is mostly?”

“Well, there is what we’ve done…” Castiel tailed off still not looking at Cas. A hand under Cas’ chin made him lift his head until he was looking into the green of Dean’s eyes.

“Just me? You’ve never even kissed someone else?” Dean softly queried

“Just you, people mostly avoided me remember” Castiel answered a sad smile on his face.

“As first relationships go, this one has been pretty intense” Dean said almost sorrowful

“I wouldn’t change it for anything” Castiel reassured. “What’s the furthest you’ve ever been?” Castiel enquired now curious about Dean’s past.

“I’ve got a bit more experience than you” Dean answered his tone hinting at shameful.

“It’s ok Dean, how much is a bit?” he asked squeezing his hand in reassurance and using his own words back at him.

“I’ve kissed a few girls, very few boys and had the occasional fumble. But Cas I swear none of that means anything to me, it’s… it’s you now” Dean stated

“I know Dean I didn’t expect you to be as unexperienced as me. You’re charming, sweet, kind and very attractive” Castiel saw Dean, squirm under the compliment he knew Dean didn’t receive them all that well. So Castiel made double sure that he put as much conviction into his words as was physically possible.

“You think I’m attractive?” Dean joked flirtatiously to deal with the embarrassment of the compliment.

“I think…” Castiel suddenly spurred by a strange confidence surged forward to an inch away from Dean’s face and pecked a kiss to his lips “You” another kiss “are” kiss “very” kiss “attractive” kiss.

Cas moved to pull away from the peck he’d given but Dean followed after him combining their lips again. They broke apart and Dean pushed Castiel down gently until he was lying and followed so he was lying over him. Castiel looked up into Dean’s eyes and felt the pressure of Dean’s leg in between his, their crotches tantalisingly close.  

Castiel pushed up until his lips met Dean’s, he wound an arm around his back, hand bunching material in his fist. Cas wished he could push his other hand through Dean’s hair but it was currently supporting him. It took him a moment in the kissing haze to realise he can lie down and free his other hand, using the one on Dean’s back Castiel pushed him and lowered with him. Success. His hand was free and now running through Dean’s wonderful hair, his nails scraping ever so slightly on his scalp.

At the moan Cas felt against his lips, the action was appreciated.

“Cas” Dean whispered moving his lips to Castiel’s neck where they were currently kissing. Cas stretched his neck in order to give Dean better access. As good as it feels, Cas wants to do the same to Dean he wants to trail him leaving a slick track with his tongue. Cas needed to kiss Dean now his blood was boiling for it. He moved his hands to cup Dean’s face and pulled it back to his. Castiel took Dean’s lower lip between his teeth as Dean rearranged their lips he released it allowing his teeth to graze it earning another moan from Dean.

“You gotta lose this” Dean grumbled between kisses tugging at Cas’ top. Dean was having a very physical effect on Cas, he was flushed red and his dick was beginning to strain in his pants. Castiel began pulling his shirt up finding it difficult lying down. Dean straddled Castiel’s waist sitting up to help Cas to pull off his shirt.

Dean wiggled in his effort to pull Cas’ top off and the movement vibrated through Castiel’s cock causing him to gasp.

“Dean”

“I’m right here, Cas” Dean said his voice low and rumbling over Castiel’s skin. Castiel pushed Dean’s shirt up eager to feel Dean’s skin on his. Quickly coming to Cas’ aid Dean pulled his shirt off as well and threw into the abyss that existed outside of the bed. As soon as Dean’s shirt was off Castiel pulled him back into him, flush against each other bare chested Castiel groaned as his hands roamed feeling every inch of Dean.  Dean wiggled again adjusting his position and Castiel could feel Dean hard against his own erection. A deep groan slipped from his lips as his hips bucked up to chase the feeling.

Dean looked down at him questioningly.

“Cas I’d like to try something, if you’d let me?” He asked strangely innocent for their situation but in a breathless gravelly voice that made Cas say yes.

“If you want me to stop at any time just say” Castiel began to feel nervous, he trusted Dean he’d die for him, he almost had but this was a nervousness that he wouldn’t be good, that he would let Dean down. Castiel pushed his way from his head, he wanted this.

“Cas, you gotta promise you’ll tell me to stop if it’s too much” he reaffirmed. Castiel swallowed deeply and nodded.

Dean lent down and kissed Castiel, taking all his nerves and fear away in a swirl of his tongue. The kiss helped even Castiel’s breathing and he felt more relaxed too engulfed by the pleasure he was feeling. Dean broke away and started kissing at Castiel’s neck he trailed down and Castiel realised with a start he wasn’t stopping. Dean continued working his way down his lips brushing Castiel’s chest stopping to lick and nip at certain areas, he placed an open mouthed kiss to each of Cas’ hipbones and then looked pointedly at Cas.

Castiel watched as Dean’s hands were at the button of Cas’ pants, he kept watching as Dean undid it and began pulling the zip down. Castiel nodded his head at Dean who was looking for permission. He began pulling Cas’ pants down, lifting his hips and wriggling to help them slip off. Dean moved off from Castiel to allow the pants to slide off. Castiel heard a thump that he assumed was his pants hitting the floor. Dean looked at Castiel again with his hands on the band of his boxers, shyly Cas bobbed his head and Dean pulled them off too.

Castiel felt the cool air brush his hot cock. He closed his eyes at the sensation and tried not think that Dean could see that part of him. Castiel felt a wetness drag up his length and slipped his eyes open to see Dean licking him. The sensation of Dean’s tongue on him triggered a shiver through Castiel, he was already leaking pre-come. He knew he’d never last long especially when the image of Dean with his tongue on him was stuck behind his eyelids. Closing his eyes Castiel relived the moment short pants escaping his mouth.

Castiel felt Dean’s hand trail up his thigh, just on the edge of tickly. There was a shift in the bed and Castiel looked to see Dean leaning off the edge, he popped back up a moment later with a small tube in his hands. He coated one hand in it and Castiel quickly lost interest as Dean kissed at his thigh. Throwing his head back and closing his eyes Cas stretched his hand out wanting to touch Dean who filled Cas’ empty hand with his own.

Castiel felt Dean’s cold slick hand grip him and begin to slide up and down

“Dean, I-“ Castiel breathed breaking off as Dean twisted a certain way.

“It’s ok Cas, I’ve got you” suddenly there were lips back on his thigh combining with teeth to mark him, the combination was causing Cas’ head to spin.

“Deaan” Castiel groaned out, it was all his mind would supply. He wanted to tell Dean how amazing this felt

“So good” he managed to spit out as Dean increased the pace.

“I try” he kissed into Castiel’s thigh

“You- mmm Dean!” Castiel felt a build-up low in his stomach, he was thrusting with Dean.

“I’m” gasping Castiel chased after Dean’s had with his hips

“Close now” A hand clamped down on Cas’ hips hold him still. Castiel hadn’t even felt Dean let go of his hand- his thought was interrupted as Dean took the head of Castiel’s cock into his mouth licking at it, it was overwhelming.

“Dean I’m… I’m going to” Castiel couldn’t concentrate, he forgot what he was saying as bliss washed through him and Cas screamed

“DEAAANNNNN” as he came into Dean’s mouth. Gasping Castiel sunk into the bed trying to breath and move but he was spent, his muscles refused to contract and he lay there whispering Dean over and over.

“Right here Cas” Dean said suddenly appearing by his head. Castiel grabbed at him and pulled him into his arms. Dean kissed him delicately and Castiel could taste the salty remnants of his exuberance.

“Good?” Dean asked laughing slightly

“Very” Castiel happily replied.   


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Come on you, I think you need a shower and some coffee”
> 
> “Mmm” Cas agreed but when Dean loosened his arms, Cas just snuggled in deeper. Dean couldn’t help but to laugh. He pushed Castiel up and got up himself pulling Cas’ reluctant body into the bathroom. Castiel plodded along and stumbled slightly when Dean pushed him into the shower.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone so much for your continued support. It means more to me than I can describe!
> 
> Please enjoy this chapter :D

Dean lay watching Castiel, a small content smile on his lips. It made Dean’s heart soar to see Cas looking happy and knowing that he’d help to give him that. Tightening his arms Dean said

“Come on you, I think you need a shower and some coffee”

“Mmm” Cas agreed but when Dean loosened his arms, Cas just snuggled in deeper. Dean couldn’t help but to laugh. He pushed Castiel up and got up himself pulling Cas’ reluctant body into the bathroom. Castiel plodded along and stumbled slightly when Dean pushed him into the shower.

“Dean, I’m afraid I do not know how to start the water flow” Cas said sounding confused

“It’s the big button with the eye shape thing on it” Dean said searching through the cupboard for soap for Castiel to use.

“It does not appear to be here Dean” Cas called over to him. Dean groaned slightly

“Oh Cas, here” Dean walked over and ducked his head into the shower, still wearing his jeans he didn’t want to get in completely or he’d be soaked by the splash. Dean pushed the button and the water started sprinkling down, he managed to get out in time before getting wet.

Pointing towards the dial on the shower Dean said

“That’s the temperat-“ Dean suddenly found himself lurching forward and under the water stream. Blinking multiple times Dean tried to blink the water from his eyes and rubbed a hand over his face. He looked at  up Castiel who was staring down at Dean’s now soaking jeans.

“Cas! You sonovabitch. You planned that” Dean stood in shock as his boyfriend had the audacity to just wink. Dean shook his head and laughed. Looking down at his soaking pants Dean decided to just shed them. He unbuttoned them and slid them down. Taking a deep breath he threw them from the shower painfully aware Castiel was seeing him naked for the first time.

Looking at Cas, Dean saw him blush ferociously as he looked over Dean’s dick. Dean looked around the shower awkwardly before coughing.

“Err, Cas… You’re staring” Cas’ eyes shot up wide and he blushed even further under the hot water.

“So-sorry Dean” He mumbled looking away.

“Turn around Cas” Dean said softly.

“But I- yes… ok” Castiel said turning around looking sad. Dean kissed his shoulder

“It’s easier to wash your hair this way” Dean grabbed the shampoo bottle from the corner of the shower and squirted some on his hand.

“Oh” Cas moaned as Dean started massaging the shampoo into his hair. Dean made very sure to use the right pressure and to wash all of Cas’ hair without getting shampoo in his eyes. Dean gently tilted Castiel’s head back and rinsed it free of suds.

Castiel turned around and pulled Dean into kiss. It was soft and tender. Dean had no intention of deepening it, it was sweet.

Sweet shower kisses with Cas were now on Dean’s list of favourite things to do in the morning. Dean roamed Cas’ wet skin with his hands, feeling the muscles tense and relax as Cas’ altered his hold on Dean, maybe just a little deeper.

Dean manoeuvred carefully in the small space not really built for two, until Cas had his back up against the wall and Dean licked at his lips waiting for them to part. Castiel gasped his mouth open and Dean swirled his tongue in. Cas overwhelmed Dean’s senses. He was everything.

So distracted Dean nearly missed that whatever song that was playing stopped but he noticed once Cas had pulled away slightly looking confused.

“Dean? You in the shower?” Sam called. Dean put his finger to his lips to signal Cas’ to stay quiet.

“Yeah, Sammy what’s up?” he shouted back, Castiel stifled a laugh and Dean bit back a gasp as Cas’ hands wandered to cup Dean’s ass. Dean shot him a dirty look.

“Breakfast is ready and Bobby wants to talk” Sam answered. “Where’s Cas I’ll tell him too”

“I’ll –nggh” Was all Dean managed as Cas’ fingers started kneading at Dean’s butt cheeks.

“I’ll pass on the message” Dean spat out before biting his lips to hold back a moan.

“Are you, you’re- EWWWWWWWWW” Dean heard running footsteps and a door slam.

“Cas, you’re very unhelpful” Dean said as he lent forward and kissed the smirk from Cas face.

Eventually pulling away Dean said

“We’d better go for breakfast … and check we haven’t scarred Sammy too much” Dean turned off the water and Cas’ groaned at loss of the heat, plastering himself to Dean as compensation.

“Cas I can’t get the towel with you like that” Dean complained “Oh fine” he said as Cas petted his lip smiling instantly as Dean gave in. Dean walked Cas to the bed and made him sit on it.

“Stay!” He said firmly pointing a finger for emphasis. Dean walked back to the cupboard and grabbed a towel.

“Okay now come” Dean said to Cas as he stood with the towel ready for him.

“I already did” Cas deadpanned tilting his head at Dean who choked on the spit he was swallowing.

“Ok mister, get your cute little naked butt here now… and tonight I’ll make sure you do again” Dean added his best cocky smile and winked for effect. Cas was on his feet in seconds walking towards the open towel. Dean wrapped Cas’ in it and kissed his nose.

“Get dry and put clothes on, I’m starving” Dean said pushing Cas away as he huffed.

Dean wrapped himself in a towel and started drying off concentrating very hard on his own skin and trying mostly unsuccessfully not to think about Cas’. Dean only got distracted once staring at Cas but it did involve him missing the leg of his pants when trying to put them on and falling face first on to the floor. Castiel laughed but graciously helped Dean up and even kissed the little red bits on Dean’s knees where he’d hit the floor and his cheek which was sore from the impact.

“Thanks Cas” Dean had said gently stroking Cas’ cheek.

“Come on Cas, downstairs. Breakfast time” Dean said pushing Castiel forward and slapping his butt on the way.

“That’s for the shower” he stated following Castel to breakfast.

Dean and Cas had barely joined Sam and Bobby at the table when Bobby flicked his fork in Cas’ direction, bits off egg flying off.

“What did you kid?” He asked

“Woah Bobby, give him a minute we haven’t even sat down yet” Dean subconsciously took Cas’ hand stroking his thumb over Cas’. They took their seats and Dean pilled eggs and a couple of pancakes on both their plates. Cas hesitantly took a bite, Bobby and Sam both watching intently.

“Will you leave him alone!? Please. At least give him a coffee before you attack him” Sam stood up to get Cas a coffee sticking his tongue out at Dean who retaliated by stealing a bit bacon from Sam’s plate, splitting it between himself and Cas.

“How come we don’t get any bacon?” Dean asked around his stolen rasher

“Maybe if you hadn’t spent so long ‘showering’” Sam replied handing Castiel his coffee. Dean and Castiel looked at each other and blushed.

“Okay boys settle down. We have to talk” Bobby stated “So Castiel what did you do?”

“I- well I’ve spoken to Michael. He’s agreed to provide the drugs for Adam” Castiel stated nervously gripping Dean’s hand tighter.

“Cas!” Sam said surprised.

“What did that cost you?” Bobby asked.

“I’m afraid, I..” Cas stumbled

“Cas… you never mentioned a cost?” Dean said strengthening his hold on Cas’ hand.

“Michael was never going to give them for free son” Bobby said to Dean

“So what did he want?” Dean asked.

“I said I would leave the family and he could tell people whatever he wanted about me. Me and Anna stay, he can relocate somewhere else. Or if he doesn’t give Adam the medication I would destroy his reputation and thus his life” Cas answered to the room.

“So you’re going to let him get away with everything?” Dean said squeezing Cas’ hand harder than necessary.

“Dean, Dean I had to, for Adam” He said trying to soothe and relax the bone crunching grip Dean had on his hand.   

“Sorry” Dean said looking down at the white marks he’d left on Cas’ hand. Dean slammed his hand on the table and stood up and walked away. He heard talking behind him and someone calling his name but ignored it marching up the stairs and walking into his room slamming the door behind him.

Dean stood in the middle of the room fuming. He paced back and forth, back and forth. Anger spreading through his veins boiling his blood, Dean let out a roar. His hand stung, he looked at it and saw his knuckles red and bloody, he looked at the wall in front of him there was a fist shaped hole in it. The hole morphed into Michael’s smug face and Dean launched his fist back into it.

“Dean!” Cas gasped running forward to Dean’s side.

“He deserves it!” Dean screamed

Bobby appeared next

“How can we just let him walk away from this! He deserves to die” Dean screamed again but didn’t fight as Cas wrapped his arms around him

“We have no choice Dean. It’s ok” Cas said

“No it isn’t” Dean said through gritted teeth

“You need to calm down boy, this isn’t going to help. You’re going to end up scaring Sam” Bobby placated

At the mention of Sam’s name Dean took a deep breath. He looked around and was grateful Sam was nowhere to be seen.

“He’s still down stairs” Bobby answered Dean’s unasked question.

“So you gotta stay behind huh?” Dean asked “Wait where are you gonna stay?” Dean asked looking desperately at Cas.

“Here, ya idjit” Bobby stated obviously

“Oh Bobby, I couldn’t. I have to stay with Anna, I’ve just made her homeless too…” Castiel said as if it just occurred to him.

“She can stay here too. What’s family for” Bobby asked

“But we’re not-“ Cas said confused and Dean just smirked he’d heard what bobby was going to say many times before

“Family don’t end with blood boy” Bobby said before walking out of the room

“Does he really mean that?” Cas asked Dean intently

“Of course he does, Cas. After everything of course you’re family” Dean kissed Castiel chastely enjoying the buzz of just simply being able to do that “which means Anna is too”

“Does Anna know about any of this?” Dean carefully asked aware he didn’t know

“I… I don’t know. I imagine not, Michael will not have told her and I haven’t spoken to her in… a while. I really need to call her” Cas said standing up

“Here, I’ll leave you to it” Dean cupped Cas’ face “Good luck” He kissed Cas’ cheek and walked out leaving Castiel.

Dean walked downstairs to see Bobby.

“Hey Bobby” Dean said strolling into the kitchen noticing it void of Sam “how did you know that Cas had a deal with Michael?” Dean sat down in front of his forgotten breakfast.

“Your dad called” he answered. Dean had expected it but it still managed to unsettle him.

“And you spoke to him?” Dean chewed out.

“I wasn’t going to listen but he said Michael had called and I thought it would be better to know what the hell is going on rather than have it bite us in the ass after it’s happened” Bobby looked thoughtful for a moment.

“This isn’t going to go smoothly, I know John and I’ve had glimpse of Michael’s character, and let’s just say I know the type. I don’t trust him an inch” he finished

“Me either Bobby but I’m not going to let anyone harm a hair on Cas’ head”

“He’s family, we protect family. Of course we’re not going to let him get hurt. But we gotta be careful. I don’t like the mud we’re being dragged into”

“Let’s just hope we come out clean” Dean said. Thinking over the strange turn of events his life had become since his move here.

“Bobby? Are Sam and me staying here now?” He asked thoughtfully. Bobby shook his head

“Idjit” he muttered, giving Dean a comforting smile. It looked fatherly to Dean, yeah that fit he thought to himself smiling back.


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean made coffee he thought Cas would appreciate it after his phone call with Anna, it can’t be easy.
> 
> “Hey Bobby, you want?” Dean asked wiggling the coffee pot in his direction
> 
> “Sounds good” Bobby said putting down whatever he was holding and joining Dean by the coffee pot.
> 
> “I gotta know what the plan is?” Dean asked as he passed Bobby his coffee

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone so much, I really hope you enjoy this chapter, some more sexy time i hope you all like :D 
> 
> Please feel free to tell me what you think :)

Dean made coffee he thought Cas would appreciate it after his phone call with Anna, it can’t be easy.

“Hey Bobby, you want?” Dean asked wiggling the coffee pot in his direction

“Sounds good” Bobby said putting down whatever he was holding and joining Dean by the coffee pot.

“I gotta know what the plan is?” Dean asked as he passed Bobby his coffee

“What plan?” Bobby replied between sips of coffee.

“The one where John and Michael get together and stick to their deal” Dean answered laced with sarcasm

“I don’t know what’s going to happen, but I doubt it’ll go smoothly. They’re meeting at some warehouse at eleven pm, tonight according to your father” Dean nodded his acknowledgement deep in thought.

“Dean, tell me you ain’t gonna do something stupid now?” Dean looked to Bobby and saw the serious concern on his face.

“No Bobby! Of course not” Dean responded sipping his own coffee

“You’d better not!” Castiel said from the doorway. Dean looked at Castiel judgingly

“Hypocritical, I know…” he said guiltily

“Relax Cas, coffee?” Dean asked already pouring one for him. “How’d it go with Anna?” he inquired passing Castiel his mug. Bobby pointedly exited the room leaving Castiel and Dean alone in the kitchen. Dean waited until Bobby was completely gone and then dragged Castiel over to the kitchen table.

Castiel ran a hand through his hair before letting it rest on his mug.

“She didn’t know anything… Not even that we were in hospital”

“What? Michael never told her?”

“No” Castiel shook his head for emphasis. Dean took one of Cas’ hands in his own

“How did she take it?” he asked giving his hand a gentle squeeze

“I... I didn’t tell her”

“Cas, why not?”

“I didn’t know how best to explain it and over the phone didn’t seem like the right way” Dean hummed his agreement

“Telling her face to face is going to suck”

“Yes it is” Castiel agreed taking a swig from his coffee. “She should be home soon, Michael conveniently paid for her and Balthazar to go on holiday”

“Doesn’t that mean they missed school?”

“Dean… he tried to have me killed…” Castiel gave Dean a look to express how much of an idiot he was.

“Right yeah… prospective” Dean muttered into his coffee. “Oh!” Dean suddenly remembered something that would cheer Castiel up. Castiel looked confused at Dean’s outburst

“Come on, come on Cas!” Dean said pulling at is hand, Castiel stood up and started following Dean “Oh don’t forget your coffee” Dean waited as Castiel stretched his arm back and picked up his mug. Dean led Castiel through to the living room and sat him on the sofa. Joining him Dean picked up the remote and flicked on the television.

“There was a new episode of Doctor Sexy last night, so you have to catch up” Dean pulled the box set out from under the sofa and hurried to put on the next episode Cas needed to watch. Dean returned to his place next to Castiel and wrapped an arm around him. Castiel lent into him and Dean placed a soft kiss to the side of his head.

They were on their fifth Doctor Sexy episode when Castiel turned to look at Dean.

“Dean, what day is it?” he asked. Dean thought about it, huh… what day was it? He’d lost track sometime in hospital.

“You know, I’m not sure. BOBBY?” Dean answered and then shouted startling Castiel slight. It wasn’t Bobby who responded though instead it was Sam.

“What’s with the shouting?” He asked disgruntled

“Sammy, what day is it today?” Sam looked at his brother like he was mad.

“It’s Sunday Dean…” he stated walking away. Dean looked at Castiel who was staring back.

“Does that mean…” Dean started letting the sentence trail off

“School tomorrow” Castiel finished nodding his head before groaning and dropping his head to Dean’s shoulder. Dean groaned too.

“God, how much do you think we’ve missed?” Dean rested his chin on Castiel’s head.

“I don’t know, we were in hospital for a while and urghh” Castiel buried his face even deeper into Dean’s. “I’m pretty sure I have homework due” he added grinding his face into Dean’s shoulder

“Bobby will call the School and explain and you know I don’t think he’ll force us to go, I bet he doesn’t even expect us too” he soothed

“We should though, we’ve got to try and get back to some semblance of normal” Castiel said looking at Dean.

“Yeah,… but school?” Dean groaned again.

“Yes school” Castiel answered determined.

“Well you know what that means then” Dean said. Castiel tilted his head and narrowed his eyes at Dean. Unable to resist Dean pushed forward and kissed Castiel.

“Early night tonight” he rubbed his thumb over the light sheen his kiss had left on Castiel’s lower lip.

“Well that seems- wait, I’ve not forgotten your promise Dean” Castiel said through his pouted lips.

“Sorry baby, school tomorrow… early night” Dean lent forward and kissed Castiel’s pout away before putting his arm back around him and gesturing to the TV

“You’re about to miss a good bit” Castiel huffed slightly but settled in, not wanting to miss Doctor Sexy.

They sat and watched more Doctor Sexy, Bobby brought them both a sandwich sometime in the afternoon.

“Ain’t you boys watched enough TV for one day?” he said in such a parental manner Dean couldn’t help the squeeze of affection in his heart.

“It’s cool Bobby, we’ve got homework to do anyway” Dean said picking up the plate with his sandwich on it and tugging Castiel up with his free hand who also grabbed his sandwich and followed as Dean pulled him up the stairs. They entered their room, Dean couldn’t just call it his now not when Cas had integrated into it so much. It was definitely both of theirs.

“Dean, all my work burned down in my house…” Castiel looked sad at the loss of another thing, even a thing as mundane as homework. He sat forlorn on the bed.

“That’s ok Cas, you can help me with mine” Dean threw a wink for good measure hoping he would cheer Castiel up. Dean pulled out his math book looking at the crinkled paper, brown from where the muddy water had marked it.

“Hey just like the time we first met” Dean said

“Oh yes… you’re not going to throw it at me again are you?” Castiel asked putting his hands up in a surrender position. Dean laughed dropping his math book and taking Castiel’s hands

“It was an accident… I didn’t know you were there” Dean sat down in front of Castiel on the bed.

“I’m glad it happened, we might never have met otherwise” Castiel stated a happy smile on his lips. Dean looked at Castiel’s lips watching his smile broaden.

“I never thought I’d say this but… thank god for math” Dean said kissing Castiel as they laughed against one another’s mouths.

“Speaking of…” Castiel said breaking away from Dean who wined and tried to cover it with a manly cough but still lent forward chasing Castiel’s lips. Castiel leaned even further back and Dean took advantage of the situation suddenly pushing forward and knocking Castiel fully back, straddling him as he went.

“Cas… I don’t wanna do maths” he said grinding his hips.

“Nnng Dean!” Castiel tightened his grip on Dean’s hands and threw his head back.  “But Dean… math” Castiel gasped out. Dean looked down at Cas dumbfounded. He started to laugh

“Cas? You really want me to stop so we can-“ Dean had to stop as he laughed “can do maths?”

“God no-“ Castiel barely finished his sentence before his lips were claiming Dean’s. Dean responded teasing Castiel’s lip, palming at Castiel through his pants feeling him growing hard. Cas hissed his approval.

“I-I-“ Castiel swallowed hard

“What is it Cas, What do you need?”  Dean asked sliding his hand up Cas’ shirt. Dean’s hand slid up Castiel’s snail trail enjoying the slight tickle. Moving further up Dean traced the muscle definition of Cas’ stomach, he knew it pretty well but mapping it out was always enjoyable and Castiel wriggled at the feather light movement. This time Dean didn’t want it to be as hasty he wanted to fully explore every crease of Castiel’s skin learn it until he could find every freckle in the dark.

Dean pushed and pulled at the shirt determined to reveal more of Cas’ skin, he was vaguely aware of stretching the material but was in too much of a rush to have Castiel on display to worry. The shirt finally free Dean lobbed it behind him, his eyes raked over Castiel’s body, he caught sight of the scar Michael had left and Dean stilled.

“Dean?” Castiel asked gently “Dean its ok, we don’t have to” He began sitting up and Dean placed his hand, spread wide, on Cas’ chest gently pushing him back down. Leaning forward Dean kissed the small scar.

Dean kissed his way up Castiel’s body, finding every freckle and mark along the way kissing them adding them to the map in his mind.

“This one is my favourite” Dean muttered into Castiel’s skin kissing it “freckle” he finished nuzzling it with his nose. It was a small freckle just above Cas’ right nipple. Dean felt the tremors as Cas laughed Dean smiled and nipped playfully at Cas’ side, Dean felt Castiel’s hand work its way into his hair tugging at the strands. Dean rose with Castiel’s tugs and looked at Cas.

“So hot, Cas” Dean stated as he moved his hands to undo Cas’ pants.

“Dean, wait I…” Castiel covered Dean’s hands

“You want me to stop?” confusion flooded Dean but he moved his hands away from Cas’ fly

“Yes” Castiel answered surely. Dean tried not to let the hurt he felt show on his face. He climbed off Cas and moved along the bed so they weren’t so close, he rearranged his jeans by his crotch as they were desperately tight.

“No I mean yes I want you to stop that but I don’t want to stop” Castiel looked frustrated at the words tumbling from his mouth, Dean just felt even more confused.

“What I mean is … I want to … try?” he said not looking at Dean.

“You want to ... oh! Well yeah Cas sure” Dean answered crawling back towards Cas. Dean pulled him into a kiss, Castiel pushed Dean down without breaking the kiss. They had now effectively swapped positions as Castiel sat below Dean’s hips.

“Why am I always topless first?” Castiel asked pulling Dean’s top off

“Because” Dean stopped as his top passed over his head “I’m more eager” he finished winking at Castiel who laughed and pushed Dean back down. Castiel sank down and Dean felt his tongue brush over one of his nipples making him moan.  

The strain in his pants was unbearable and Dean started squirming desperate for friction.

“Cas!” Dean said the urgency evident in his voice

“Shhh… “ Dean just groaned in response praying Cas wasn’t going to tease him. Dean could feel hands roaming around his body, they traced down his sides and slipped under his waistband, Dean bucked his hips up hoping Castiel would take the hint and take his pants off. He did. As they slipped off Dean sucked in a breath at the feeling of the material dragging along his dick. Dean moved his hand to touch himself need his release but his hand was slapped away by Castiel making Dean whine.

“Casss” Dean whined again his voice breaking with want. Castiel placed a hesitant hand around Dean’s cock and began sliding it up and down

“Mmmng” Dean mumbled unsure of what he was really trying to say.  Dean felt Castiel run his thumb over his slit collecting the leaking pre-come using it as lube.

“Faster Cas” Dean groaned as Castiel picked up his pace “like that just like that” Castiel started adding twist that were quickly making Dean lose his mind. Dean looked at Cas and saw a look of pure concentration on his face as he stared at his moving hand.

“Cas… I need you to… you gotta” Castiel looked up at Dean questioningly and slightly afraid

“Kiss me” Dean gasped. Castiel’s hand stilled momentarily on Dean’s dick before he pushed forward sloppily kissing Dean and continued to stroke along his erection.  Dean ran his hands over Castiel’s back and grabbed at Cas’ ass pulling him forward.

Dean pushed his hands down Cas’ waistband and pushed his pants down surprising Cas who broke apart from the kiss panting, Dean moaned

“I’m close Cas, so close… together?” he said wrapping his hand around Castiel’s cock finding it already slick from sitting in pre-come damp boxers. Castiel looked at Dean who was biting his lip and trying hard to not close his eyes at the pleasure building inside him.

“Together” Castiel answered shakily. Dean applied his old tricks to bring Castiel as close to the edge as he was. It didn’t take long before Castiel was moaning he was close into Dean’s mouth.

“Deaaan” Castiel growled in a low deep voice that pushed Dean over the edge, he came over his and Cas’ stomach calling his name. Dean nipped at Cas’ lips and kissed along his jaw until he was right by his ear

“Your turn now, come for me Cas” Dean rasped, Castiel dropped his head to rest on Dean’s shoulder and came biting into it. Dean could feel the hot splatter of Castiel’s come on his stomach.

Castiel wiped a finger up his chest collecting Dean’s come before sucking it into his mouth and collapsing on top of Dean. Dean stared at him dumbfounded

“Cas do you know what you do to me” he said, Castiel looked at him with a smirk

“I was curious what you tasted like” he answered

“Oohoho Cas!” Dean moaned, the slick layer between their stomachs was sticky and although he really didn’t want to move Dean realised they hadn’t eaten their lunch and was starting to feel the pangs of hunger.

“Come on, let’s get cleaned up” Dean pushed Castiel off him and grabbed one of their pre used towels and wiped of himself first before struggling to do the same to Cas who just was not being helpful. They ate lunch and realised it was later than they thought. They sat redressed in a blissed out haze eating their sandwich and kissing.

There was a knock on the door and Dean waited inevitably for Sammy to enter.

“Hey what are you guys doing?” Sammy asked picking up the other half of Dean’s sandwich and shoving it his mouth. Dean thought about a quick lie to tell his brother when he spotted the math book lying on the floor

“We’re… doing math homework” he lied looking at Castiel to get him to play along. Dean hoped his brother would find that boring and leave so he could make out with Cas some more.

“Oh great, I need help. I’ll go get my books” Sammy sprinted out of the room and Dean collapsed on the bed disappointed his plan failed. Castiel followed him sliding his hand up Dean’s shirt. He kissed Castiel hastily before Sam returned.

When he did Sam sat cross legged on the floor, his jotter in his lap. He was in the middle of asking Cas’ help on something when Dean felt the need to massage Cas’ scalp. He sat behind him and worked his fingers through his hair scraping along his scalp.

“So what do you think the answer should be?” Sam finished staring intently at his work.

“Seven” Cas answered his head lulling and his eyes shut

“That doesn’t make sense the answer should be an equation” Sam looked up confused at Castiel “Oh you guys are useless!” he scolded storming out of the room. Dean laughed at his little brother and Castiel playfully slapped at Dean but made sure he continued his massage.

The rest of the day passed by uneventfully, they ate dinner, Dean apologised to Sam for not helping him with his homework or ok not being able to keep his hands off his boyfriend for two freaking minutes as Sam had put it. Bobby laughed at them all and told them to help Sam after dinner and they did this time. At about half nine Bobby told them if they were going to school tomorrow they’d all better get their sorry butts to bed and before Dean knew it he was staring down at Castiel sleeping and checked the time on his phone it was 10pm. Gently pulling Castiel’s arms from around his waist and pushed himself from the bed. It was time.

Quietly Dean walked down stairs Bobby was nowhere to be seen but Dean found what he was looking for, Bobby’s phone. He opened the texts and found one from John forwarded from a number Dean assumed to be Michael’s. It gave the address Dean wanted. He made a note of it and shoved it into his pocket, putting Bobby’s cell back Dean quietly sneaked outside and into his car. He didn’t have a plan but he had to be sure, sure Cas would be safe.


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “CAS, DEAN GET UP! WE’VE GOTTA GET READY FOR SCHOOL!”
> 
> Castiel buried his head under the duvet trying hard to block out Sam’s intrusive voice.
> 
> “Maybe we shouldn’t go to school and just stay in bed instead” Castiel reached for Dean

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So many thanks for every kudos, comment and to everyone who's reading this! :D Thank You!
> 
> I really hope you like the chapter :)

“CAS, DEAN GET UP! WE’VE GOTTA GET READY FOR SCHOOL!”

Castiel buried his head under the duvet trying hard to block out Sam’s intrusive voice.

“Maybe we shouldn’t go to school and just stay in bed instead” Castiel reached for Dean, fingers skimming along the cool sheet. When his hands failed to find the smooth skin they searched for Castiel pushed his eyes open and saw the emptiness of the room.

“Dean?” he asked pushing the bathroom door open. Thinking he was already up Castiel shoved clothes on so he was decent and ran down the stairs.

“Dean?” He stumbled into the kitchen and faltered when he saw only Bobby and Sam eating breakfast, sprinting to the front of the house Castiel looked outside and felt his heart drop as his fears were confirmed, the impala was gone. So was Dean.  

Castiel ran back up to the room and searched frantically for a note, an explanation, anything to put his mind at rest that Dean hadn’t done something stupid like go to that damn meet up.

Castiel tore the room apart at first looking for answers but soon just to be destructive. His anger bubbled out of him as he ripped the duvet from the bed and scattered a pile of books to the ground. Spotting his cell Castiel grabbed it up, hope filling his chest only to collapse leaving an empty toxic void as there was nothing. The phone hurdled from Cas’ hand as he tossed it sprinting back down stairs.

“Where was it?” He growled deep and animalistic at Bobby

“He wouldn’t go there, he’s not that much of an idjit” Bobby tried to soothe

“Bobby so help me-“ before Castiel could finish his threat the door banged open and Castiel spun round to see Dean.

Blood covered the plaid over shirt and white undershirt Dean was wearing, there were scratches and new bruises blossoming on Dean’s face, he looked dazed.  Dean sank to his knees and looked down at his hands which were stained red.  Castiel sored forward towards Dean and lifted his shirt but saw no wound to cause the blood drenching it.

“Dean?” Castiel asked tenderly aware that Bobby and Sam were both standing just behind him.

Dean looked at Castiel who vaguely registered the slick feeling of blood as Dean held his face. Castiel covered Dean’s hand with his own nuzzling into it despite the blood.

“Dean?” Castiel tried again, he still hadn’t said anything since he came in, just stared dazed and kept gulping air. There were hints of fear and sadness nestled in next to the flecks of green in Dean’s eyes and it made Castiel nervous.

Castiel moved his hand so it wrapped round the back of Dean’s head, it felt wet and sticky. More blood.

“Dean, what happened? Can you tell us what happened?” He asked trying to coax an answer from him. Dean looked up at Sam and Bobby, staring at them for a while before turning his gaze back to the hand that wasn’t on Cas’ face.

Dean looked Castiel in the eye

“M…Michael … he’s, he’s dead” Dean finally spoke before collapsing forward onto Castiel.

“Dean!? Dean, can you hear me?!” Castiel asked sharply but Dean was unresponsive. Castiel looked at his face tapping it slightly, Dean remained unresponsive, his eyes closed and breathing shallow.

Bobby knelt next to Cas and swept Dean up and deposited him on the sofa a few feet away. Castiel ran to the kitchen and grabbed water and anything else that would be helpful to Dean. Returning to his side Bobby picked at some of the stuff there and began to clean up Dean. Sam ran down the stairs with his arm full of towels and handed them to Bobby along with the first aid kit that was tucked in his armpit.

Castiel’s eyes were fixed on Dean as Bobby wiped away the blood that covered him. The pale material of the towel stained dark. Castiel felt two hands sneak around his waist and he looked down to see Sam hugging into him shuddering as he cried. Castiel wrapped his arms around Dean’s little brother protectively pulling Sam into him as if he could block everything with his arms.

“Is he going to be ok?” Sam asked sniffing his head buried in Castiel’s chest. Castiel looked over at Bobby hard at work.

“He’ll be fine Sam, don’t worry” Castiel said with as much conviction as he could muster. Feeling barely convinced himself.

Castiel was torn, he wanted to take Sam away try eliminate some of the stress for him but that would mean leaving Dean himself and he wasn’t sure he could do that. He could almost hear Dean telling him to look after his brother, making the decision that much harder. Eventually Cas decided they should wait in the kitchen, close enough they could be there in a second but far enough away Sam wouldn’t have to look at his brothers battered unconscious body.

Castiel led Sam through into the kitchen and sat him in one of the seats, he moved over to the kettle filling it up and setting it to boil. He watched as the liquid bubbled, gripping the edge of the worktop Castiel let his head drop, guilt flooding through him. He never should have set up the meeting, he was trying to save Adam not condemn Dean and now Dean was lying injured again covered in blood.

The kettle popped and Castiel flinched slightly, he put a teabag in a mug and filled it with the burning water, he added milk and heaped in multiple teaspoons of sugar before placing the mug in front of Sam.

“I don’t want tea” he sobbed tears still streaming down his face. Castiel gave him a paper towel and just nudged the tea closer to him. He wrapped his hands around it.

 Castiel made himself a mug lost at what else to do. He returned to the table and sat opposite Sam who finally took a sip of his tea.

“I don’t take sugar” he said looking sadly into the mug. Castiel took a sip of his own tea, enjoying the warmth but as the over sweet liquid hit his tongue Castiel swallowed quickly not enjoying the taste.

“Nor do I… it’s supposed to help with shock” Castiel answered waving his hand in an explanatory gesture. Sam’s crying subsided into just sniffing

“Cas, what was he doing? What happened?” he sounded as desperate for answers as Castiel himself were.

“I don’t know Sam… we won’t know until he wakes up” Castiel replied softly, looking deeply into his mug.

“He will won’t he?” Sam asked his voice breaking

“Yes, Sam. Yes of course he will!” Castiel reassured snapping his eyes directly to Sam. Bobby walked through a moment later and sighed sinking into the chair next to Sam.

“How is he?” Castiel asked instantly

“He’ll be ok, he’s still out though. I’m amazed he managed to drive home, it’s a nasty gash he’s got on his head” he answered rubbing a hand down his face.

“Should we take him to the hospital?” Sam asked worry evident in his voice.

“No, I’ve fixed him up he’ll be fine, the more people we get involved the worse this can get” Bobby reasoned.

“What do you mean?” Castiel asked confused

“There was a whole lot of blood on him that ain’t his, we don’t know what happened”

“Wait, you think Dean attacked someone!?”  Castiel balked at the outrageous suggestion and looked at Sam who stared guiltily at his tea.

“No, Dean wouldn’t”

“Cas, we’re not saying he’d just ruthlessly attack someone but we don’t know the situation. As far as we can guess he did go meet Michael and John, who knows what, happened except that Dean got hurt and apparently Michael is dead”

“Cas you know Dean he’d try save anyone no matter their story but he’s so protective of you”

“The point is, worse-case scenario Dean did do something then if we get more people involved Dean could find himself in a whole lot of bother”

“Dean is not a murderer” Castiel practically shouted

“Of course not” Bobby sighed in resignation “We’ve just got to be careful. I’m going to the warehouse to see what state that place is in. Sam you watch your brother while Castiel showers” Bobby started giving orders to keep everyone from falling apart.

“I don’t need to sh-“

“You’ve got blood on your face” Bobby retaliated

Castiel got up without saying a word and walked out of the kitchen. He stopped by the sofa, Dean’s limp body lying on its side, clean of blood but still looking battered and bruised.

“Oh Dean” Castiel whimpered as tears began to sting his eyes, he brushed his hand through Dean’s hair and pressed a kiss to his forehead.

“This has to stop” he muttered into Dean’s head before moving his hand through Dean’s hair brushing it away from his forehead. Castiel moved away from Dean and plodded up the stairs to wash the blood from his face.

Back in the bathroom Castiel looked in the mirror at the smudged bloody handprint on his face and sighed, it streaked where tears flowed through it. Castiel pulled off his shirt and dropped it on the floor, his pants and underwear joining moments later. Slipping into the running shower Castiel scrubbed at his face watching the water run red down the drain.

The shower provided memories of Dean that warmed Castiel in places the hot water could never reach but all too quickly the warmth froze over as Castiel thought back to Dean lying unconscious on the sofa just downstairs from him. Castiel scrubbed harder at his skin attempting to wash away the guilt he felt for Dean’s condition, he scrubbed at his arms and legs, when his limbs turned red Castiel stopped scrubbing and instead began lathering shampoo through his hair, remembering Dean’s fingers massaging through his scalp Castiel tried to imagine it was Dean’s not his own running through his hair but it was no good. Guilt slithered down his body with the suds as again he thought of Dean lying on the sofa, hurt and all because Castiel had to try help.

Castiel collapsed on the shower wall.

“I’m sorry Dean, I’m so sorry” tears streamed down Castiel’s face as sank to the bottom of the shower wrapping his arms around his knees.

When the water ran cold and Castiel couldn’t stand it anymore he mentally pulled himself together and got out of the shower.

Dry and redressed Castiel wandered out into the bedroom and saw the mess left from his rampage earlier. The books were across the floor and half of them landed open at awkward angles that couldn’t be good for the pages. Castiel cringed at the destruction he caused to Dean’s property, especially knowing Dean didn’t have a whole lot he treasured and Castiel just destroyed a few of the things he did because he was angry with himself.

Bending down to sweep them up Castiel was relieved to see there was no permanent damage done he flicked through the copies noting Dean’s preference to horror stories before placing them back in a neat pile on the table. 

Next was the bed, pillows in a mess and the duvet tossed on a pile on the floor. Pulling the duvet up Castiel threw it haphazardly over the bed and straightened out the pillows. Holding Dean’s pillow into his chest Castiel inhaled the scent that had the power to both drive him mad and calm him beyond belief.

“CAS! CAS GET DOWN HERE!” Castiel jumped at Sam’s shout and ran tripping on the corner of the duvet as went. Tumbling down the stairs Castiel ran to Sam.

“He’s waking up!” Sam said excited and apprehensive.

“Dean? Can you hear us?” Castiel asked watching Dean’s eyelids flutter. They opened revealing the green iris’ that pierced Castiel’s soul. Dean sat up and looked down at his hands and visibly paled further. Looking at Castiel and Sam he said

“I killed him”


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I… I tried, there was so much blood and he, he wouldn’t stop and then it went black. But he’s dead he was definitely dead because I couldn’t…” Dean broke off stifling a sob as he did, he hid his face in his hands.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to say sorry for not getting this chapter up last week! I tried, I really did, but I didn't manage to pull it off. But here you are and I hope you all enjoy this installment.
> 
> Further I want to say that I'm not sure how many chapters there are to go but we are definitely in the last few, I'll try to give you a heads up but I'm a little unsure myself. It also depends on if and how many time stamps I do, so if you have any idea's, moments that you need to know about or something you want satisfied please let me know :)
> 
> Thank you so very much!! :D

Dean stared at Castiel trying to work out the expression on his face.

“Dean, what happened? Do you remember?” Castiel asked edging forwards.

“I… I tried, there was so much blood and he, he wouldn’t stop and then it went black. But he’s dead he was definitely dead because I couldn’t…” Dean broke off stifling a sob as he did, he hid his face in his hands. He felt himself being pulled into a firm chest his face now hidden in the crook of Castiel’s neck. He breathed deeply allowing Cas’ smell to comfort him and anchor him to the present.

 

-

 

Dean pulled up at the warehouse about half an hour early. He scoped an inconspicuous place to hide the impala, John would recognise his baby in a heartbeat and even Michael would be suspicious. He walked around the warehouse and found a way in. It was dank and dark and clearly abandoned, the place was covered in trash and empty crates. Dean found a pile of crates that provided a good view of the rest of the warehouse and situated behind them, waiting.

Dean lost track of time but eventually he heard a car arrive and the engine cut out, Dean followed the sound of footsteps until someone was entering the warehouse. Listening as the footsteps got closer, he cursed under his breath for not thinking they might search the warehouse just as Dean had. He held his breath as the footsteps stopped on the opposite side of the crates.

Another car pulled up drawing the first man away to Dean’s relief.

“John! How wonderful it is to see you” Michael welcomed, in an overly friendly voice that had Dean gritting his teeth.

“Let’s skip the small talk shall we, just give me what I came for” John snarled his rebuttal

“Ah, these” there was a rustling of clothes and then a rattling. Dean peeked through a hole in the crates and made out a small container being shaken.

“You really think, I was just going to hand them over” the container was hidden back in Michael’s jacket.

“That my little brother could really blackmail me into giving you them, oh no no no” Dean watched as Michael pulled something else from inside his jacket and heard the unmistakable sound of a gun being cocked. Shit! Dean thought to himself.

“I mean, it’s the principle really…”

“No I didn’t really expect it. Scum like you never respect your deals” Michael laughed at John’s comment and it caused a chill to run down Dean’s spin.

“Scum like me! I like it. But you were the one who failed at killing my little brother and decided to blow up your own son!” Michael laughed again and Dean paled. He shouldn’t have come. He really shouldn’t have come. Cas he reminded himself, He needed to make sure he’s going to be safe.

“So that’s your plan, just kill me? What’s the point?” John asked

“Well like I said, it’s the principle I can’t let my bastard little brother win but then again I have to make sure he thinks he has or he could still ruin things for me” Michael gestured with the gun and Dean watched as his father sized up his opponent. Gun or not, John was not going down without a fight.

John lunged and both him and Michael collapsed to the floor, there was a bustle and John broke away now pointing the gun at Michael.

“How about you give me what I came here for now?” John demanded. There was more rustling and the container was tossed to John who snatched it from the air in one smooth swoop. He lowered the gun as he looked at the little pill bottle but raised it back to Michael as he pocketed it.

“Dad no!” Dean exclaimed jumping up from his hiding spot. The shock on Michael’s face turned to a sneer as he saw Dean.

“Dean? What the hell are you doing?” John asked angrily never taking his eyes off Michael.

“Don’t do this!” he pleaded moving out from behind the crates.

“Sorry kid, it’s the principle” John scoffed squeezing the trigger. Dean lunged forward and collided with Michael bringing them both crashing to the ground.

“Dean!” John scolded. Dean stood up feeling a faint throbbing in his knee. He walked towards John hoping he appeared calm as his heart thump wildly in his chest.

“Dad, don’t do this. Please” Dean was standing close to John, who was again, pointing the gun at a now standing Michael. Dean dived on the hand holding the gun and twisted so his back was to John’s front, his arm wrapped over John’s desperately trying to wrestle the gun from him.

John was more experienced at not being disarmed than Dean was at disarming, he managed to somehow bring the gun back up, Dean clawed at his father’s hand, squeezing.

There was a loud bang and a dull thump and then a crash as Michael hit the ground. In the next second there was blood everywhere and Michael screaming. John dropped the gun and walked away.

“DAD!” Dean called feeling helpless and alone. John stalled for a moment but then strode out of the warehouse without looking back. Dean ran to Michael

“Michael?” he asked

“Get away from me” Michael said through gritted teeth

“You have to let me help!” Dean pushed his hands forward applying pressure on the bullet wound.

“Don’t touch me” Michael groaned pushing away from Dean.

“You’re going to kill yourself because you can’t get over your hate for me!” Dean argued in disbelief.

“I don’t need your help” he continued

“Don’t be an idiot, yes you do!” Dean once again applied pressure to the wound in Michael’s gut. Michael wriggled his hands away and for a moment Dean thought he was finally able to help but then something hard and solid connected with the back of his head. His hand flew to his head, as his vision swam; it came away covered in fresh blood. Dean staggered back slightly and everything dimmed into darkness.

 

-

 

“I came to a few hours later and… he was dead” Dean finished his recollection of the story crying slightly into Cas’ chest.  Hands wrapped around his face and pulled Dean’s head up.

“Dean? Look at me ok?” Castiel soothed, Dean granted his boyfriends wish.

“You are not responsible. You did not kill Michael. Do you understand” Dean looked pitifully at Castiel

“Cas, I couldn’t save him”

“Hey hey hey,  you tried your hardest. You were unconscious, there was nothing else you could have done” Castiel reasoned

Dean just collapsed forward into Castiel and cried until he had no tears left.

“Dean, come on” Hands were pulling Dean up and supporting him as he walked somewhere, too exhausted to pay attention Dean just went with it.

“Let’s get you to bed” a voice that had to be Cas’ said. They stumbled and climbed and fell bouncing slightly. The warmth that was supporting Dean vanished as a cool material covered him. Dean longed for the comfort of the hands that were on him before. He reached out grabbing for it and pulled the warmth down to him, cradling it against him.

“It’s ok Dean, I’m right here” Cas whispered. Dean fell asleep to the soft comfort of Cas’ voice and the warmth and safety of Cas’ body up against his.

Dean woke up to the feeling of fingers brushing through his hair and a hand lazily trailing his stomach and the faint sound of Cas humming. Dean smiled content and nuzzled into Castiel smelling him and sighing happily.

Dean’s stomach fell, as everything came crashing back down on him. Dean buried his face in Castiel surrounding himself with his boyfriend as much as he could. Cas tightened his hold on Dean

“Shh shhh it’s ok, it’s all ok. You’re safe, you’re home” Castiel soothed

“I’m a murderer” Dean cried into Cas’ shoulder, he could feel the blood coating his hands, wet and sticky. He pulled away from Castiel, sacred of tainting him with substance drawn from his brother’s now lifeless body.

“Blood there is so much blood” Dean frantically wiped his hands on the bed sheets, on himself anything to rid himself of the clinging liquid.

“Dean, there is no blood, your hands are clean” Castiel had taken hold of Dean’s face determinedly looking at him. Still Dean scraped at his hands feeling the blood coat him.

“No no Cas, blood everywhere” Dean grabbed Cas’ wrist and watched blood trickle down his arm.

“come with me” Dean was pulled off the bed, he looked at their connected hands watching blood dripped from them both on to the carpet below, he tried to pull his hand free but Castiel prevailed pulling Dean into the bathroom and sitting him down in the shower. The water flowed over him soaking him and Cas who were both still fully clothed.

Castiel sat down next to Dean and took one of his hands and began lathering it in soap. Castiel massaged the soap into each of Dean’s fingers, miraculously the blood vanished as Cas rinsed it in the water stream placing a soft kiss to Dean’s palm. He reached for the other hand but it was already clean.

Dean cupped Cas’ face seeing it properly for the first time since he got back. He leaned into him and placed a soft grateful kiss on Castiel’s lips.

“Thanks Cas” he said pushing the wet hair sitting on Cas’ brow back off his face.

“You’re welcome Dean” Cas said softly rubbing his thumb over Dean’s cheek. A shiver found its way up Dean’s spine, Castiel fiddled with a dial and the water ran warmer, an arm settled around his shoulders and Dean let his head rest on Castiel’s shoulder. They sat there until there was a knock on the door.

“We’d better get dried off” Castiel helped Dean up and turned off the water spray. Dean stripped off his soaking clothes without a second thought noticing Cas pause for a moment with the towel in his hand before moving forward and wrapping it around Dean.

Dean welcomed the soft material but even more so he welcomed the hands that gently rubbed him dry. Castiel worshiped him completely ensuring every inch of him was dry. Dean tried to return the favour but his hands were batted away by Castiel’s. Dean moaned until Castiel gave in and let Dean, towel dry his hair.

They both dressed and walked down to join Sam and Bobby who returned earlier.

“Dean, how are you doing?” Bobby asked sympathetically. Dean cringed feeling undeserving of sympathy in the current situation.

Dean avoided the question and sank into the sofa next to Sam, Castiel perching on the coffee table in front of him.

 “Sam told me, what happened, Dean and I saw Michael. I’ve also spoken to your father” Bobby started only to be interrupted by Sam

“You spoke to dad!” he said angered

“I had to Sam, we’re in a slightly problematic situation kid” Bobby continued

“So what’s the solution” Castiel asked taking one of Dean’s hands in his own

“John. The police are going to look for him. You two boys will never have been involved and none of you know anything, except that John and Michael did not get on”

“So they’re just going to arrest dad?” Dean asked worrying about his father

“Good!” Sammy commented. Dean squeezed Cas’ hand.

“I don’t think they’ll arrest him son no, they won’t be able to find him. He’s going to take Adam and Kate, his mom, and they’re going to run”

“So we’re never going to see dad again” Dean asked a sadness settling in his heart. Castiel moved to sit on the arm of the chair cradling Dean’s head to his chest.

“Good riddance! We don’t need him screwing up our lives” Sam argued

“But we’ll never meet our brother. Will Adam even know about us? We’re family! He should know we exist. Cas risked his life to save him!” Dean spoke as Castiel patted his head soothingly.

“No, he won’t know. You’ll probably never meet him but now you can carry on your lives, finish school and be happy” Bobby looked at Cas as he finished his sentence.

Dean was losing a brother, albeit one he’d never met but a brother none the less in exchange for Cas. His brother got to live and Dean got to keep Cas for as long as Cas wanted him. Dean tried to focus on that, on the happiness but the picture of Michael lying there dead haunted his mind and chilled his bones and pulled him back into darkness.


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “How about I help you? Some last minute revision?” leaning forward Castiel kissed Dean temptingly.
> 
> “Pretty sure that’s not revision but ok” Dean chased Castiel’s lips whining when Castiel moved away.
> 
> “Nope you’ll have to work for it” Castiel moved back, sitting on the bed waiting for Dean to join him. He did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so this is officially the second last chapter but I have put in that there is 31 chapters and that is because so far I have four timestamps planned and so far the first one is set at Christmas so I will most likely wait until nearer then to post it. If you have any requests or anything let me know and i'll see what I can do.
> 
> I hope you like this chapter :)
> 
> Please feel free to talk to me in the comments, I love hearing from you :D
> 
> Enjoy!

As it turns out Dean wasn’t just gaining Cas he was also gaining his increasingly annoying sister. As a friend Anna was great and at school and out of the house that was their relationship but while they were at home she’d settled into the role of annoying sister Dean didn’t ask for. But he totally loved every minute of it. It was like having a normal family for once.

“Hey Sammy, can I talk to you for a minute?” Dean asked walking into Sam’s room noting all the books thrown about the place.

“Sure Dean, what’s up?” Sam closed the book he was currently reading and Dean joined him on the floor

“After Anna got back, things were kind of a whirlpool and suddenly changed our entire family life and I realise we never really asked you, but you’re my brother and there is nothing I would put in front of you and I guess I’m trying to ask how you feel about it all?” Dean rubbed at his neck nervously. Of course he would give it all up for Sam, Cas included if he had to but that didn’t mean it would be easy.

“Dean, stop freaking out. I think this is great, really. It’s like I have two big brothers and a big sister who between the three of you can help me with pretty much anything. I mean sure it’s a little crowded but honestly I kinda really like having a full family”

Dean couldn’t help the wide smile that broke across his face, returned in full by Sammy.

“Can I get back to my homework now? It’s due tomorrow and I want to finish it before I go see Jess tonight” Sam moaned, a light blush covering his cheeks

“Sure thing Sammy” Dean answered ruffling Sam’s shaggy hair and sauntering out the room.

Dean wandered up the stairs to the attic freshly converted into Anna’s room. Dean had to admit Bobby had done an awesome job fixing it up. It didn’t even look like an attic, Dean would be jealous if he didn’t have his room the way he and Cas like it. He knocked on the door and entered the room catching Balthazar and Anna suspiciously close on her bed.

“Hey Balthazar, you mind if I talk to Anna for a bit?” Balthazar climbed off the bed

“Sure, I’ll just go pester Cassie” Balthazar practically skipped out the room

“HEY! DON’T WIND HIM UP- oh…” Dean tried to shout after Balthazar but he knew it would be no good.

“So what’s up bro?” Anna asked scooting forward to the edge of her bed. Dean smirked at her before sitting in front of her cross legged on the floor.

“You like it right? Living at Bobby’s? I know Sam can be a pain in the ass and it can’t be that much fun having me and Cas together all the time but-“

“Dean, I love it here. Bobby made me my own room and it’s pretty amazing in case you hadn’t noticed. Sam really isn’t a bother and ok you and Castiel could dial it down a notch with the lovey dovey stuff but honestly I’ve never seen him so happy” Dean just managed keep his balance as Anna flew off the bed, barrelling into him giving him a hug.

“Honestly, it’s great. Quit worrying and go save your boyfriend from mine- friend! From my friend, Balthazar, from Balthazar” Dean laughed at Anna’s casual cover up receiving a hard shove in response. Dean walked out of the room chuckling, he walked down stairs intent on saving Cas from the teasing Balthazar would likely be antagonising him with when he saw Bobby and made a detour.

“Hey Bobby, how’s it going?” he asked following Bobby into the kitchen

“Well ok if I can ever get this damn paperwork done with all the noise about the house” Bobby grumbled pouring himself and Dean a coffee.

“I can get them to shut up if you need?” Dean asked accepting the coffee

“Nah, don’t do that. Kids ain’t supposed to be grateful, let ‘em have their fun” Bobby finished shuffling his paperwork around on the table with a small smile hidden behind his coffee cup as he sipped the hot liquid.

 “You’re ok with us all here right? We’ve pretty much invaded your home” Dean couldn’t help the guilt that found his way into his tone.

“Course ya idjit, this big empty house was never a home until you all got here. It’s nice. But that is as sappy as we are gettin’. Don’t you got some homework to finish or somethin’?” Dean laughed and placed his coffee down on the table, leaving the kitchen. He walked into the hallway to see Balthazar running past him and up the stairs followed quickly by an angry looking Castiel

“BALTHAZAR GET BACK HERE YOU LITTLE SHI-“

“Woah Cas!” Dean intercept Cas holding him back as Balthazar taunted him from the stairs.

“Oh I’d keep running Balthy, or I’ll let him go” Castiel snarled and clawed towards Balthazar for effect causing him to turn tail and run back to Anna.

“Right you, come on” Dean kept his arms wrapped around Castiel and walked him up to their bedroom, dropping him on their bed.

“You’re happy right?” Dean asked fear prickling the back of his mind.

“Why would you think otherwise?” Castiel asked worry seeping into his voice “Are you?” he asked suddenly.

“What? Yeah of course I am! We were just all hurtled into this living situation and I just want to make sure everyone is ok with it” Dean lay down beside Castiel.

They lay on their shared bed facing each other Castiel cupped Dean’s face and placed a soft kiss on his lips.

“Don’t you have homework to finish? And a math test to study for?” 

“Cas” Dean groaned “must you always ruin the moment reminding me about maths?” Castiel wriggled closer to Dean until they were snuggling.

“I suppose we can wait a bit longer” Castiel whispered sleepily and content. 

“Well I can’t, not now. Now I’m panicking over this stupid test” Dean jumped up from the bed comically spinning Cas off the other end, who fell with a huffy thump. Dean threw papers around the room as Castiel clawed his way back on the bed rubbing his butt where he landed on it.

“Dean, calm down. You’ve studied you’ll be fine” Castiel reassured, he moved over the bed and started picking up the papers thrown everywhere

“Please stop throwing things, I just tidied in here” Castiel sighed. Dean helped Castiel pick up the papers littering the floor

“I’m sorry Cas” Castiel took the papers Dean was holding and put them on the bed, he wrapped his arms around Dean’s neck

“How about I help you? Some last minute revision?” leaning forward Castiel kissed Dean temptingly.

“Pretty sure that’s not revision but ok” Dean chased Castiel’s lips whining when Castiel moved away.

“Nope you’ll have to work for it” Castiel moved back, sitting on the bed waiting for Dean to join him. He did.

“Answer this question right and you get a kiss” Castiel handed Dean a question he’d quickly scribbled down and the pen he used. Dean looked down at the maths question and tried to focus his mind in the math in front of him and not his boyfriend running his tongue over his lips. Forcing himself to look at the paper, Dean jotted down working eventually leading to an answer he prayed was right, turning the page over to Castiel.

“So, Cas? How’d I do?” Dean asked

“Very well, you get your kiss” Dean surged forward held back by Castiel’s hand on his chest. Castiel placed a chaste kiss on Dean’s lips before putting distance between them.

“That’s it?” Dean moaned feeling cheated

“Well, that was an easy one, you’ll have to work harder if you want more” Castiel teased tossing another question at Dean.

“So what does this one earn me?” Dean asked sceptically regarding the question

“Mmm a proper kiss, no tongue” Dean huffed but set to answering the question, it was slightly harder and would take a little longer but dean could get it and he did tossing it back to Castiel smugly, who looked it over and declared it correct.

Dean pounced on Castiel eagerly claiming his reward. He licked at Castiel’s lips trying to gain access and deepen the kiss but Castiel was resilient and pushed Dean away unsatisfied.

“Come on Cas, how about we take a break?” Dean suggested temptingly, running his fingers over his boyfriends arm. Castiel slapped them away.

“You’ll have to work harder than that” Castiel scribbled something else down on the paper and held it out to Dean.

“This one earns you the use of tongue _but_ you have to have all the working right as well” Cas clarified before surrendering the question to Dean.

With the taste of Cas on his lips Dean struggled to concentrate on the numbers on the page. The question was hard. Dean scrunched up his face in concentration and glanced at Castiel who smiled encouragingly. Eventually Dean finished the question and unsurely gave the paper to Cas.

“Mmm sorry baby, that’s not right” Castiel took the pen from Dean and began correcting the work.

“See here, you used the wrong formula. But good effort” Castiel pressed a kiss to Dean’s head “try again” He handed Dean a fresh question. Dean raked his mind and found a formula that should be the right one.  Feeling slightly more confident Dean shoved the paper in Castiel’s direction.

“Very well done” Castiel purred pulling Dean in for his well-deserved kiss. Dean lapped up the attention and moaned into Castiel’s mouth as their tongues slid together. Dean ran his hands over Castiel’s body slipping them under his shirt, his fingertips just brushed skin before Cas pulled out of reach halting the kiss.

“If you want to get my shirt off you’ll need to answer this question” again Castiel scribbled down another question and then glanced at Dean knowingly before writing a lot more.

“Here you go” Castiel said handing Dean the paper “every answer you get right, I will lose a piece of clothing” Dean choked a little causing Castiel to smirk.

“What about the ones under the line?” Dean gestured to the paper and Castiel replied by winking.

Intrigued Dean began working at the first question. He finished it off smugly and passed the sheet to Cas who looked it over. It must have been right because Cas pulled his shirt off revealing his toned torso. Dean dragged his hand down Castiel’s chest brushing the happy trail that disappeared below his pants. Castiel passed the paper back to Dean.

Finishing the second question hastily and shoving it into Cas’ hand. There was faint tut-ting and Dean, saw Cas shake his head.

“You were in too much of a hurry, forgot to add here” Castiel pointed to the mistake “since the working is all correct though, I’ll remove something” Dean looked back at his work disappointed and huffed when Castiel only removed his socks. He snatched the worksheet back and worked on the third one, double checking this time before handing his answer to Cas. Looking it over Castiel clicked approvingly, he handed Dean the sheet and unbuttoned his pants, slipping them off. Dean rubbed over the hairs covering Cas’ thigh. The last item of clothing left was Cas’ boxers and Dean need them off right now.

He furiously did the work and triple checked it determined to get Cas’ underwear off and ignoring him just lying there waiting. Dean threw the paper at him scared to watch. A cough knocked him from his thoughts.

“Would you like to do the honours?” Cas asked wriggling his hips. A smile tore across Dean’s face as he hooked his fingers in Cas’ underwear and pulled them down revealing his half hard penis. Pulling the boxers clear Dean tried desperately to touch Cas stopped by the man himself who wrapped his hand around his own erection and groaning shoved the worksheet back at Dean.

“Mmm better hurry up if you want to join in, just five questions left” Castiel gasped out much to Dean’s annoyance.

Dean looked down at the sheet, his jeans uncomfortably tight and an unwelcome distraction. He shifted his position in a desperate attempt to alleviate the pressure on his groin but the movement caused the material to rub across instead pulling a moan from Dean’s lips.

The noise spurred Castiel on and now the slick noise of Cas’ pre-come was added to the sensations causing a prickling heat under his collar. Focusing Dean stared at the paper scrabbling for answers and managing to get some down for the first couple of questions by the third Dean’s mind was a haze.

“You… you better answer them all Dean” Castiel gasped “I’ll be checking”

Cas’ voice sent shivers down Dean’s spine and he finally answered the third question. He was desperate now scribbling working and cheered ecstatically when he finally got the answer. But his heart sank as he realised there was still one more question left. Castiel’s moans had become almost pornographic and Dean just threw the first number he thought of down for the last question. Tossing the paper away Dean ripped off his shirt and threw himself on top of Cas.

He claimed Castiel’s lips hungrily, desperate for his touches, pent up after all of Cas’ teasing.

“Pants lose ‘em now” Cas growled hand’s flying to Dean’s pants ferociously tugging them down. Dean aided Castiel kicking his pants off. As soon as he was free Castiel had his hands everywhere. Castiel bucked his hips up, rubbing pleasurably against Dean. He already felt so maddeningly close and chased the friction grinding down on Castiel. Cas wrapped his arms around Dean’s neck and spun them.

Straddling Dean, Castiel worshipped his neck sucking a purple mark onto the lightly freckled skin. Leaving a trail of kisses Castiel worked his way down Dean’s body caressing him softly with his hands. He placed both his hands on Dean’s hips holding him in place as he wrapped his lips around the head of Dean’s dick licking at the slit.

The pressure of Cas’ tongue shocked Dean’s mind as the pleasure built, grasping at the sheets Dean called Castiel’s name encouraging him. Castiel took the encouragement impressively and unable to withstand the build Dean reached his climax embarrassingly early, tearing the bead sheets and biting back a scream. Castiel sucked him dry.

Pulling Cas’ face up Dean kissed his lips before holding his face staring deeply into his eyes. Kissing him once more before returning the favour Dean had Castiel writhing beneath him, falling apart calling his name. They lay together trying to catch their breaths, small kisses and whispered words of love shared between them.

A peaceful moment of serenity… naturally interrupted by their inconsiderate siblings.

“Hey guys… woah” Anna cried covering her eyes as Dean scrambled to pull the covers over him and Cas somehow only managing to tangle them further together just in time for Sam to walk in.

“Dinners ready, oh did you guys just…? Gross!” he exclaimed hiding behind Anna who was laughing hysterically. Dean managed to pull the cover up enough to hide their faces and their dignity. Blushing embarrassed Dean placed a kiss to Cas’ nose before hiding his face in his neck.

“We’d better get ready for dinner” Cas whispered.

Dean agreed and watched Castiel put clothes on for dinner. Dean knew Sam and Anna would see the hicky Cas left him and make fun of him for it but Dean couldn’t bring himself to really care, he was in one word: happy.


	27. The Happy Ending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Staring down at the worksheet below him Dean read over the questions noticing they were incredibly similar to the ones Cas had him practise with. This stirred a strange emotion within Dean, one totally not appropriate for the class room. Various images of Castiel and the ghost feeling of kisses on his body left Dean uncomfortable and cursing Castiel for making math sexy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is it, technically the end of the story although there will be timestamps that will come to you at a later date. I hope none of you mind the wait and will stick around for them. 
> 
> I honestly can't believe I've made it this far and I don't even know what to say. A lot of it is to do with Kylea for being wonderful throughout encouraging me, nagging me to write and editing my horrible mistakes! Thank you so much!
> 
> But I also couldn't have done it without the kudos and comments and subscriptions spurring me on. You are all amazing for reading my little story, I can't thank you enough for your kindness!!
> 
> If anyone has anything to say about my story I would really appreciate hearing it, from a thirty page essay to one word, any feedback at all would be incredible. This is my first finished story and a learning experience so all comments are welcome:) 
> 
> Sorry for the super long note... I hope you enjoy the ending! :D

Staring down at the worksheet below him Dean read over the questions noticing they were incredibly similar to the ones Cas had him practise with. This stirred a strange emotion within Dean, one totally not appropriate for the class room. Various images of Castiel and the ghost feeling of kisses on his body left Dean uncomfortable and cursing Castiel for making math sexy. 

Kicking his butt into gear, and as slyly as possible, adjusting his pants, Dean began answering the questions, flying through them in fact. Thanks to Cas for the first time ever Dean was the first one to finish his test. He took it up to the teacher who gave Dean a look that could only be translated as: How bad did you screw this up Winchester? Dean just smugly sauntered away and waited for his paper to be marked.

With the time left Dean sat and day dreamed about Castiel, subconsciously his hand slipped under his collar and stroked over the bruise Castiel had left there.

“Mr Winchester” knocked Dean from his day dream and his hand flew away guiltily and Dean walked down to the teacher.

“This is good work Mr Winchester, keep it up” he said handing him the sheet back. Dean looked down and a massive grin spread across his face as he saw the red 100% written neatly at the top. There was even a little smiley face next to it.

“Hey, is it ok if I go? There isn’t a whole load of time left and there really isn’t anything else to do” he asked hoping he could leave early and catch Cas in his free before lunch.

“Yes, I suppose this once” Dean whooped and was given a stern look to quieten him for the rest of the class who still hadn’t finished their test.

Muttering quick apologies Dean ran from the room much to the surprise of many of his class mates. Running down the empty halls Dean sped his way to the cafeteria knowing Cas was planning on studying there.

Spotting his boyfriends dark head of hair, Dean ran towards him dropping the test paper in front of him. Castiel looked momentarily confused before he saw Dean’s name at the top of the paper right next to the 100%. Dean sank in a chair next to him and adored the proud smile Castiel was wearing.

“Dean, you did amazing! Congratulations” Castiel flew into Dean’s lap and Dean kissed at the smile on his face.

“I couldn’t have done it without you” Dean replied wrapping his arms tightly around Cas.

“Yes you could” Cas said determinedly

They sat lazily making out only haltering when wolf-whistles made them both realise the cafeteria was filling up.  Their friends joined them sitting their lunches on the table.

“Oh gross, do you guys have to be such a couple _all_ the time?” Meg asked sitting opposite

“Yes Meg, I believe those are the terms of our relationship” Castiel answered with a smirk looking at Dean. Laughing Dean nodded his agreement and once again kissed Castiel.

The school day passed without much hassle. Dean had been nervous about going public with his relationship at school but everyone seemed fine with it. Obviously there were the odd few who were just shitty anyway but mostly it was ok and all their friends adapted pretty well.

The rest of the school day passed by un-eventfully, it was over rather quickly and before Dean knew it he was walking out of school into the brisk sunny day. He sauntered out the school door with a content smile on his face, walking towards his baby Dean paused taking in the sight.

Leaning against the impala with his nose stuck in a book stood Castiel. Dean looked Cas up and down taking in everything from his feet crossed to lean arms and his hair blowing in the wind. Dean walked forward and took the book from Castiel’s hand.

“Wha- Dean, I haven’t saved my page” Castiel complained grabbing for the book. Dean turned away and folded the corner down before placing the book on the impala’s roof.

“There!” He replied smugly to Castiel who huffed his annoyance, crossing his arms. Dean placed a soft kiss to Cas’ pout feeling it turn to a smile against him. Cas’ arms enveloped Dean pulling him flush against his body as they both leant against the impala. The kiss deepened as the parking lot emptied, it wasn’t a passionate lead up to sex but another tender, soft, caring kiss that Dean found himself craving more and more.

They broke apart as Anna and Sam appeared. The four of them barrelled into the impala and drove home singing along to the classic rock on the radio. Sam and Anna chatted in the back and Dean took Castiel’s hand slowly stroking it with his thumb.

They arrived home at Bobby’s and were gruffly told when dinner would be ready and to finish their homework first. They all traipsed away to their rooms to do their homework.

Dean and Cas settled on their bed both relaxing into each other glad they didn’t have homework for once.

“So you aced that test huh?” Castiel asked playing with Dean’s hand

“Yeah! I had a very good teacher” Dean answered entwining his fingers through Cas’.

“Mmhmm, I do try” Castiel placed a soft kiss to the back of Dean’s hand. Dean ran his free hand through Castiel’s hair giggling as he styled it to stick up in every direction. Castiel decided to get his own back by tickling Dean. He pinned down Dean’s arms with one hand and let loose tickling all down his sides. Dean wiggled his hands free but it was no use Castiel was in full force tickle mode and soon Dean had tears running down his face unable to speak. Gasping for breath Dean wriggled on the bed holding his sides trying desperately and unsuccessfully to protect himself from Cas’ resilient tickling.

“I GIVE UP!” Dean screamed in surrender, glad when Castiel finally stopped tickling him and collapsed laughing next to Dean.

“Maybe we should go help Bobby with dinner” Cas suggested running his fingers through his hair returning it to its natural messy state.

“Hmm I suppose” Dean answered taking Castiel’s hand and pulling him off the bed and leading him down to the kitchen.

Although Bobby’s cooking had improved since Dean and Sam moved in, he still struggled sometimes.

“Hey Bobby, what’s for dinner?” Bobby was hazardously running around the kitchen tending to pots and pans with a pen in his mouth and papers and a phone in one hand.

“Tryin’ out yer burger recipe” he replied sounding frustrated.

“Here Bobby, let us do dinner” Dean supplied leading Bobby away from something looking suspiciously gloopy.

“Yer a blessing kid” Bobby said walking away dialling a number.

Dean set Castiel to work chopping up vegetables as he saved the gloopy mess that turned out to be the meat, Dean added the appropriate spices and saved the meat patting it into patties. He put them on to cook and took the vegetable toppings Cas had chopped setting them on the table.

Dean set the table and checked on the beef patties, finding them ready Dean declared dinner ready and sent Castiel to alert the rest of the family.

They all sat at the table and enjoyed the family dinner they were having, they all took turns talking about their day. Sam blabbed on about Jess and Gabe and all the fun they had at school, including a prank Gabe pulled on one of the other kids who’d been rude to Jess. Bobby had scolded Sam for his part in it but stifled a laugh behind his drink.

Anna explained about how Meg was planning another party which was going to be _the_ social event and everyone had to be there. Except Sam who was too young, she quickly added glancing at Bobby but winking slyly at Sam.

Cas spoke about his day in which nothing really happened but he was incredibly proud of Dean, which led to Dean telling everyone about his test score, to which they were all incredibly proud.

When Bobby was talking about his day he mentioned that he’d been on the phone to his friends Sheriff Mills who managed to pull some strings and make sure it was all perfectly legit for Anna, Cas, Sam and Dean to all stay at Bobby’s. It was reassuring they weren’t all going to be taken away.

Dinner finished, Anna and Sam decided to clear the table as everyone else prepared for family movie night. It was Cas’ turn to pic but since Dean had done so well in his test he decided Dean deserved to choose. Dean ‘aww-ed’ and gave his boyfriend a quick kiss before picking ‘Kelly’s Heroes’ one of his favourite Clint Eastwood films.

They had the film ready and the popcorn, they just waited for Anna and Sam to finish in the kitchen before starting it.

Bobby sat in his armchair and Sam and Anna shared the couch leaving Cas and Dean with the floor. With a bunch of cushions and their duvet Cas and Dean made a little pile and lay comfortably on the floor. Castiel with his head on Dean’s chest and Dean wrapped his arms around him.

Sitting there with Cas in his arms and his family surrounding him, Dean was overcome with a sense of pure joy, he felt peaceful and happy. His family life had never been better or more settled, his school grades had never been higher and he’d never been happier. This sudden realisation left Dean a bit shocked, he hadn’t even noticed Clint come on screen until Cas nudged him. He smiled blindingly at Castiel who smiled back placing a kiss to Dean’s shirt, in the middle of his chest.

A piece of popcorn bounced off the top of Cas’ head and landed on Dean’s stomach.

“Get a room” heckled Sam.

“Knock it off Sammy!” Dean shouted as another small shower of popcorn rained over him and Castiel.

There was a round of chuckles and Dean flipped them off without looking away from the film. A gruff cough had Dean sheepishly lowering his finger and putting his hand back around Castiel.

“Sorry Bobby” Dean muttered feeling Castiel laugh against him.

“Hey!” Dean shook Castiel slightly “you’re supposed to be on my side” Dean moaned pushing Cas away from him. Cas of course just rolled back.

“I’m always on your side” he said snuggling back into Dean. They settled back down to watch more of the film.

About half way through Castiel wriggled out of Dean’s arms and stood up

“Would anyone else like tea?” He asked quietly, everyone’s hand shot up and Cas walked through to the kitchen. He boiled the kettle and dug out the tea pot since everyone was having it. Dean walked up behind him and wrapped his arms around him resting his chin on Cas’ shoulder. Cas cover Dean’s hands with his own.

They stood cuddling enjoying again being wrapped in each other. The kettle popped and Dean handed Castiel a teabag, Cas dropped it in the tea pot and poured hot water over it. Leaving it to brew they returned to their previous hugging stance.

“You’re going to miss Clint and I know how much you like him” Castiel said stroking Dean’s hand.

“Hmm, that’s true. I do like Clint a lot” Dean turned Castiel in his arms “but I love you more”

Castiel’s eyes widened and he opened his mouth to talk but nothing came out so he closed it again swallowing.

“I love you, Cas” Dean said again a smile spreading across him face, one to matched Castiel’s.

“Dean, I love too” Castiel replied hugging him closely, Cas pulled Dean into a kiss that expressed his love in a thousand different ways. A flick of his tongue said it again in another completely different way. Dean tried to express his own love through his kiss and when they finally pulled away, they both felt truly loved and slightly breathless.

They poured the tea and picked up the mugs to carry them through, Dean held three while Castiel carried the other two. Before they left the kitchen Castiel said smiling

“I love you” Dean smiled right back

“I love you too” No words had ever felt more right to say and Dean felt warm and weightless with love and happiness.

The End


	28. A Very Merry Christmas!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel sat watching the soft snow gently fall adding to the white out that covered the yard he looked out on. It had only been a few months since Cas officially moved into to Bobby’s but the window he now looked out on had been claimed as his own. Bobby had even put in a small bookcase next to it for Castiel to keep his books in. It was the most at home Castiel had ever felt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first time stamp is here :D I hope you don't feel like I've kept you waiting too long, apologies if you do! But this is it and it's Christmas time! Enjoy!
> 
> Thank you for sticking with me :)
> 
> Happy Holiday's and a very Happy New Year to you all :D

Castiel sat watching the soft snow gently fall adding to the white out that covered the yard he looked out on. It had only been a few months since Cas officially moved into to Bobby’s but the window he now looked out on had been claimed as his own. Bobby had even put in a small bookcase next to it for Castiel to keep his books in. It was the most at home Castiel had ever felt.

Staring out the window lost in contentment Castiel didn’t hear Dean sneak up on his until a hat was roughly shoved on his head.

“Come on Cas! We’re building a snowman” Dean called running away. Castiel laughed and ran after Dean finding him wrapping up in multiple layers, sitting on the bed; he wrapped a scarf around his neck and pulled on a hat. Castiel sashayed across to Dean straddling his waist.

Dean looked at Castiel with a mix of expressions, confusion, expectance but mostly humour with a hint of anticipation. Castiel stared back contented in feeling the solid form of Dean between his thighs until a wicked thought crossed his mind. Castiel intensely stared at Dean before pulling his scarf away to reveal his neck.

Leaning forward Castiel placed a soft kiss on the vulnerable skin, his breath ghost across the skin creating a trail of goose bumps and causing Dean to shiver.

“Cas…” Dean whispered

“Shh” Cas hushed him holding his head and directing it to give himself more room as he set to work. Castiel nibbled at the flesh. Mouthing at the skin Castiel was spurred on by a hand twisting in his hair pulling lightly at the follicles. Castiel moaned into Dean’s skin before sucking the flesh into his mouth and nipping at it. Kissing at Dean’s neck Castiel lent back and admired the purple mark he’d imprinted onto the skin there.

Dean had a glazed look in his eyes and his mouth hung open slightly, Castiel kissed Dean’s cheek as he let his fingers run over the bruise on Dean’s neck. Getting off Dean’s lap Castiel heard a small whine as he began putting on his winter outdoors clothing.

Fully wrapped up Castiel took Dean’s hand and together they walked outside. As soon as they were out the door, Castiel was hit smack bang in the centre of his face by an icy snowball.

As he wiped the watery snow from his face he heard Dean laughing uncontrollably. Castiel shook his head and Dean tried to stifle his laughter. He cupped Castiel’s face and kissed him on the nose

“Don’t worry baby, I’LL AVENGE YOU!” Dean shouted running after Sam scooping a giant ball of snow into his arms.

From a distance Castiel could hear shouts of

“DEAN, NO PLEASE! I’M SORRY” A few moments later Dean returned with a very wet and snowy yet giggling Sam. Castiel ran over to him and pecked a kiss on his lips.

“My hero” he stated

“shutup” dean mumbled cheeks heating “let’s build a snowman”

They all agreed and together began building the best snowman. Sam and Dean piled up the body as Cas began rolling the head. Once they were attached Sam suggested they dress it up.

“Hey Dean give me your scarf” Dean moved his hand to his neck to take off his scarf before freezing

“Err no Sammy” Dean said pulling his scarf tighter around his neck. Castiel giggled thinking of the purple bruise on Dean’s neck. But he took his own scarf off regardless and gave it to Sam to wrap around the snowman.

“Thanks Cas” Sam said beaming a smile

“Yeah thanks Cas” Dean mumbled grumpily. Castiel snaked an arm around Dean’s waist

“You weren’t complaining earlier” Castiel whispered

“Oh I’m going to get you back for that” Dean promised with a smirk.

“GUYS! GREAT SNOWMAN! COME GET SOME LUNCH” Anna shouted suddenly from the doorway. Castiel waved over at her before leading Dean inside.

They gathered in the living room as Anna brought out bowls of soup for them all. It was delicious, leek and potato, quickly becoming Castiel’s favourite. Castiel was slowly warming from the hot bowl of soup and his boyfriend’s steady heat plastered next to him.

Bobby flicked on the TV and an appallingly cheesy Christmas film came on, Castiel was ecstatic. Tomorrow was Christmas and he’d be spending it with Dean and their family.

Castiel finished his soup and snuggled into Dean as the film played out. It was near its end and they’d just reached the part of the main character having a Christmas miracle and realising they can be with the love interest and they dramatically come together. Cas smiled at the affection shown and looked up at Dean who appeared a little misty eyed. He looked down at Cas and tried rapidly to blink away the tears in his eyes. Castiel snuggled impossibly closer to his adorable boyfriend and kissed him to through the plaid shirt he was wearing.

Once the film was finished Castiel tugged at Dean’s shirt and gestured for them to go upstairs. They excused themselves and walked up to their shared room.

Dean flopped on to the bed

“So why’d you wanna leave? You know there is probably another Christmas film coming on and… erm… I think… Anna wanted us to be together to watch them…” Dean said

Castiel loved Dean’s secret love of super cheesy Christmas films but Cas had something he had to do first.

“Open this” Castiel handed Dean the pretty wrapped box he’d pulled out while Dean was talking.

Dean sceptically took the box and opened it, he pulled out a pair of satin pink panties.

“Wow Cas, inappropriate gift to give to your sister” Dean stated holding the panties up, feeling them between his fingers.

“They’re not for Anna, Dean!” Castiel blushed slightly, still hoping this was a good idea

“You got a secret girlfriend I should know about?” Dean asked raising an eyebrow at Cas.

“They’re for you” Castiel said shyly. Dean looked over the material surprised

“For me? As in for me to wear or for me as in for you to wear?” Dean asked still rubbing the material between his fingers 

“Which ever you would prefer” Castiel answered sliding onto the bed beside Dean.

“Well, I’m glad you didn’t give me it tomorrow in front of everyone” Dean stated to which Castiel just laughed

“I was going to give it to you tomorrow evening but I just wanted to give it to you now” Dean placed the lingerie back in its box and slipped it under the bed. He pulled Cas into him and spooned him as they both watched the snow fall.

“I’m really glad you’re here” Dean whispered into Cas’ hair. Wiggling a little Castiel turned so he faced Dean

“I’m really glad I’m with you” Castiel replied. Dean pressed a soft kiss onto Castiel’s head who responded by snuggling in closer.

“You know what I want?” Castiel asked a few moments later, Dean laughed

“Does it involve pink satin?” he asked causing Castiel to blush ever so slightly

“No, maybe later but right now… I want a hot chocolate”

“Ohhhh but that means I have to move” Dean moaned

“You’d have to move if pink satin were involved” Castiel argued

“But one is enjoyable, the other is boring” Castiel sat up and thoughtfully looked at Dean

“But which is which I wonder?” Dean soared up

“Oh you know… wait what are you saying?” Dean self-consciously crawled towards Dean

“Relax… of course I know” Castiel gave Dean a kiss to settle him “ Buuuut I still want hot chocolate”

“Oh fine!” Dean gave up and scooted off the bed, grabbing Castiel’s hand and pulling him too

“I’d make it but I like it your way and you won’t tell me the secret ingredient”

“That’s because, it’s a secret” Dean countered

“Well then, you’ll just have to keep making it for me” Castiel kissed Dean’s shoulder.

Dean huffed but still held Castiel’s hand. Secretly Dean loved that he was the only one who knew the recipe that Castiel loved.

They walked into the living room and saw Jess had arrived to join in on the Christmas Eve festivities.  Dean’s face lit up as a Christmas film began to play and Castiel grabbed a blanket throwing it over Dean and himself snuggling in to enjoy another movie.

All too quickly the night had arrived and Dean and Castiel were getting ready for bed. Dressed in their Christmas pyjamas and their teeth brushed they lay together in bed gently trying to fall asleep.

Castiel however couldn’t, he was too excited. Bubbles of anticipation popped in his stomach causing him to toss and turn in bed.

“Cas, you gotta sleep or Santa won’t come” Dean murmured with his back to Cas

“I’m trying but I can’t, I’m too excited” Castiel wriggled against Dean until he turned around and wrapped him in his arms.

“You’ll get your presents, don’t worry” Dean pecked a kiss on the top of Castiel’s head

“It’s not the presents, Dean” Castiel nudged Dean “It’s my first Christmas as part of a proper family”

“Oh right” Dean looked properly down at Cas and smiled at him “I hope it’s everything you dream of, you deserve it“ Dean kissed Castiel with all the love he had as it suddenly overwhelmed him.

Castiel, felt Dean fall asleep and in the comfort of his arms managed to join him.

Castiel was jostled awake by Dean

“Dean!” Castiel moaned in a deep sleepy voice grasping at the threads of sleep.

“But Cas! It’s Christmas!” Dean moaned rolling on top of Cas.

Castiel’s eyes flew open with excitement “Merry Christmas Dean!”

“Merry Christmas, Cas!” Dean dropped to within kissing range of Cas. They kissed slow and lazy enjoying the Christmas morning, well until they heard Sam and Anna running around the hall shouting

“IT’S CHRISTMAS, IT’S CHRISTMAS!” Castiel and Dean laughed in response.

“What time is it?” Castiel asked

“It’s just after six am” Dean answered looking at the clock. Castiel groaned

“It’s so early!”

“Come on, let’s get you some coffee” Dean answered pulling Cas up.

They crawled out of bed, wrapping themselves in their dressing gowns to defend against the contrasting cold, they slowly walking down stairs to where they saw a half asleep Bobby downing what was apparently not his first cup of coffee.

Dean picked up Bobby’s now empty mug and led Castiel to the kitchen, they made more coffee and poured it into cups before joining a bouncing Sam in front of the tree to open their presents.

“Dean, Cas, these are yours” Sam ran over with his arms overflowing with gift in two different wrapping papers. He tried to carefully put them down in front of them but a few of them dropped unceremoniously to the floor. Sam gave an apologetic grin before running back to his pile.

Castiel looked down at his presents from ‘Santa’ and was astonished to see so many. He hadn’t expected Bobby to go to this much trouble, not for him.

Dean picked one of his up and shook it next to his ear to guess what it was. He unwrapped it and found a few DVD’s he seemed very excited about, too excited for Cas to see what they actually were. Following Dean’s approach Castiel picked up one of his presents and shook it. It didn’t rattle. It felt firm and Castiel pulled off the wrapping paper seeing the book inside it. It was part of the series he wanted. A grin spread around his face as he picked up another and another unwrapping them to reveal the entire series. Ecstatic Castiel ran to his bookshelf and lovingly place them on it before running to Bobby and throwing his arms around him.

Bobby seemed slightly taken aback by the sudden affection but eventually hugged back.

“Thank you so much” Cas whispered to him before returning to Dean’s side. They finished unwrapping presents and began getting Christmas dinner ready. Bobby informed them Ellen and Jo would be joining them, both Sam and Dean made kissy noises before they both burst out laughing. Anna and Cas both looked confused before Dean told them that Bobby fancied the pants off Ellen.

Pulling Cas aside Dean told him he had an idea. Of course Castiel went along with it, that’s how he wound up nailing mistletoe on the door frame. As he climbed down from Dean’s shoulders Castiel landed across from him, between them lay the mistletoe.

“I believe you are aware of the tradition” Castiel stated smirking slightly

“I am indeed” Dean responded before pulling Castiel into a kiss that left him slightly breathless. When they broke apart Castiel moved to close the door and spotted Ellen and Jo making their way towards the entrance. Castiel quickly grabbed the door shutting it before they could see and grabbed Dean running to Sam and Anna telling them not to answer the door.

There was a knock and Bobby shouted

“Get the door” To which no-one replied as they hid hoping their plan would work. Bobby grumbled but went to the door none the less.

He opened it and it brushed against the mistletoe, causing Bobby to notice it. Jo ran past him and Sam grabbed her holding him in place, she hadn’t noticed it yet. Ellen looked up at the mistletoe, same as Bobby before she leaned in and kissed him before walking straight into the kitchen. Bobby adjusted the cap he insisted in wearing and muttered

“Bunch of idjits!” before closing the door and joining Ellen in the kitchen, a slight blush on his cheeks.

Castiel sat and enjoyed the happy family atmosphere of Christmas for the first time. They finished dinner and exchanged more presents and watched more crappy holiday TV.

That night in bed Castiel felt the most contented he ever had, his stomach was full and he felt loved. He lay in the arms of the man he loved and was surrounded by a loving family in a loving home. It was the best Christmas he’d ever had.


	29. A 3 step guide to a romantic Valentine's

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Step 1: Romantic breakfast in bed  
> Step 2: Romantic Movie  
> Step 3: Sexy Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm a little bit late but here is the Valentines Day timestamp. I think I'm just going to do one more and then say goodbye to this fic, it's time to let it go. I don't know when the next one will be up but hopefully not too long.
> 
> Enjoy :)

Dean dressed for the day, nothing incredibly special but perhaps a bit nicer. It was their first Valentine’s Day together and Dean was a little nervous. He’d put on the pink satin panties that Cas bought him for Christmas and his snuggest jeans along with that nice shirt that brings out his eyes. He looked back at the mess of black hair half hidden under the covers and Dean felt his heart swell. Sneaking out of the room as quietly as possible Dean walked down stairs and started with his plan.

Step 1: Romantic breakfast in bed

Dean began making the pancake batter and set the kettle to boil for coffee. Dean cooked the pancakes and topped them with maple syrup and strawberries just like Cas liked them, prepared the coffee and put it all on a tray to carry to his sleeping boyfriend. Plodding through to the living room Dean grabbed Castiel’s carefully wrapped present and added it to the tray before climbing up the stairs.

About half way up Dean heard the tell-tale squeak of floor boards. He walked the rest of the way and saw a figure standing at the top.

“Damn it!” Dean muttered under his breath

“You are such a sap” Sam replied laughing like an annoying little brother.

“Shut up Sammy! You wish you were as romantic as me!” Dean barged passed his little brother and into his room. He was greeted by Castiel adorably rubbing his eyes and yawning.

“Dean?” He asked sleepily

“Mornin’ sleepy head” Dean replied putting the tray down in front of Cas.

“Mmmm what’s this?

“Happy Valentine’s Day” Dean said shyly

“Happy Valentine’s Day, Dean” Castiel answered sliding along the bed to give Dean a kiss. Castiel picked up a strawberry from the plate and popped it in his mouth leaving a little trail of maple syrup on his chin just out of reach from his tongue. Dean watched as it darted out of Cas’ mouth to try none the less.

“Let me” Dean said. Castiel paused tongue still sticking our causing a small laugh to vibrate through Dean who leaned forward and kissed the maple syrup from Cas’ chin.

“Hmm” Castiel picked up a strawberry and dipped it in the maple syrup before offering it to Dean. Instead of letting Dean take it Cas traced the shape of Dean’s lips, coating them with syrup. Castiel pulled the strawberry away and licked and kissed the syrup from Dean’s mouth.

Breathlessly Dean said

“If we eat everything like that it’ll take a while” Castiel laughed as he pushed the strawberry into Dean’s mouth. He began tucking in.

Once breakfast was finished Dean picked up the wrapped parcel and nudged it towards Cas who took it and looked lovingly at Dean.

“I know I’m a sap!” Dean said embarrassed

“Only as big as me” Castiel replied leaning of the bed and pulling a small rectangle box from under the bed.

“This is for you” Castiel replied handing Dean the present “I hope you like it”

Together they opened their presents.

“Dean it’s wonderful, thank you!” Castiel exclaimed excitedly looking over the encyclopaedia of bees.

“I saw you watching that documentary like three times, I guessed you liked bees”

“I do, I do! Very much so” Castiel squealed. Dean loved to see the dopey grin that covered his face.

Dean looked down at the present he had opened, an exact replica of his car, it even had the original plates.

“Cas, how did you know about the plates?”

“I had some help, Bobby and Sam both agreed to help me”

Dean moved the tray of now empty mugs and plates onto the floor and crawled into Cas’ lap

“It’s perfect, thank you”  

They snuggled until they eventually thought they should move it was after lunch time after all.

Dean and Castiel sauntered down stairs and were met with an interesting sight.

“Bobby? Where’s your hat?” Dean asked as he reached the bottom stair.

“So I’m not wearing it for one day, sue me” Bobby snarked

“And, do I smell cologne? Do you have a date?” Dean teased laughing at the flustered state of Bobby

“It’s not a date, Jo’s out so Ellen said she’d cook me dinner is all. Ain’t nothing wrong with making an effort!... Shut up, idjits” Bobby started shoving things hastily in his pockets.

“Hey, Bobby I think it’s great, say hi to Ellen for me” Dean smiled it was nice seeing everyone loved up on Valentine’s Day.

“Yeah yeah, well I won’t be back till late, Sam’s out with Jess and then he’s staying at Gabriel’s and Anna’s out until tomorrow” Bobby waved and walked out the door.

Step 2: Romantic Movie

Castiel put popcorn into the microwave and Dean set up the film. They joined together again on the couch and snuggled tucking into the popcorn as the film started.

“Oh Pride and Prejudice! This one of my favourite books” Castiel cooed into Dean’s shoulder

“I know” Dean replied tightening his hold on Cas.

“You know Cas, this Mr. Darcy fellow reminds me of you, you’re not a dick like him but you’re like him socially awkward and broodingly attractive” Dean commented midway through the film.

“You’re also a lot like Elizabeth stubborn, outspoken but incredibly loyal and kind” Castiel replied

“Yeah? I’ll take that as a compliment” Dean pulled Castiel into his lap and kissed him tasting the grains of salt left over from the popcorn. The innocent kiss turned more passionate as they were flush together. Castiel shifted straddling Dean and holding both of his hands.

Dean lent up to kiss Castiel, capturing his lips and claiming them as his own.

Step 3: Sexy Time

“Cas…?” Dean started shyly

“Yes Dean?” Castiel encouraged

“I want to have sex” He blurted out

“Well, yes ok” Castiel replied unsure of why his boyfriend was stating this.

“No, I mean I want us to have sex-sex “ Dean continued starting to blush

“I am confused, we’ve had sex Dean” Castiel relaxed his passion putting a little space between him and Dean who rolled his eyes.

“Cas I want to have penetrative sex” Dean just plainly stated

“Oh I see ok, so have you thought about who would be penetrator and who is penetratee?”

“Oh well I thought you could… penetrate … me” Dean slumped his head into Castiel’s chest embarrassed by the whole conversation

Castiel kissed the top of Dean’s head.

“Come on” Cas stood up and pulled Dean with him leading him back to their bedroom.

Upon reaching the bedroom Castiel gently sat Dean down, kneeling in front of him. Castiel kissed Dean and ran his hands under Dean’s shirt caressing the soft skin of his waist. Teasingly Castiel dragged his fingers out from Dean’s shirt and grabbed it at the collar. He pulled Dean forward into a crushing kiss that spurred Dean into action, he entwined his fingers in Castiel’s hair pulling ever so slightly at the roots.

Castiel fumbled to the first button on Dean’s shirt and undid it moving along to the next in his haste Castiel was sure the second button ripped off but was too preoccupied by the feel of Dean’s tongue sliding against his. The other buttons followed and Castiel was pushing the shirt off Dean’s broad shoulders.

Gently Castiel encouraged Dean to lie down. Following Dean down Castiel straddled his waist kissing Dean feverishly, he spread his affections to Dean’s neck sucking to create a small purple mark. Satisfied with his creation Castiel continued down Dean’s bare chest pausing at each nipple to suck them into his mouth drawing from Dean, sounds sinful enough to make Satan blush. The noises reverberated through Castiel who moaned his response to Dean’s skin. Castiel ground his hips into Dean desperate to relieve some of the pressure of his aching cock.

“Pants! Lose ‘em!” Dean gritted out. Castiel continued kissing down Dean’s stomach as he undid the button on Dean’s jeans. Standing up, Castiel undid his own pants sliding them down slowly as Dean watched nervously licking his lips.

Castiel pulled his t-shirt over his head and tossed it across the room. When he looked back Dean his jeans were gone and he was palming himself through the pink satin panties Castiel bought him for Christmas a sight that made Castiel groan and his cock throb and start to leak. Dean’s eyes fluttered shut and he threw his head back moaning.

Castiel pulled Dean’s hand away making the other boy whimper at the lost friction.

“Not just yet baby” Castiel soothed taking Dean’s panties and sliding them off wickedly slow allowing the fabric to slide over Dean’s sensitive cock.

“Caaaas” Dean begged. Castiel leant over Dean and kissed him passionately. He broke the kiss and left to open the drawer and pulled out a condom and a bottle of lube. Placing them both on the bed Castiel climbed between Dean’s legs and leant up and kissed him again.

“You’re sure you want to do this?” Castiel asked taking hold of both of Dean’s hands and entwining their fingers.  Dean squeezed Castiel’s hands and pulled him down for another kiss.

“Completely” Dean answered staring directly at Cas. “I want you in every way” he added before Castiel kissed him once again.

Castiel sat up, no longer leaning over Dean and let go of his hands.

“On your hands and knees then” Castiel told Dean rubbing his hands over Dean’s thighs.

“But… I want to see you” Dean whined unsure

“You will, we just have to get you ready first” Castiel replied encouraging Dean to rearrange himself. After he had Castiel trailed his fingertips down Dean’s back causing him to shiver at the sensitive touch. Castiel rubbed his hands over Dean’s hips and over his ass cheeks caressing the skin.  Leaning forward Castiel licked at Dean’s hole causing a surprised gasp to escape his mouth which soon turned to moans of pleasure.

Castiel kissed Dean’s thigh as he got the lube and squeezed some onto Dean’s hole.

“Ah, that’s cold Cas!” Dean complained. Castiel snorted a laugh before rubbing his hands down Dean’s back.

“I do apologise” he said as he kissed the middle of Dean’s back. Dean twisted his head round to look at Castiel with such desire Castiel had to kiss him, now. He lunged forward claiming his mouth and licking inside it. As he did this Castiel trailed a finger over Dean’s ass until he found the little puckered hole and gently edged a finger inside.

Dean gasped at the intrusion and Castiel stilled

“Dean?”

“I’m ok Cas, it’s just new” Dean replied “Carry on”

Dean kissed Castiel again as he pushed his finger further in until he couldn’t anymore. Slowly Castiel began to move his finger in and out drawing moans from Dean.

“C-Cas … more … I need more” Dean gasped out so Castiel added another finger savouring the noises Dean made. Castiel experimented with curling his fingers and explored the inside of Dean to find out what really made him tick.

“Cas” Dean panted “I-I’m ready … for yo-ou”

“Are you sure Dean?” Cas asked nervous himself.

“Fuck, yes!” Dean growled

“As long as you’re okay with this?” Dean asked tenderly, now sitting on the bed holding Cas’ face.

“I’ve never done this, but I want to. With you” Castiel reassured

“Together?” Dean asked

“Together!” Castiel replied kissing Dean fiercely. Castiel moved to sit in-between Dean’s thighs again. He took off his boxers and gave his painfully neglected penis a few strokes to ease some of the pressure. Sliding on the condom, Castiel squeezed on the lube stroking it along his length.

“Ahh Dean!” Castiel moaned before his words were cut off by lips. Castiel was taken by a desire to touch Dean, anywhere just so long as he could feel him. Castiel grabbed at Dean’s back not caring he was covering him in lube.

Castiel dragged his nails along Dean’s back and grasped at his hair as Dean moved to kiss Castiel’s neck and chest. Slowly Dean sank down on to the bed pulling Castiel on top of him. Castiel again kissed his way down Dean’s body as Dean wrapped his legs around Cas’ waist rubbing against his erection.

“Deeean” Castiel hissed lining himself up with Dean’s hole and gently pressing in the head of his cock. The sensation caused both of them to gasp in unison.

“Cas” Dean moaned as encouragement. Castiel stroked his hands up and down Dean’s thighs and pushed further in. Fully in Castiel stilled and gave Dean a moment to adjust.

“God Dean, you feel so perfect! Look so perfect” Castiel praised. Dean held his hand out to Cas who took it without thought and pinned it above Dean’s head as he leant down to kiss his boyfriend.

Castiel swallowed the moans Dean fed him and slowly Castiel began to move his hips. He started slow and hesitant but his movement caused Dean’s body to sing as he arched his back and groaned.

“CAAAAAAAAAS” Dean screamed as Castiel found his prostrate. Spurred on Castiel became more confident in his thrusts and kissed Dean as he moved. When they weren’t kissing Dean and Castiel stared at each other enjoying the intimacy of the moment.

“Fuck DEAN!” Cas moaned mouthing at Dean’s shoulder. They both moaned in ecstasy. Loudly. The bed groaned and scraped across the floor with every thrust and the headboard banged against the wall. Castiel was glad they had no neighbours or there would definitely be complaints from the noise and profanity coming from both boys.

Castiel used his spare hand to trail over Dean’s body, he squeezed the hard nub of Dean’s nipple causing more sensations to run through him and more screams to be pulled from his lips.

Castiel increased his pace beginning to feel the sensual build in his naval.

“I’m getting close” Castiel gritted out between heavy breaths. Trailing his hand down from Dean’s nipple, Castiel started to stroke Dean’s cock, pumping it in time with his thrust.

“Fuck! CAS!” Dean screamed at the addition of the hand job.

“I’M GONNA COME! I- I- I- I’M COMING!” Dean screamed “FUCK CAAAAAS!” Dean continued as his load splattered over his own and Castiel’s chest. Dean clenched down on Castiel.

“ARGH DEEAAN!” Castiel screamed as he came and collapsed on top of Dean, not caring about the drying come between them.

Lazily they kissed and just touched felt each other, trailing hands everywhere.

“We have to do that again!” Dean said

“Agreed, but first… coffee” Castiel jumped out of the bed and picked up Dean’s shower towel from last night and wiped away the mess on his stomach before throwing it at Dean. Castiel put his boxers on and pulled on Dean’s shirt not bothering to button it up.

“Sex hair looks _really_ good on you” Dean commented as he wiped clean his stomach

“Ditto” Castiel replied walking out the room.

Dean jumped out the bed and threw on his dressing gown and called to Castiel

“HEY MR. PENETRATOR GET YOUR CUTE LITTLE BUTT BACK HERE” Dean left the room and started walking down the stairs

“CAUSE THIS CUTE LITTLE BUTT WANTS TO GET PENETRAT- OH MY GOD!” Dean cried as he reached Cas on the stairs and notice him staring like a frightened rabbit at Sammy and Jess both sat on the sofa staring back at them looking a little bit green.

“I thought you were out?” Dean asked flustered

“The movie theatre broke down so we came back” Sammy replied not looking directly at Dean. Jess looked away stifling a laugh.

“Ahh” Dean replied “how long-“ he began

“Too long!” Sam interrupted as Cas dropped his head into Dean’s shoulder.

“Coffee?” Dean asked as Jess burst out laughing and Cas groaned embarrassed.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading, please let me know what you think either in the comments below or at my tumblr (allkindsofcrazythings)


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